First Son, Cursed Son
by wanderinggypsyfeet
Summary: Gemma talked Tara out of the abortion. What if Tara had done the same for Lyla? The result- Willow Jocelyn Winston, Opie's daughter, born and raised in Charming. She wants nothing more than to leave the protection and influence of the Reaper but that proves difficult when her entire family's SAMCRO. Then a blond haired, blue eyed man returns to Charming with questions for the club.
1. Chapter 1

**AN:** For the girl that Willow is based off of, who shares her birthday, her smarts, and love of life. You inspired her sass, her stubbornness, and her ability to deal with overprotective men. I love you and miss you more than life.

"Jordan, what are you doing?" A tall girl demands, storming down the hall, her long hair blowing in the breeze as she follows her friend out the doors of the school and to the parking lot.

"Nothing!" The girl protests defensively, wheeling around and folding her arms. The tall girl raises one perfectly sculpted eyebrow and Jordan frowns. "Wills, I'm not trying to trick you. I'm actually not doing anything." The girl frowns and reaches forward, yanking downwards on the zipper of Jordan's hoodie, revealing a low cut corset top.

"Don't ever lie to me." The girl says warningly. "Now who are you going to see, my mother or Bowen?" Jordan squirms uncomfortably.

"Bowen." She mutters finally. "But Willow it's not like that!" She insists and Willow rolls her eyes.

"Isn't like what? You're not going to go to the MC and sit on his lap and serve him beer?" Willow hisses and Jordan opens her mouth, but Willow cuts her off with a look. "I grew up there Jordy. I grew up with Bowen. So trust me when I say that you are not the first piece of barely legal ass he's chased after. Trust me, once you're 19, he won't have eyes anymore." Jordan's chin juts out defensively.

"Not true. He said I was the prettiest lass he's ever seen. He said we'd get married in Ireland." She lets slips then looks like she regrets it a moment later. Willow laughs humorlessly.

"And what? Bring you home to his ma and da? Girl, you are not the first to be taken in by those blue eyes and fake Irish promises. Trust me." Willow says then turns before Jordan can say anything else. She doesn't look back as she strides back into the school.

"Hey, Wills." A voice calls and she turns, smiling at Camila as she jogs over.

"Hi Cam." She says warmly, falling in step as they make their way to math class. Camila grunts, checking her phone. "Do not tell me Manny went off the grid again." Willow says with exasperation.

"Since last night." Camila grumbles.

"Jesus I need new friends. Ones that don't fuck gangbangers and Sons." Willow complains, slinging her bag around the back of the chair and knocking a kid's feet off her seat with one swift movement. She collapses into the chair, oblivious to his dirty look.

"Why? Where's Jordy?" Camila asks, looking around and noticing their third member is missing.

"Aye, probably on a flight ta Ireland wit Bowen." Willow informs her with a heavy Irish accent.

"Did you try to stop her?" Camila asks in alarm.

"Please." Willow scoffs. "There is no stopping Bowen's charm. Don't worry; the longest he's ever hung onto a girl is 6 months, max. She'll be back and we'll have to check her for STD's and then get ice cream." Willow says cheerfully. Camila snorts with laughter.

"Who's getting checked for STD's?" A kid in the row behind her asks. "Your mom, the pornstar?" He says with a snicker.

"No, actually." Willow says sweetly, without turning around. Camila pauses, looking up from her phone to watch. "But she certainly can afford it, since your family is spending so much money on her website. She really should offer family packs. Could save you and your overweight dad, plus your inbred brothers a whole hell of a lot of money. You could use it too." She finally turns around and looks at him. "Wal-Mart shoes sure wear out quick, don't they?" With a smirk, she faces front and is listening intently to the explanation of the algorithms they'll be working that day. Camila is snickering as the boy fumes.

"Are we going to get Jordan at least?" Camila asks, as the class gets up. Even though the bell has rung, Willow remains in her seat, fixated on the problem. "Wills." Camila says loudly and Willow shoves the paper in her bag.

"No." She decides. "If it was going to get bad, Tig or someone else would've texted me to come over. But lord knows that man has enough to worry about than some teenage girl making a fool of herself in front of the club. Go find Manny, I'll find our little slut."

"Why can't you just walk over there and go get her?" Camila wonders aloud.

"Because I try to avoid that place as much as possible." Willow grumbles, suddenly moody.

"I don't understand why." Camila says, still unaware that Willow's jaw has set into a grimace. "All those guys love you. When we had that bomb threat, there was like 87 Harley's outside the school when we evacuated."

"Yes, they're very helpful at making a show." Willow snaps then sighs when Camila gives her a startled look. "I'm sorry Cam, it's just, you know… Graduation is coming up, and I'm going to be leaving soon, and I haven't really told the club or Chibs or Pipes or Kevin or Bowen or Tig or anyone. And they're going to lose their shit. They're… Protective." She says, struggling for the right word.

"I think it's cute." Camila decides and Willow rolls her eyes.

"Yeah, then you can have 9 men point guns at your prom date's head and watch as they make him swear not to lay a finger on you. If they get that bad when I'm at school in Charming, imagine how they'll be when I tell them I'm going to UCLA in the fall." Willow says and Camila raises an eyebrow as they stop at their lockers so Willow can switch books.

"Have you even told your mom?" She questions and Willow shakes her head.

"No, and she's who I'm scared of the most." She admits.

"Then how did you manage to sign up for financial aid and all that stuff?" Camila wonders and Willow leans around the locker door with an eyebrow raised.

"Do you really think I didn't learn to forge her signature a long time ago?" She scoffs, slamming her locker shut.

"Will she really be that mad that you're going to a big school?" Camila asks and Willow shrugs.

"I mean, Ellie only went to the community college and that's great, but I want a big school. I want to be a bear and wear blue and gold and be an actual college student. I want to leave Charming." She says firmly and Camila nods.

"Yeah, me too." She agrees.

"Yeah, and move all the way to Oakland, where you can have a zillion babies with Manny and be his fat wife for the rest of your days." Willow teases then darts into her classroom before Camila can hit her.

She gets the text in her last class. She feels her phone buzz in her pocket and she struggles not to let the smirk cross her face. She continues on her homework, even though the bell has rung. She keeps working until Camila comes into the room and kicks her chair.

"Can we go now?" Camila asks.

"No. Because if I go, I have to look at my phone. And looking at my phone means reading the text from Jordan. And reading the text from Jordan means figuring out that she's sleeping with Bowen. And figuring out that she's sleeping with him means going down to the MC. And going down to the MC means having to-"

"Ok, ok, I get it." Camila cuts her off. "But let's go. Because you're my ride home." Willow sighs and packs her bag.

"Can't you Mexicans pack like 80 people in a car?" She complains. "Get a ride with your cousins or some shit, I'm sick of this."

"No, that's why you make friends with the pretty white girls, so they can drive you in their nice hybrid cars." Camila says brightly. Willow flicks her off and climbs in, starting the engine.


	2. Chapter 2

"Mom!" Willow yells when they walk into the house. She waits and when she receives no answer, smiles and walks into the kitchen.

"I don't see why you like it so much when your mom isn't home. I think she's pretty cool." Camila informs her. Willow rolls her eyes, rummaging in the fridge for an apple. She bumps it shut with her butt easily.

"Of course, everyone thinks the pornstar mother is so cool but let me tell you, having like 15 pornstars crash your 12 year old birthday party and give tips on how to give good blowjobs tends to dull that sparkle." Willow tells her.

"It's a pity we didn't meet till we were 14." Camila says wistfully and Willow sticks her tongue out at her. "Did you read Jordan's text?" She asks, switching subjects. Willow slides her the phone and Camila reads the message.

 _'It's time.'_

"It's from Pipes." Willow clarifies and Camila slides it back.

"What does that mean?" She asks curiously.

"That it's time to go get her." Willow explains with an eye roll. "But I'm gonna have my after school snack and then I'll go."

"Can I go with?" Camila asks excitedly. "I've never been inside their clubhouse, but from what the guys at school say, it's pretty cool."

"Have you located Manny?" Willow responds with and Camila waves a dismissive hand.

"Yeah, turns out he and his cousins got into a tequila drinking contest. He's hung over as hell but he'll still pick me up tonight." She says happily.

"I hope you're keeping those nice Spanish thighs closed before he puts a ring on it." Willow calls, walking to her bedroom to change.

"Ay, punta! You can't say shit!" Willow laughs as she pulls on basketball shorts and a heavy sweatshirt emblazoned with SAMCRO on the front. Camila gives her a strange look when she exits.

"What?" Willow asks, unconcerned.

"Why do you look like a 14 year old wanna be thug?" Camila questions.

"Should I go put on tight jeans and a low cut top so I look like some old lady?" Willow points out with distain and Camila puts her hands up. "C'mon, you can help me haul her ass out." Willow grunts and Camila gets up, beaming.

"What do they do all day there?" She asks as they get back in the car and Willow backs out of the driveway.

"Drink and fix cars." She mutters, frowning as she sets out for the shop and clubhouse. "Emphasis on the drinking."

"So what does Jordan do then?" Camila asks and at this, Willow cracks a knowing grin.

"She gets beer and sucks dick, mostly." She says and Camila stares at her, unsure of whether to believe her or not. Willow pulls into the yard and parks her car with a practiced ease, getting out and striding towards the clubhouse without hesitation. Camila tags behind her, looking around in interest.

Willow pulls the door open and Camila has to trot to catch it before it swings shut. Inside is what looks like any bar, with lots of alcohol and tables. A pool table takes up one corner. She doesn't have enough time to take everything in, because Willow is marching down a hallway with purpose.

"Wills, I wouldn't-" A man says, exiting the bathroom and spotting the two girls. Willow gives him a withering look and yanks the door to a bedroom open. Camila gasps and covers her eyes when she sees a naked ass high in the air. Willow has no such qualms and stares steadily as the two figures untangle.

"Jesus Christ Willow!" Jordan swears, scrambling to cover her chest. "Leave!" She orders.

"That's a no." Willow says calmly. "Bo, you really should go for a run or something. That ass is flabby as hell."

"Ah, fuck off ya lil bitch." The dark haired man says good-naturedly, rolling out of bed and struggling to put on boxers.

"You fuck off, I came to take my little slut of a friend home. And I'll thank you to quit telling her about Ireland. It's a shite country." She says while Jordan stares at her in disbelief.

"Name one bad thin' 'bout Ireland!" Bowen says heatedly.

"It produced you." Willow deadpans and Bowen grins, anger gone in the blink of an eye.

"Aye, dat's true. Shite, 'ave ya lil lassie back. I'll be back for 'er doe." He says with a wicked grin and a wink towards Jordan. He saunters out of the room easily. Willow snaps her fingers.

"Let's go." She tells Jordan, who shakes her head. "Fine, I'll go get Tig and he can drag your ass out." Willow says indifferently.

"Fine, I'm coming you bitch." Jordan snarls and Willow exits, slamming the door after her.

"Well she wasn't lying. He is cute." Camila observes as Bowen finds a bottle and downs half of it.

"Don't let him hear that or you'll be in his bed next." Willow mutters, tapping her fingers against the door.

"Hey, Wills is here!" A loud voice announces and both girls turn. Piper, Willow's older half brother is striding towards them with a wide grin and wider arms.

"Hi Pipes." Willow says warily, as she's enfolded in a hug. "Just picking up some of Bowen's damage."

"Can't you keep that thing in your pants for five minutes?" Piper demands and Bowen shrugs, unashamed. "Well, if you hang around a second, I think the rest of the guys will be in. I know Chibs would like to see you." He says, leaning back and looking down at her.

"Aye, he would." Bowen says solemnly. "Thinks it high time yer 'round more."

"Well I will be if you stop trying to tap my friends." Willow hisses as the door opens and more men spill in. Willow sighs as several raise their hand in greeting. "Hurry up!" She yells through the door. Jordan yanks it open and emerges, pissed off. "Let's go." Willow says, fairly sprinting for the door. Before she can get to it, a man with curly black hair that's got several streaks of grey in it enters the club.

"Willow Jocelyn." He says, pulling her into a hug. "Where have you been?"

"Pulling girls out of Bowen's bed, where else?" Willow says, exasperated and Tig roars with laughter.

"The sexy brown thing or the one with the tits?" He asks, looking between Camila and Jordan.

"Quit it you old perv. I'm going now and so are they." She announces. They all groan, protesting.

"Call me!" Jordan calls as Willow pulls her out the door.

"I hate you." Willow informs her flatly.

"Why?" Jordan scoffs. "You're the one who tells us all the time how those guys raised you and how great they are and how this club has been the only family you've ever had."

"Just because you're family with someone doesn't mean that you get along with them constantly." Willow retorts and before Jordan can get another jab in, the roar of a motorcycle catches their attention. They all fall silent, watching as it rounds the corner and pulls towards the club.

 **AN:** Please read and review, I will try to update this story on a fairly often basis. Let me know what you think, thanks!


	3. Chapter 3

The sound of a bike that's not their own draws all the members of the club out from wherever they were, be it the office, shop, or clubhouse. They stand and watch as the biker with his helmet and dark glasses pulls up. Willow doesn't notice that Ken and Piper have moved to flank her protectively or that Chibs is standing in the entrance to the office, watching with narrowed eyes.

The biker calmly backs his bike into the long row of bikes, as though this is normal. He sits for a moment on the bike, long enough for everyone to get nervous and start reaching for their guns, tucked in waistbands or holsters beneath cuts. Willow reaches and puts Jordan and Camila behind her.

The man gets off the bike and unclasps his helmet, hanging it on the handlebars with ease. He discards his sweatshirt and hangs that too on the bike. Then he walks, unhurried, towards the group of men that await him with guns ready.

As he gets closer, Willow realizes that he has long blond hair that's raked back. He's got blue eyes that sweep over everything and everyone, carefully noting the weapons that are being handled. He's tall but not towering, and muscular while still managing to be slim. He's confident and purposeful. He stops a ways back, so they know he's not a threat.

"Holy shit." She hears Tig whisper behind her and she wants to turn around and see what he's talking about, but she's too busy watching Chibs walk toward the man as though in a trance. Chibs has a look on his face of shock and sadness and… Hope? Willow looks between the man and Chibs, trying to figure out what is going on when the man speaks.

"My name is Abel Brendan Teller. I've come to talk to someone about my father, Jackson Nathaniel Teller." His voice is strong and carries easily. Chibs halts where he is, a couple feet from Abel.

"Why now?" He manages, his voice raspy as though he's holding back a deep well of emotion. The man holds up his hand, on which Willow sees a thick gold ring with something written on it.

"I want an explanation and my mother won't give it to me anymore." He answers easily and Chibs hesitates then nods.

"Aye, we knew yer da. Our Jackie boy." With Chibs guiding him, Abel walks into the clubhouse. Everyone watches in silence. When the door closes, Willow rounds on her two brothers.

"Who the hell is that?" She demands, bewildered. Ken looks at her, stunned.

"You don't remember Abel Teller?" He asks and Willow shakes her head slowly, trying to remember and coming up blank.

"Should I?" She questions them.

"Do you remember Thomas Teller? You're only a little bit older than him." Piper reminds her and slowly she recalls the name, heard in the stories she caught her mother telling friends and the men of the club.

"But they're gone." She says in confusion. "Mom said that their mother took them and left. We never talk about that. We never talk about dad. All I remember is that mom said that they haven't been in Charming since we were little."

"Looks like one returned. C'mon, Chibs is going to want the entire club to hear this." Tig informs Ken and Piper, who nod and follow him into the clubhouse.

"Go home. Take my car. I can get a ride. Go." Willow orders Jordan and Camila, thrusting her keys into Jordan's hands.

"What are you going to do?" Jordan calls as Willow yanks the door open. She doesn't respond but instead slams the door.

"Text mom and tell her to bring all the old ladies." Piper mutters to Willow, lagging behind as the rest of the men take their seats at the thick wood table.

"Already done." She says then looks at him expectantly, phone still in hand.

"I'll leave mine facedown on the table." He relents, dialing her number. "Make sure you stay quiet." He orders and she nods.

"Pipes, let's go." Rat calls from the doorway, waiting expectantly to shut the door. Piper hurries to join them and Rat shuts the door. Willow answers Piper's call and holds her phone to her ear as she locks herself in one of the bedrooms.

"Sit, Abel." She hears Chibs say.

"I prefer to stand." Abel responds and Willow sinks down on the bed, phone pressed tightly to her ear.

"Well, we're in here because of you. So say your piece." Tig says and Willow makes a face as she arranges the blankets and reveals several pairs of lacy underwear. She moves them aside, anxious to hear more about the past they've worked so hard to conceal.

"Well, it's obvious you all know who I am." Abel says and for the first time, some doubt creeps into his voice.

"Christ, how can't we? You look just like Jax." Happy mutters.

"And you know who we are." T.O.'s deep voice makes Willow smile. He's always been one of her favorites.

"Actually, I don't." Abel says quietly and Willow waits impatiently for someone to break the silence. She'd pay to be in the room.

"Did Wendy- your mom- never tell you anything?" Tig asks and Willow gnaws on her lip at the hurt in Tig's voice.

"No. She refused to talk about my dad. To me, to my brother," Abel says but Chibs cuts him off.

"Thomas. How is he?" He asks urgently.

"Good, good. Gonna graduate high school soon." Abel says.

"He's Willow's age." Ken adds, likely for Bowen's sake, since he is the only one in room not to know Abel.

"Willow…. Winston?" Abel asks slowly and Willow jumps, despite knowing that no one in the room knows she's listening.

"You know Willow?" Piper asks sharply.

"No, my mom just has a photo of Thomas and another baby. The back is labeled Willow Winston. We never knew who she was." Abel says softly and Willow covers her mouth. She has that exact same photograph, though it's tucked in a leather bound album she hasn't seen since she was younger.

"Well, ya passed 'er on da way in." Chibs grunts. "Now why ya here Abel? We can' tell ya nothin' 'bout yer da ya don' know already."

"Actually, you can tell me everything about my dad, because my mother won't say a word. Won't even show us pictures of him as president. I remember a little bit of him… And my grandmother. Thomas remembers nothing. But I need to know my dad. I need to know why my grandma gave me this." Willow hears Abel set something on the table. The sound makes her think of the gold ring that glinted on his finger outside and again she curses the fact that she can't see anything.

"That… Is a loaded question, Abel." Happy says after a long breath.

"She said I could wear it when I joined the MC. I hid it from my mother, my brother, everyone. But now I want answers. What is it? What does it mean?" A desperate note has crept into Abel's voice.

"That is a Son ring. Very few men have that ring. I only know of two, both of them dead and buried." Tig says lowly.

"Dis is a story for another time." Chibs says warningly.

"No. It's now." Abel says sharply.

"Fine." Tig responds shortly. "The only two men to have those rings were John Teller and Clay Morrow. John was your father's father and he gave the ring to Jax. And Clay raised Jax when JT died. So that's your inheritance son, just like that Harley you rode in on and this club. And your mother did everything to prevent you from claiming it, because your father died to protect you from this fate!"

Dead silence follows Tig's outburst. Willow's mind is racing from the information Tig has spilled and she checks her phone several times to make sure Piper hasn't hung out on her, but the call is still going. No one speaks. She's debating piping up so they'll talk when Abel speaks.

"I remember the man my father was. I remember him loving me and playing with me. I remember him cuddling me. I don't know if I made these memories up or if they're true, but I need to know everything there is about him, because I can't move on with my life until his ghost stops hovering over me." He says softly.

"Go wait outside. We need to discuss this." Happy says and Willow ends the call, exiting the bedroom and entering the main room at the same time as Bowen shuts the door behind Abel.


	4. Chapter 4

"Hey." She says, lifting her chin up slightly. She doesn't know what spurs her to do it, but she's determined to say something to him. He looks up at her, still adjusting the ring on his finger. "You need to know that if you walk out of this clubhouse with a prospect kutte on your back, you won't last six months. Boys never do." She warns him.

"Who said I'm a boy, not a man?" He asks, with a charming smile.

"I do. You're all the same. Little boys who think a motorcycle and a kutte make them tough and invincible. It doesn't. You'll fall out, just like they do. Unlike you, I grew up here. And I've watched so many guys prospect for them and not be able to hack it. You'll be the same." She says indifferently.

"Who even are you?" He demands and she smiles, hopping up on the counter and pouring herself a shot of Jack.

"Willow Jocelyn Winston, at your service. Apparently your dad was my dad's best friend. I guess I know more about that than you do though don't I? Salud, daddy dearest." She says bitterly, toasting the row of mug shots on the wall with her shot then downing it. She doesn't even flinch at the taste. The mug shots catch Abel's eyes and he wanders over, inspecting them.

"My dad." He says in surprise, spotting the picture of Jackson Teller. Willow looks between the two and understands what Happy meant when he said that they looked alike. Abel has his father's long blond hair and blue eyes. His scruff isn't as pronounced but it's got potential. He's even got the same jawline.

"My dad." Willow says, tearing her eyes away from comparing the two of them, nodding at the mug shot a couple spaces over. Abel looks at it, and then looks at her, then back at it.

"You have his eyes." He tells her.

"I know." She says quietly. "I can tell you every guy on that wall and what their charges were. And if you don't walk out of here, you'll end up like all of them." She says coolly.

"What do you have against this club?" Abel wonders inquiringly.

"It killed my father. And turned my brothers into drunk, protective assholes." She hisses. "And it'll turn me into an old lady if I let it. But I'm not going to." She says confidently.

"Let what do what?" Ken asks her, as they all exit chapel.

"Nothing." Willow says quickly, hiding the Jack bottle and hopping down. "Who can give me a ride home?"

"Me, I'm going that way anyways." Rat grunts and she waits as the club faces Abel, who awaits them with folded arms.

"Ya got sum place ta stay?" Chibs asks and Abel nods.

"Motel room down the street."

"Stay there. You can come back tomorrow and we'll talk about your old man some more." Tig tells him and Abel nods.

"I can give her a ride if you need me to." He offers Rat, nodding to Willow.

"That won't happen." Ken says firmly, putting a hand on Willow's shoulder. She shrugs it off with a face.

"Then lets go Rat." She says, staring daggers at her brother. He watches her leave, unfazed. She climbs onto the back on Rat's motorcycle and he guides it to the gate. He pauses there, as Willow's mother's car is pulling in.

"Rat, what's going on?" Lyla asks, rolling down the window and looking at them with concern.

"Abel Teller is here." Rat says flatly.

"Shit." She swears, startled. "Does Chibs know?"

"We had church, don't worry. He can stay a couple more days. You'll know him when you see him." He tells her.

"He always did look so much like Jax." She muses. "You going home baby?" She asks her daughter.

"Homework." Willow says, by way of explanation. Lyla nods and waves as Rat pulls out onto the street. Willow rides with Rat, contemplative about Abel. "Thanks for the ride Rat." She says, jumping off and handing him her helmet. "What are you doing?" She asks Rat as he parks his bike in front of her house.

"Walking you in." Rat says easily.

"I'm not a baby." Willow protests.

"I know, but if Ken or Pipes finds out I didn't walk you in, they'd have my balls. I'd like to keep my balls." He says and Willow exhales out of her nose, storming up to her door and slamming it shut. Rat follows in amusement.

"Look, I'm all safe!" She yells through the open window.

"I dunno, maybe I should stand watch." He teases, laughing as Willow spirals into a rage, cussing at him and threatening to go get a gun. "Wills, I'm teasing. For the love of all things holy, calm down." He says, strapping his helmet back on.

"I'll murder you George!" She yells.

"Don't use my first name." He orders. She flicks him off through the window screen then slams it down.

"His name is George but he likes it when they call him Rat?" Jordan asks in confusion, sitting on the couch and watching in amusement.

"I don't know why men do stupid shit Jordan." Willow retorts and Camila sniggers. Jordan rolls her eyes.

"Are you taking us home?" She asks and Willow shakes her head, pulling out her math book.

"I've already missed like an hour of studying to this bullshit. I'm not losing any more." She says flatly.

"I'll call Manny." Camila reassures Jordan, who groans and flops down on the couch, throwing a hand over her face.

"Don't be dramatic." Willow mutters, tying her hair up and pulling her calculator towards her.

"Wills, we're leaving." Camila calls awhile later and Willow raises a hand, still typing on her calculator.

"Bye bitch." Jordan yells, getting in the car.

"Remember to eat!" Camila yells, while Manny honks, blaring Spanish music. Willow disregards it all, moving onto English homework.

 **AN:** Thanks for all the reviews and everything guys! You are all amazing. Feel free to review.


	5. Chapter 5

"Baby girl…" Lyla says, walking in and looking at her in concern. The sun is near setting, giving the room a pink glow to it.

"Hi ma." Willow says distractedly, trying to gather up all of her papers. Lyla picks one up and reads it over.

"You're doing a lot of homework lately." She observes.

"That's what senior year is all about." Willow reminds her.

"Well my senior year was all about flying from Miami to LA for photo shoots and film stuff." Lyla recalls fondly.

"Well mom, not everyone can be a pornstar." Willow says shortly and Lyla rolls her eyes.

"I wish you could go one day without bitching about what I do for work." She complains, opening the fridge and pulling out some lettuce and salad dressing, setting them in front of Willow.

"And I wish I could go one day without my damn brothers and the rest of my crazy club uncles not stirring shit up in my life." Willow says hotly. "Abel Teller returns and suddenly shit with my dad is going to get brought up. I just want to graduate and leave Charming." Lyla freezes and Willow cringes.

"What did they say about your dad?" She asks softly and Willow relaxes, realizing that her mother hasn't picked up on the last part.

"Nothing about dad specifically. Just… Abel." She says, struggling. "He's a Teller, we grew up together and then everyone locks up all the memories we've ever had and never speaks again. Hell, you know that Ellie and I tried to open those photo albums and you nearly murdered us. So all the sudden they're going to start telling stories like everything is great. Like we are all one big happy family and my daddy didn't die for this crew." She spills out and Lyla slowly pulls her into a hug. Willow resists it for a moment then leans in.

"Sweetheart, he loved you." She whispers. "And they all love you. You know that. Your dad died for that club and they made up for it by raising you. I know that you hate how your brothers treat you. But you are their little girl."

"I don't want to talk about my dad. I don't want to talk about the club. I don't want to pretend that I'm some good little sister who behaves herself and never steps a toe out of line. I don't want to pretend that the club is a good thing. I don't want to pretend that this is normal, that carrying guns and getting blackout drunk and waking up in some hooker's arms is normal!" Willow cries and Lyla smiles crookedly, patting her cheek.

"Sweetie, that's their normal." She points out.

"Well it shouldn't be. And I'm not about to stand by and encourage them." Willow says stoutly. "I'm not going to be their daughter anymore." Lyla laughs, shaking her head.

"Oh, Willow Jocelyn. You can't tell them that you're not family any more than you can tell me that. Family is who would die for you and like it or not little girl; every single guy in that clubhouse would go down swinging for you. But if it bothers you that Abel's there, I'll just tell Pipes that you're spending some time with Ellie. That way you don't have to be around when they toast your father and Jax, alright?" She bargains.

"But I can't go visit Ellie. I have a history test next weekend. I need to study for it this weekend." Willow says blankly and Lyla waves a hand.

"Skip it." She says dismissively.

"It's the last test before the final mom." Willow says, rubbing her temples. "I need to get a good score on this one so that I have some wiggle room on the final." Lyla rolls her eyes and begins chopping up lettuce.

"Are finals really that important?" She asks and Willow sets her head down on the table, sighing.

"Yes mom." She says dully.

"Well then ask Ellie if she can come down here. But you know she'll visit the club." She warns her and Willow just keeps her head down.

"Wait, mom." She says suddenly, popping her head up and watching her mother carefully. "Do we still have that photo? Of me and…" She hesitates then plunges on. "Me and Thomas. Sleeping. As babies." Lyla stiffens almost unperceivably. Willow only notices because she's looking for it.

"Um, no." She says, after a moment too long. "I don't think we do." She keeps chopping the lettuce for the salad with a determined air.

"Really?" Willow needles. "Because I remember looking at it once, in those albums. The ones with dad." Lyla slams the knife down, making Willow jump.

"No." She says, voice trembling. "Those photos are gone Willow. Do not ask again." Then, after taking a couple deep breathes, she picks the knife up and resumes cutting the lettuce.

"It's just," Willow says; voice tiny, "Abel mentioned it today. He was talking about how they had that photo too. Thomas has the same photo and I just wanted to see it." Lyla gently sets the knife aside.

"I'm sorry Willow, I don't think I have it." She repeats, eyes far away. Then she shakes her head and scoops some lettuce into a bowl, shoving salad dressing roughly towards Willow. Willow takes a contemplative mouthful, not pressing her mother anymore.


	6. Chapter 6

She steadfastly ignores the buzzing of her phone as she works through science problems. She doesn't even notice that her classmates are looking at her curiously, as her phone keeps going off.

"Excuse me, Ms. Winston." Her teacher says sharply and she looks up. "Could you please silence your device?" She stares balefully at him, then reaches into her bag and pulls her phone out.

"Shit." She swears under her breath when she sees it's not texts she missing, it's calls. Specifically, calls from Chibs, which never mean anything good. She glances up and sees that her teacher is still glaring at her so she stuffs the phone back in her bag and smiles brightly.

"May we resume?" He asks, flipping to a new slide. Willow waves a hand, causing several students to snicker. She fidgets through class, something rare for her. When the bell rings she bolts out the door, darting past everyone.

"Willow?" Camila's questioning voice calls but Willow's already running out the doors, throwing them open with a loud bang and disappearing down the steps. Camila sticks her head out the door, eyebrows furrowed.

"What's going on?" Willow demands, holding the phone between her ear and shoulder as she puts the car in drive and backs out of her parking stall, narrowly avoiding a truck behind her.

"Are ya comin' ta da club?" Chibs asks her and she doesn't bother to look left or right as she races out of the parking lot.

"I'm on my way right now, but I'm missing my last two classes." She informs him, thinking ruefully that she had tried to stop Jordan from leaving at the exact same time a couple days ago.

"Good lass." Chibs says and there's a tone to his voice that makes Willow's stomach hurt.

"Chibs, is everyone ok?" She asks carefully, fearing the answer. As far as she knows, the club shouldn't be in danger, but she's received unpleasant news midday before. He takes a deep breath.

"Aye, everythin's fine, fer now." He says darkly and Willow accelerates, taking a corner and making her tires squeal. She nearly jumps the curb when she pulls into the yard, slamming on the brakes and leaving the keys in the ignition, racing into the clubhouse. She bursts in and skids to a stop, taking in the scene.

Ken and Piper are standing behind Bowen, Happy, and T.O, all who are using significant strength to hold the two back. Ken's dark hair is messy and he has a slight manic glint in his eyes. Chibs, Tig, Rat, Abel, and a couple hang-arounds sit at the bar, talking lowly. Willow is startled to see that Quinn and Montez are sitting at a table, smoking and watching with interest. She hadn't known they had gotten back from visiting Montez's kids. All the men are staring at the two people in the center of the room.

"Oh, shit." She says loudly when she recognizes Ellie's long blond hair in its customary braid down her back. She's dressed in skintight black jeans, with a tight, low cut white corset top. Her boots are black and extend to mid-thigh. Willow's willing the bet the amount of cleavage she's showing is what sent Ken and Piper into their murderous rage.

She would've lost. She tears her eyes off Ellie and takes a full step back when she fully takes in the man next to her. He's got black hair slicked back and is eyeing his surroundings coolly. He's tall, at least over 6 feet, though his thick biker boots may have been helping that. Most importantly, however, is his kutte. It's black and the patch on the back announces him as a Wild Bunch Forever Rider, another motorcycle club.

"Hi, Willy-Bear." Ellie says cheerfully, glancing over her shoulder and waving at her baby sister.

"Ellie." She says tightly, looking over the scene again, noting all the possible weapons lying around. "Welcome home. Long time, no see."

"I've been a little busy. New job, new clients, getting myself settled." Ellie says airily. "You know how it goes. Where's mom?"

"I imagine she'll be here pretty quick." Willow says, looking at her oldest half sister with wide eyes.

"Probably." Ellie says thoughtfully then shrugs. "Well, in the mean time, meet Gavin. Gav, this is my little sister, Willow Jocelyn Winston." The man looks at her with brown eyes, his face an emotionless mask.

"Hi." Willow says weakly, now understanding why Chibs had called her so many times. The club is a breath away from a shootout. Gavin nods his head then resumes staring down Ken and Piper.

"How's school?" Ellie asks sunnily, checking her manicured nails and frowning when she finds a chip.

"Good." Willow asks, not looking at her sister but rather her brothers, calculating what they will do if Ellie or Gavin does something wrong.

"Missing class, aren't you?" Ellie points out and Willow tears her eyes away to glare at her sister, who smiles smugly.

"I think this might be more important." She argues and Ellie rolls her eyes.

"Oh, just cause my brothers and all my crazy uncles are mad that I didn't marry a Son. " She says dismissively.

"Marriage?" Willow demands, her heart racing as she looks for a ring. Ellie laughs, shaking her head.

"No, Willy-Bear. When I get married, you'll be there. I just really happen to like Gavin." She informs her.

"And he just really happens to be a WBR!" Piper shouts and T.O has to dig his heels in to stop him. Ellie stares her stepbrother down levelly.

"And I happen to be a 28 year old woman, Piper." She says, with icy calm. "I will make my own decisions, regardless of this club. You will accept that I am with Gavin and you will accept it quickly."

"Well, I need a drink." Willow mutters and Tig slides her a shot, eyes still glued to Gavin. She takes it and leans against Tig, watching thoughtfully as Ellie returns to checking her nails and occasionally glancing up at her brothers. It's not long before Lyla strides in.

 **AN:** Please read and review, I love hearing what you guys have to say about this story!


	7. Chapter 7

"Hi ma." Ellie says sweetly, stepping forward to kiss her stepmother's cheek. "I've missed you." Lyla accepts the kiss but her eyes are on Gavin.

"Who'd you bring home to meet the family?" She asks levelly, as Gavin bows his head at her.

"This is Gavin ma. Met him a couple weeks after I moved in. He's a sweetheart. I thought you'd like him. If everyone would quit reaching for guns, I'm sure he'd be a little more chatty." Ellie says, her tone light, her words direct.

"Well I'm sure if you would've given us a heads up, your uncles would be a little less jumpy." Lyla says flatly and Ellie's eyes have an amused twinkle as she responds with,

"And where's the fun surprise in that?"

"Where does the club fall on this?" Lyla asks, looking at Happy and Chibs. Happy nods to Chibs, deferring to his judgment.

"Well," Chibs says slowly. "Yer her ma, an' it's up ta ya what ya think. If ya say ta accept it, the club will." He looks directly at Ken and Piper, who sag a little. Lyla looks Gavin up and down with a critical eye.

"We can get to know him." She decides finally and tension disappears from Ellie's shoulders. She reaches out and takes Gavin's hand, squeezing it. Ken throws up his hands and stalks out.

"C'mon, sit." Ellie encourages Gavin and Lyla, waving a hand for them to join her at a table. "Gav, this is my stepmom Lyla, but she's been my mom for so long I just call her that. Mom, this is Gavin." Slowly, the men of the club relax. Piper leans against the wall, eyes narrowed at Gavin.

"Someone should go get Ken." Willow observes.

"You wanna be that someone?" Tig asks her with a raised eyebrow and she shakes her head quickly.

"I think he needs to be away from sisters right now." She muses and Tig's mouth quirks into a smile. Now that the threat is over, the guys are relaxing and talking at the bar and tables. Quinn joins them, standing next to Willow.

"Willow." He says, nodding to her as she watches her mother listen to Ellie speak about Gavin with a tight mouth.

"Hi Quinn. How was Arizona?" She asks distractedly.

"Warm. What's your gut on this?" He asks and she shrugs.

"Ellie's a big girl. Is anyone surprised that she went and found a biker to shack up with?" She scoffs and Quinn raises an eyebrow, along with Chibs and Tig, who are listening. "You create us." Willow points out then gets up and walks out of the clubhouse. She's leaning on the picnic bench when Abel joins her.

"Interesting day." He comments, sitting next to her. Willow doesn't even look at him, just snorts.

"If this was interesting, you've clearly never been around an MC. That was damn peaceful." She mutters, shaking her hair out so she can start to braid it back. Abel glances at her.

"I haven't, but you clearly have." He says carefully and Willow sticks her tongue out, trying to get the last stubborn bit of hair into the braid.

"Well my mom married my dad and then he died in prison before I was even out of diapers, so a lot of my time growing up was spent getting babysat by prospects or prostitutes. The clubhouse has been the most stable thing in my life, which is scary." She broods.

"Is that what you meant back there, when you said that the club creates you?" He asks and she gives a humorless laugh.

"The men of the club give us just enough attention to make us think it's love, but never enough to make us happy. So we just keep longing for it. Then they wonder why we end up in the arms of bikers. We're just trying to fix what we never got in childhood. It's daddy issues. I've made my peace with it." She says firmly and Abel looks thoughtful.

"So this is just your sister following in your mom's footsteps?" He asks.

"Half sister." Willow says, before she can stop herself. She's not sure why she's telling Abel this, but the words spill out again. "We have different moms. Her mom died when she was young and our dad remarried my mom. Ellie practically raised me, since we're 10 years apart. She took better care of me than my mom did sometimes." She says flatly.

"And what about your brothers?" He asks and she shrugs.

"They're just like my dad, even Piper, who isn't technically his kid. These men surround me. They're all I've ever known."

"But you don't want to be an old lady for some biker?" He asks and she gets a steely glint in her eye.

"You want to know the mark of a good old lady?" She asks him, leaning forward and resting her elbows on her knees.

"What?" He responds, raising an eyebrow.

"They always do what they're told. They never question what the club thinks is best. They always behave like the club wants them to." She says and he continues to stare at her in amusement.

"So you'd make a terrible old lady." He comments and she leans back with a grin that shows her sharp, white teeth.

"That's the plan." She says quietly, before Ken rounds the corner, still red in the face. Willow stares up at him balefully.

"Wills, if you ever pull that shit, I'll kill him." He growls and Willow just blinks her big hazel eyes.

"What about killing me, that only seems fair." She says innocently. He just clenches his fists and walks inside. Willow leans back with a smile.

"Do your brothers know you're not going to be an old lady?" Abel asks her with mild curiosity.

"Does your brother know you're here, at some MC in NorCal?" She lashes back instantly, making Abel lean away from her in surprise. "Does your mom know you'll prospect for them?"

"I'm here to learn about my dad, so I can close this chapter on my life and move on." Abel reiterates stubbornly.

"I've never seen anyone ride in here on a bike like that and not ride back out with a prospect kutte on their back. Trust me, I grew up in an MC." Willow says, flashing her dangerous smile again. "Now, how long you last, that's another story." She says smoothly.

"And how many girls grow up in a club like this and don't become a stripper, hooker, junkie, or someone's old lady?" Abel snaps back and Willow gapes at him. He stands and walks inside with hardly a look back at her.

 **AN:** Please read and review! I want to hear what you guys think; it's my favorite part of writing.


	8. Chapter 8

She follows him a beat later, fuming. She fully intends to tell him off but stops and changes course when she sees how Ellie's fists are clenched on the table and Piper and Ken are standing shoulder to shoulder, both their faces carefully blank. She hurries towards the table.

"Take a walk." She orders quietly and they both stare down at her, unmoving. "Now." She says, digging her nails into their chests. They both flinch and stalk towards the bar. She sits.

"Go check on your bike." Ellie urges Gavin and he gets up instantly, his emotions still carefully shrouded. Ellie raises an eyebrow at Willow, who waits for Gavin to get out of earshot, then hisses furiously,

"Nice going El!"

"What did I do?" Ellie asks innocently. Willow points to the door Gavin just exited from.

"I wanted you to come here so the club would get off my back about being around, so that this shit with Abel would blow over and I wouldn't have to deal with it. And you just riled them up even more!" Willow accuses.

"Abel…. Teller?" Ellie demands, wide eyed. Willow jerks her thumb at the bar, where it looks as though Abel is attempting to engage Ken and Piper in a conversation about installing new drag bars on his bike. Neither appears to be interested in anything but the door. "Holy shit." Ellie breathes.

"Yeah." Willow says flatly. "He wants to know about his dad, which means that everyone is going to start bringing up all the stories about the good old days with dad and Jax and they're gonna remember all the good things and none of the bad. They'll drink and talk and laugh and it'll be great until he gets sucked in and all the sudden he's dead, just like dad." She says and Lyla shoves away from the table without a word. Ellie watches her go silently.

"Willow, what's really going on?" She asks, a suspicious look on her face and Willow winces. She's never been able to lie to her big sister.

"I got into college." She whispers. "At UCLA. And I'm going to go." Ellie's jaw drops and for several long moments, she has nothing to say.

"What?" She says weakly, once she finally manages to speak. Willow nods firmly, glancing at Chibs and Happy.

"That's why I wanted to club to just be happy and even keel for once. So that I can tell them I'm leaving Charming and they won't lose their minds. But now, with Abel here, it's just going to stir up all the memories of dad and what happened and what they owe me. The last thing dad did was die for this club and no one will let me go with that fresh on their minds." Willow says and Ellie rubs her temples.

"UCLA is like five hours away." She tells Willow, who nods.

"I know. That's why I wanted to have you here. So they would see that they can start letting the Winston girls go. That they don't need to protect the daughter of some stupid convict." She spits.

"Hey." Ellie says sharply. "He was my dad too, long before he was yours. I grew up without him, just like you. And I lost him, just like you, except I was old enough to know and remember and hurt!" Her eyes well with tears and she looks away, biting her lip. Willow's heart sinks at the sight of Ellie's distress. "I get your anger Wills." She says finally, quietly. "But if you keep directing it at the club, you'll only hurt the people that love you. So remember that before you go talking about the dad you hate and the dad you lost."

"El, I'm sorry." Willow says instantly, feeling the guilt overwhelm her. "I didn't mean to sound like I hate dad…" Ellie waves a hand.

"Don't say sorry, I went through the same shit as you. Lyla helped me through it, and so did the club. That's when I started calling her mom." She reveals. "And that's why I made peace with him and all that he did, including you." Willow looks at her, affronted and Ellie smiles.

"How can I make peace with the club that refuses to see me as anything more than a helpless infant?" She mutters and Ellie shrugs.

"Do something that'll rattle their cages." She advises wisely.

"Like bringing home a biker?" Willow asks with a quirked eyebrow and Ellie winks, standing up and walking towards the bar.

"I'm gonna go show Gavin little Charming town." She says loudly, kissing Piper, Ken, and Tig's cheeks. All watch her go with narrowed eyes and when she exits, burst into protests.

"Should've shot him where he stood-"

"Who does he think he is-"

"Standin' there like he owned da place-"

"A fucking WBR!"

"If Opie had seen that shit-"

"Fucking Ellie, what was she-"

Willow shakes her head and walks out the door, leaning against the doorframe as she watches Ellie and Gavin roar away on his bike. She feels her mother join her and she hesitates, and then leans her head on her shoulder.

"She always knows how to make an entrance and exit, doesn't she?" Lyla observes dryly.

"Well, I wanted the club distracted from Abel. She certainly did that." Willow responds with a heavy sigh.

"Sometimes I think she only does this kind of shit to make them squirm. It would've made your dad squirm, I can tell you that much." Lyla says and Willow sighs; feeling like a headache is coming on.

"She's Ellie. She does what she wants and laughs when it sends Piper and Ken into a rage. She's just lucky she doesn't have to deal with them coming home drunk and pissed off." She says darkly.

"I'll take care of it. Spend the night at Jordan's or Cam's." Lyla suggests and Willow shakes her head.

"I need to get caught up on homework. Besides, I don't think I can handle listening to either of them talk about Manny or Bowen." She says, making a face.

"Maybe if you'd get a boyfriend, you'd understand." Lyla teases.

"Please, if I tried to date anyone besides a Son, I doubt it'd go any better than that right there." Willow says, gesturing to the club. Lyla shrugs.

"Maybe, but at least Ellie blazed the trail for you." She points out, and then goes back into the club. Willow ponders it for a while then cracks her neck and climbs in her car, headed for home.

 **AN:** Please tell me what you think, leave reviews, follows, favorites, comments, questions, concerns, all that good stuff!


	9. Chapter 9

Jordan and Camila are waiting on her porch when she gets home, arguing about whether or not they are going to decorate their caps for graduation. Camila is just insisting that it is pointless when Willow walks up the steps and sits next to them with a huff.

"So how come you can go to club midday but I can't?" Jordan demands the second Willow is seated.

"Because my sister brought a biker back, so that is just a bit more important than your desire to get laid." Willow says offhandedly, making Camila cover her mouth to stop snickering.

"Wait, Ellie's home?" Jordan asks and Willow nods, checking her phone and sighing when reminders for her homework pop up.

"Yup, and on the back of some guys bike, nonetheless." Willow mutters, scrolling through her list of things to do. "At least the club will be too busy trying to sort that shit out to remind me to be around more often. Do either of you want to get coffee tomorrow? I need to work on homework." She announces.

"I'm going to Oakland tonight for the weekend, Manny has a quinceañera he wants to go to." Camila informs them and both Jordan and Willow turn to look at her. "Hey, it's a big deal! That's family shit, it means he's serious!" She protests and Willow looks at Jordan, who puts her hands up.

"I'm not doing anything with you until you promise that I can see Bowen without you throwing a fit." She negotiates. Willow mulls it over, then shakes her head and gets up.

"See you two on Monday then." She says, opening the door and letting it slam shut. Camila sighs.

"I hate when you two fight over a boy." She says gloomily, standing and pulling Jordan up.

"What do you mean, fight over a boy? We don't fight over boys- I get a boyfriend and she gets jealous." Jordan insists and she and Camila bicker as they walk down the sidewalk.

Willow sips on her coffee, absentmindedly stirring more of the whipped cream into it as she tries to memorize the workings of a cell. She's so engrossed in thought she doesn't notice that someone has sat across from her at her little table and is thumbing through her math book.

"Who in their right mind takes calculus their senior year?" Abel asks and she jumps, setting her book down. "Isn't it about slacking off?" He teases, grinning up at her despite the fact she's glaring at him.

"The more college classes I do here, the more likely I am to get through college in 4 years or under, so hand it over." She orders and he ignores her, still looking through it.

"Jesus, you must be smart to get this stuff. I saw this on Tommy's homework once, but none of the rest of us could figure it out." He recalls fondly.

"Glad to see where the brains went in your family." She says coolly, hand still extended for the book.

"Well, I reckon the fact that his mom was a doctor and my mom was a junkie might factor into it just a little." He says nonchalantly, handing her the book. She's gaping at him and not expecting it, so it crashes amid her papers and other books. He raises an eyebrow.

"I… I didn't… Know that." She stammers.

"You're not the only one from Charming with a half sibling." He says conversationally, leaning back and looking around him curiously. People sit in small groups at tables, enjoying coffee or tea, talking in low tones. Flowers bloom all around, in hanging pots and troughs. "I like this place."

"Why are you here?" She asks suddenly, wondering if it's a coincidence that he's in her favorite coffee shop.

"Maybe I like coffee." He suggests.

"Then go buy some." She points out and he smiles again.

"You got me. I was looking for you. Bowen said that you'd be here, that you usually are on Saturdays." He admits.

"Why?" She repeats suspiciously.

"I wanted to say sorry for the other day, what I said about girls that grow up in the MC. It was out of line and rude." He apologizes and her eyebrows jump up. "I thought I shouldn't waste any time."

"Why say sorry? I said some pretty nasty stuff too." Willow reminds him, leaning back and folding her arms, wary of a trap.

"Yeah, but your sister- sorry, half sister- had just set everyone off. You had a reason to get pissed. I shouldn't have said that stuff." He says, still relaxed.

"Most guys in the MC don't say sorry." She says slowly and he throws his hands up, exasperated.

"How many times do I have to remind you, I'm not in the MC." He maintains. Willow keeps her tongue in check as he runs a hand through his hair. "Well, I just wanted to say sorry, in case I don't see you before I leave."

"You're leaving?" She asks, forgetting about her silence.

"Well, I never planned to stay here very long. Like I said, I wanted to learn about my dad from the people that my mom would never talk about. I reckon I learned quite a bit." He says and Willow recognizes that carefully hidden pain. She does it too. "So I'll leave Charming pretty quick and you can get back to whatever you were planning on trying to get away with." He sums up quickly.

"Oh, well that's… good." She says lamely. He nods; suddenly back to his bright smiles. He gets up.

"Well, I'll see you then." With a nod, he's gone, back on his bike and roaring off. Willow stares at her biology book, but she's not really comprehending any of it anymore.

 **AN:** Please, please, pretty please with a cherry on top, leave me reviews and comments and thoughts! I want to know what you guys think- this is one of the first stories I've loved enough to publish. I would love to hear thoughts on it.

 **An PT 2:** I'm thinking about starting a Jax/Tara pre-series fic, (raise your hand if you're in denial that they're gone) since I can't get the image of teenage Jax out of my head. Would that be something anyone is interested in reading?


	10. Chapter 10

She wanders back in the house, still pondering why Abel leaving had made her feel a twinge of regret. Ellie and Gavin are sitting at the table and their conversation dies off as Willow floats through the kitchen and pulls open the fridge, grabbing an apple and sitting down next to them.

"Hi Wills." Ellie says unsurely.

"What is the deal with this town and SAMCRO?" Willow demands abruptly, apparently not taking notice of Gavin. "I don't want Abel here. He stirs up old shit and I've moved on." She tells them, a bit fiercely.

"But you want him here because if he isn't, no one will ever talk about dad again." Ellie says wisely and Willow looks at her, startled. "Like I said Will, he was my dad too. I know what it's like. You move in cycles. You don't want anyone to talk about it, and then all you want to do is talk about until you lose your voice. He just forced you to swing from one extreme to the other."

"Well, he's leaving soon, so I expect that I'll be able to swing back to ignoring the club pretty quick." She grumbles.

"He's leaving?" Ellie asks. Willow nods. "Huh." Ellie says, leaning back.

"What?" Willow asks, raising an eyebrow.

"Do you remember the last time we tried to bring out the photo albums?" Ellie asks her and Willow snorts.

"How I thought mom was going to tear your head off? Yeah, I promise I don't forget that shit." She says and Ellie grins.

"Well, lets bring a Teller around mom, get her a couple glasses in, and see if he does the trick." Ellie suggests and Willow stares at her with wide eyes.

"Why do you want into them?" She asks and Ellie's hand involuntarily clenches into a fist. It relaxes when Gavin puts a hand over it.

"Because I'm in the stage where I only remember the good." She says quietly. "And I want pictures of my dad." Willow nods.

"I'll text Pipes. I'll tell him to invite Abel over for supper tonight." She says thoughtfully. "Then we'll tell mom that Ken and Pipes are bringing him. You get her favorite bottle of wine." She orders, pulling out her phone.

"Oh, and Wills?" Ellie says hesitantly.

"What?" Willow asks distractedly.

"There's a family supper Sunday night." She warns. Willow looks at her, uncomprehending. "At Happy's house." She clarifies and Willow scowls. "Don't look at me like that, I didn't declare it!" She protests.

"I'll bet you all I have in savings that Happy went home with news of him," She jerks her thumb towards Gavin. "And Zaneta decided one big family get together is just what we need." She says angrily.

"Well, so be it. Help me make that apple pie that Chibs likes so much." Ellie says, ignoring Willow's hissy fit. Willow groans but gets up and opens the pantry, cussing. Gavin grins when Ellie glances back at him.

"I like her." He decides.

"The feelings not mutual yet Gavin!" Willow calls and he and Ellie try to stifle their laughter.

"What's that smell?" Lyla yells as she walks in.

"Wills and I made a pie for Sunday supper." Ellie explains, idly flipping through a magazine as Willow finishes labeling a map of Europe.

"And what's in the oven?" Lyla asks suspiciously, cracking it open.

"A roast." Willow answers, rolling the paper up and snapping a rubber band around it triumphantly.

"That doesn't smell like my roast." Lyla says, eyes narrowed.

"It's Gavin's recipe, I like it." Ellie says, still carefully reading the magazine. Lyla pursues her lips then shuts the oven.

"And where's he?"

"Getting wine for supper." Willow says, crawling over and sitting herself in front of Ellie. Ellie sets aside the magazine and starts braiding her hair.

"Is Abel coming?" Lyla asks with a raised eyebrow and both girls nod. "And Wills didn't throw a fit?" She jabs. Willow sticks her tongue out.

"I'm over my dislike of him." She proclaims loftily. Then she shrugs. "Besides, I feel bad for the kid. At least I grew up with some stories of my dad. He didn't get any of that." She watches as her mother looks up briefly, a look of sadness on her face. Then she nods and leaves the living room.

"Nice touch." Ellie mutters.

"I figure if we want to dig those albums out, she's gonna need wine and some guilt tripping." Willow mummers back and Ellie nods, impressed.

"What smells so good?" Piper demands, the instant he opens the door.

"There's a roast in the oven, but don't touch the pie on the counter!" Ellie bellows and she and Willow scramble off the couch and run for the kitchen. Piper is grabbing a knife and advancing on the pie, clearly ignoring them. Willow snatches the pie away.

"Aww, guys." He complains.

"You can have some Sunday." Ellie tells him, plucking the knife from his hands. "No touching." She orders, waving it at Ken and Abel, who put their hands up, instantly wary.

"Set the table." Willow says, putting oven mitts on. Piper and Ken open cupboards and drawers, laughing and joking as they pull chairs up.

"Where's Gavin?" Ken asks and though he struggles to keep his tone disinterested, Ellie still tenses.

"He's decided to go see what bars Charming has to offer." She says between gritted teeth.

"Thought it was family supper." Lyla comments from the doorway.

"Well, as far as I'm aware, we're all Winstons here." Ellie says and Willow pulls the roast out of the oven, careful to avoid eye contact with anyone.

"I'm not." Abel pipes up and that breaks the tension somewhat.

"We'll make you an honorary Winston." Piper says, throwing an arm around his shoulder.

"Is that a title you really want?" Willow asks with a raised eyebrow and all her siblings ignore her, setting the table with cups and side dishes. Ellie produces a large bottle of wine, setting it by her mother's plate. They sit and pass the roast around, joking and laughing loudly.

"And then guess what he said." Ken says, tears rolling down his cheeks. Abel is laughing too hard to get it out so he gestures to Piper, who looks at his sisters and mother.

"Well I guess that makes two of us then." He whispers and the boys roar in laughter again.

"I don't get it." Willow says flatly and a hint of a smile tugs at the corners of Ellie's mouth.

"Cause, like, gay sex… Two of us… They both… Nevermind." Abel says, shaking his head. Willow smiles smugly.

"Your father would've laughed." Lyla says quietly and both Willow and Ellie look at the bottle of wine, nearly gone. Abel looks at her, surprised.

"Yeah?" He asks, startled.

"He had a funny since of humor. They both did. Jax and Opie." She clarifies and Ken and Piper exchange looks.

"Yeah, that's what the club says." Abel says, his knuckles white as he grips his glass tightly.

"Did they tell you about Tara?" She asks him and Ellie and Willow look at each other, wide eyed.

"A little. My mom talks about her sometimes. Said she saved my life more than a couple times." He says and for some reason he puts his hand over his stomach. "That she was a good mom."

"The best." Lyla corrects him. "Better than all of us. She was a great mom. She loved you and Thomas more than anything. She protected you with all her might. She reminded me of your grandma Gemma sometimes. Did your mom ever talk about Gemma?" She prods.

"Only a couple things. Like the fact that she was a little bit crazy, but she would kill for her family." He says and Lyla gives a humorless snort.

"She did kill for her family." She says broodingly and Ellie gives Willow a panicked look.

"Hey mom." Willow says hurriedly. "Abel has that picture of Thomas and I too. That one where we're sleeping."

"Of course he does. You use to play together." Lyla says quietly and they both stare at her in amazement. Willow knows that she knew Abel as a baby but she had no idea they were that close.

"I don't remember this." Willow says, looking at Abel then her mother.

"I do." Ken and Ellie say at the same time. Piper is staring at his mother, jaw slightly open.

"When your father was in prison, Abel. Opie had avoided it, Tara had just had Thomas, and I had just had you Willow… Tara would drop Abel off when she went to work and Gemma was busy and I would put you and Thomas in the crib. You'd sleep for hours. Abel would watch over you two. You were so protective of her, of your brother…" Lyla trails off and Abel glances out the corner of his eye at Willow. She's staring at her mother, dumbfounded. "You even took baths together." Lyla says breezily and at this, Willow goes pink.

"I'll kill you before I let you show anyone those photos." She threatens and Lyla just smiles.

"I have other ones." She says quietly. "Of you and your father Abel." Abel's head snaps up. "Go get the albums, sweetheart." Willow stares at her mother in astonishment.

"The leather ones?" She asks lowly and her mother gives her a look. "Sorry, we just don't open those up. Ever. Last time Ellie tried, you two got in a fight so bad that I'm pretty sure dad rolled over in his grave." Lyla gives her an incredulous look and she puts her hands up defensively. "Really mom, if anyone has a more fucked up family than us, it's him."

"I can help." Abel says hurriedly, getting up. Willow waits till they're in the hall to smack his chest.

"What are you doing?" She hisses.

"You're not exactly subtle." He responds. "You and Ellie planned this, I knew you had when I saw the bottle of wine. What are you two doing?"

"I'm not telling you." Willow crosses her arms defiantly.

"Fine." Abel says with a shrug. "I don't give a damn about those albums." He leans against the wall with a raised eyebrow. Willow appraises him with narrow eyes, then says coolly,

"We haven't seen these albums in a long time, alright? We'd like to see some of them."

"Alright, glad to know." Abel says, bowing to her and moving aside. She stomps up the stairs, scowling. She enters her mother's room and easily kneels by the bed, reaching under it and pulling out a long, wide box. She removes the top with a moment's hesitation. Abel peers over her shoulder.

 **AN:** Review and give me thoughts, comments, questions, concerns, and dislikes or likes. I would love feedback!


	11. Chapter 11

Inside is a white garter, some pressed and dried flowers, a black knitted hat, a pink baby hat with the reaper on it, and several heavy rings. Willow briefly runs her hand over the black hat. She lets the rings dangle from her fingertips before carefully setting them back down. Her attention turns to two large, leather bound books and she gently picks one up and hands it to Abel.

"Careful." She says needlessly. Abel sees how painstakingly cautiously she handles the albums. He has no doubt that he is carrying one of her most valuable possessions. He tucks it under his arm. She heads back downstairs and he follows. When they walk in, silence falls. Abel sets his on the table and notices how greedily Ellie is looking at it.

"This one first." She says, gently running her fingers over the cover then pulls it open. The first picture is of a man on a bike. He has a thick beard and a black knitted hat. His kutte fits him comfortably and he's clearly looking at something else, distracted. Abel knows it is the same man in the mug shot at the club, but this picture is different. The essence, it's somehow warmer. The man in this photo looks capable of being a father to four kids.

"Your mother took that." Lyla says quietly and Abel jumps. "Tara, not Wendy. She just snapped it randomly. Said it was so him. She wanted to remember him like that."

"He never smiled for pictures." Ellie mutters, her fingers already moving to flip the pages. There's more, of nearly the same picture. Him on a bike, almost always not looking towards the camera. It makes Abel's stomach twist, thinking about the woman behind the camera, seeing exactly what he sees. His mother.

The next page has several men in it. Willow looks at him, her eyes wide. She doesn't mean to point out his father but somehow when she lifts her finger, he's beneath it. Abel leans forward and stares, jaw slightly open. These aren't the club photos, formal and few.

The picture shows a younger Chibs and Tig, there's Jax, Opie, a young Mexican guy, a man with crazy hair and a beard, an old man with an oxygen tank and narrowed eyes, and a man with white hair staring into the camera. All are standing next to bikes.

"That was right after we got everyone out of prison. Tara and I were discussing that we wished we had more photos to tell you, Abel, who everyone was. She came to the club the next day with a camera. It's Chibs, Tig, Jax, Op, Juice, Bobby, Piney, and Clay." Lyla explains.

"Clay… My grandpa." Abel says, a touch of wonder and hardness in his tone. Lyla nods.

"My grandpa." Willow says quietly, pointing to Piney. Abel looks at her with surprise in his eyes.

"He was great." Lyla says quietly. "He loved these kids, even though he had his own demons to fight. Took Pipes in like his own." Lyla says and Piper is staring at the photo with a closed expression.

"Your grandpa Clay killed my grandpa." Ellie says suddenly, watching Abel's reaction. He jolts up straight and stares at her in horror. Willow smacks her under the table but Ellie appears not to notice. Abel looks back at the photo then at her, mouth opening and closing silently.

"He…" He says weakly, looking around the table like someone would refute it. "No…" Lyla simply turns the page. These photos are happier, though the tension still hangs in the kitchen.

It's Lyla and Tara, smiling with their arms around each other's waists. They look young, happy. In the next they're sitting on a picnic table with babies on their laps. Abel recognizes the dark blue hat. It's tucked away in Thomas's baby book. His baby blue one is there as well. Next to Thomas, in Lyla's lap is a little girl in a plain onesie, with a pink reaper hat.

"You were the runt of all of us." Ken says, elbowing Willow, who scowls at him.

"Just because you fatties were all like 7 pounds and I was only like 5 doesn't make me the runt!" She protests.

"You still are the runt." Ellie mutters, flipping the page. Abel almost shoves himself away from the table at the image that confronts him. It flashes him back to his early life, his first life, a life that haunts his dreams.

The smile is the most familiar. That's what he remembers best. Then it's the eyes, the warm hazel ones. He forgot how they switched from green to brown and back again. He forgot how she used to hug him with all her being.

"Mom." He whispers and all the Winston children look at him, startled. He takes no notice. He is drinking the picture in as though he is dying and it will save him. His mother, Tara, is hugging him and beaming up at the camera. He is still young, but he's smiling too.

The hands are what he stares at longest. Those hands saved his life. They saved him. Again, he reaches for his stomach, feeling the familiar scar that one mother caused and the other healed. Her hands, that held him and fed him, carried him and changed his diaper, washed him and wiped away his tears. This was his mother and everything that he had forgotten is here.

 **AN:** Questions, concerns, major moral dilemmas? Please let me know and review!


	12. Chapter 12

"Abel…" Willow says softly, drawing his out of his daze.

"Sorry." He says instantly.

"I'm sorry, this was a bad idea." Lyla says, going to shut the books. Ellie looks up, panicked.

"No, no." He says quietly, preventing her from closing it. "I just forgot how… Beautiful she was. I want to see more. I want to see those bathes." He jokes weakly and Willow makes a face. When her mom picks up the next page, she shoots him a grateful look.

Each page is something new. It might be a photo of him and Thomas. It might be a photo of his father; always looking like whoever took it had to sneak the camera into position. The photos are peppered with stories from various members- a shot of Piper sitting on Opie's bike eating ice cream prompts a telling of the time that he dripped ice cream onto the seat and Opie joked that it was sticky for months afterwards.

There are small moments, like Willow and Piper laying on the kitchen floor, giggling and covered in what looks to be yellow frosting. Laughing, Ellie reminds them that the frosting was meant for cupcakes that they ruined. Sometimes they tell him stories of his childhood that he had forgotten- that he loved a certain park or that he was fearless of the bikes at the club, always touching them despite warnings not to do so.

"You were a stubborn child. Always wanted to go your way." Lyla says with a warm smile. "You and Willow are a lot alike in that way." She closes the first album and pulls the next one towards her. Abel notices that Willow's fists clench on the table, though she herself doesn't seem to notice. He understands the second the photo album opens.

The first photo is her father, gently holding her. Willow doesn't want to look at it but she can't help herself. She knows every detail of the picture- the couch is brown and the cushion is stained a sort of purple, from Piper and grape juice. The picture above them, a black and white print of a Harley, is slightly crooked. There's a bottle of Southern Comfort on the table next to them, the rum just below the label. She's wrapped in a blanket of ducks, lined with green satin. She knows everything, because she has spent days looking at the photo.

It's the first photo she has with her father. The first time he ever carried her into the house and sat down with her, looked at her without the hospital surrounding them. The first time she was ever home, with him. More pictures follow, flipping by as Ellie looks. There's him asleep on the couch, holding her. Her, sleeping with her reaper hat. A professionally taken picture, her sleeping on her stomach with his kutte on her back. Him lifting her high into the air. Everyone photo is a testament to a good father who lived a short life.

Willow knows she won't cry at these pictures. She cried herself dry at them when she was 11 years old and there had been a father daughter dance at the school and the cruel girls had laughed when she told them what dress she wanted to wear. They had taunted her with reminders that she didn't have a father. Her mother had asked if she wanted to ask Chibs or Tig or Rat- any of them would have gladly taken her without a second thought. She had played it off, stolen the albums when her mother went to the studio for the night, and cried herself to sleep with them in her arms. She hadn't cried over them since.

She doesn't realize that she's clenching her fists so tightly until Abel gently touches one. Her brothers and sister are so distracted, pouring over a photo of their father that they don't notice. She looks at him, startled then relaxes her hands. Little crescents are stinging on her palms. She stretches her fingers.

"It's hard." Abel says, a statement and not a question. She nods, rubbing her palms. "My mom has pictures too, but the album is on a shelf. We don't have as many pictures as you, but lately it's harder and harder to look." Willow doesn't say anything and thankfully Ken gets his attention by showing him a picture of Jax's bike.

"Well, that's all of them." Willow says, when Ellie finally closes the album on the last picture, one of all 4 kids perched on a railing in Charming, squinting into the bright sunlight. Ken and Piper side by side, both with mischievous smiles. Ellie, holding Willow close and looking excited to be trusted to hold her baby sister. Willow knows it was the last time all four of them were with their father. Not a week later, he was dead in jail.

"Lyla, thank you so much." Abel says instantly. "I really appreciate you taking the time to show me all that."

"Of course." She says listlessly, staring at the closed albums with an odd expression. Abel thankfully doesn't press her and instead looks at the guys.

"I suppose I should be saying goodbye." He says and something funny stirs in Willow's stomach, though she forces it back down.

 **AN:** I know you guys can probably guess what I'm going to say, but review? Follow? Fav? Tell me what you love, hate, made you laugh, cry?


	13. Chapter 13

"What?" Piper asks, startled. "Goodbye?"

"I'll probably leave tomorrow morning. Be back to my mom and Tommy before they worry too much." Abel explains. Ellie sneaks a glance at Willow, who's watching with an impassive face. She marvels inwardly at her sister's ability to completely mask her emotions.

"I thought you would stay longer." Ken says and Abel shrugs.

"I found out about my dad. Enough, I think. I'm sure that you are all leaving some of his bad stories out. The pictures are great." He says.

"I can make you copies." Lyla says automatically, shaking herself out of her thoughts. Abel shakes his head.

"No, it's ok. Tommy isn't as curious as I am about SAMCRO. He's more content to study and play lacrosse. He doesn't try to dig photo albums up like us." He looks around the table and smiles slightly when he notices that Ellie has a protective hold on the albums.

"You have to at least stay till tomorrow night." Piper insists. "Zaneta will throw a fit if she hears that Jax Teller's son was here and didn't come to family supper." Abel looks surprised.

"He's not part of the MC and it's family supper." Willow says idly, picking at her nail polish.

"He's family." Lyla says sharply, looking at her daughter.

"Why does it even matter to you, you'll show up for 10 minutes and complain the whole time, then ditch out." Ken says harshly and Willow glares, standing up and pushing her chair back with a loud noise.

"Why would I stay and get interrogated about every last aspect of my life? I get yelled at for wearing too much eyeliner. I get yelled at because my shorts are a little too short. I get yelled at for talking to one guy just a little too long in the courtyard at the mall. I get yelled at for everything!" She says hotly.

"Then don't do that stuff!" Ken tells her, annoyed.

"What, don't live my life?" Willow spits, rounding on him. "Stop acting like I'm some innocent little flower that you have to protect!"

"Then stop acting like a child!"

"I'm not a child! I'm a damn adult in the eyes of the law! I hate that simply because I have some stupid outlaw for a father, I can't be normal. Because of who my father is and I hate him for it." She says harshly.

"You hate your father? Really?" Lyla demands and Willow stands tall in the face of her mother, unfazed. "Then what's this, Willow Winston?" She asks, grabbing Willow's arm, spinning her around, and pulling up her shirt. Abel has a chance to see the black ink of a tattoo spanning her ribs before Willow rips the shirt back down and stares at her mother, furious.

"Don't touch me." She hisses.

"Then don't say you hate the man when you have that tattoo." Lyla says and Willow looks down, but not before Abel see the tears in her eyes.

"I could walk out right now." She threatens. "I could leave this goddamn place and never look back! I could go anywhere and not be Willow Winston, poor Willow Winston, the daughter of a dead outlaw! I WOULD LEAVE AND FORGET EVERYTHING THAT IS SAMCRO!" She bellows, striding out of the kitchen and slamming the door.

"What in the hell?" Piper demands and Ellie rolls her eyes.

"You idiots are smothering her." She says matter-of-factly, cleaning up plates and putting them in the dishwasher. Both her brothers stare at her incredulously. "Oh, you have been and you know it." She says, with an eye roll.

"How so?" Ken asks gruffly.

"She's 18! She should be smoking at the park and kissing her boyfriend between classes, sneaking him in to have sex when you two are off with crow eaters and mom's at the studio. She should be trying to sneak into clubs in Stockton and dancing on bars in tiny mini skirts. She should be stealing alcohol and getting trashed with her best friend in motel rooms, stumbling home hung over and craving shitty breakfast food." Ellie says and Piper and Ken look scandalized.

"If she ever does any of that, I'll kill her." Ken says and Ellie smacks him.

"That's what I was doing and look where it got me." She says indifferently.

"What, bringing a WBR home?" Piper sneers while Ken roars in rage. Ellie blows him a kiss.

"Speaking of which, I'm going to relive my teen years and go have sex with a biker in a shitty motel room. I'll see you all for family supper tomorrow." She says breezily, leaving a fuming Ken in her wake.

"Clean this up." Lyla says tiredly, gesturing to the still dirty kitchen. "I have a headache, I need to lie down." The boys wait till she's left the kitchen before starting their rants.

"I cannot believe Ellie was acting like some slut in high school. And she thinks it's ok for Willow to act that way?" Ken demands.

"We can't just let any guy be all over her. We're protecting her, she's just too stubborn to see it." Piper tries to rationalize.

"Exactly. There are too many girls these days that get hurt by guys. We're just making sure that doesn't happen. And what if she went to one of those clubs and got drugged or raped?"

On and on the discussion goes, them coming up with more reasons why Willow should listen to them. Beers are cracked and the dishes sit, unnoticed. Finally, Abel gently butts into the conversation by loudly setting his beer down on the table. They look at him.

"It's pretty dark. Shouldn't we find Willow?" He points out and they look surprised that she hasn't wandered back.

"I'm too fucked up." Piper admits, looking at the half empty bottle of vodka. Abel stands.

"I only had a couple beers. I can go get her." He offers and Ken shakes his head, standing.

"She's our responsibility." He says, swaying dramatically. Abel catches him and puts him back in the chair.

"Don't let her hear you say that." He says quietly, but Ken and Piper don't appear to notice. "Any place I should look?" His question goes unanswered, as Ken and Piper are pouring shots for a toast. Abel grabs his keys off the counter and heads for his bike.

 **AN:** Did you love it? Did you hate it? Did you laugh or cry and stare at your computer screen impassively the entire time? Guess where you can tell me? (Hint, it's in a review!)


	14. Chapter 14

The night air clears the last remaining haze that the alcohol had given him as he drives around Charming, trying to figure out how far Willow could have made it since her outburst. He rides around long enough for him to wish he would've grabbed his sweatshirt before he sees something. He isn't able to slow down in time, so he has to turn around and come back, wondering if it was just a trick of his imagination. He guides his bike down the narrow road and sees it wasn't.

Willow is curled up on the ground in front of a large black gravestone. One quick glance at the name and the reaper on it confirms Abel's suspicions. He shuts the bike off and gets off. Willow makes no move to acknowledge that he's there. He pretends to read the stone, but that can only take so long before he has to look down at her. She's watching him, still curled up like a cat.

"How'd you know I'd be here?" She asks, not blinking.

"Lucky guess, really. Caught a glimpse of someone on the ground in a cemetery, took a stab in the dark… Literally." He says and Willow's eyes flick towards his bike before back at him.

"My brothers send you?" She asks and he nods, sitting down on the rapidly cooling ground.

"They were a little wasted, so I thought I should try to get you back in one piece." He says.

"I can walk." She says, getting up stiffly.

"I'm sure you can but I'll need your help to get home." Abel says casually and Willow rolls her eyes.

"It's Charming, you'd figure it out eventually." She says and he looks up at her with a disarming smile.

"But how can I resist the chance to have a pretty girl on the back of my bike?" He flirts and Willow ignores it, turning to look at the grave. Her fingers rest on the top, absentmindedly tracing some pattern. "You have a tattoo?" He asks, to break the silence.

"Saw that, did you?" She asks bitingly and he nods.

"Can I see it?" Abel asks softly and Willow, without looking, lifts up her shirt so he can see. It's the rough handwriting of a man, a scrawl mostly. "Willow is the best thing to ever happen to me." Abel reads. "She is my saving grace and my whole world. Protect her. Tell her I love her and I always will. I love you, Willow Jocelyn." Beneath the words is a black crow, it's wings spread protectively.

"It's the note my father left in my crib when he went to prison." She explains, brushing her fingers over it gently. "One second he was promising to love me, the next he was six feet under and I was fatherless."

"Do you come here a lot?" Abel asks her quietly and she shakes her head.

"This is the first time in like 5 years. I used to a lot when I was little. Ride my bike over here on the weekends and have a quick chat with dad about my week. Then I got older and I realized that the only words that are true on this damn thing is fearless brother." She says and the bitterness has crept back in her tone.

"Why tonight then?" He asks and she shrugs, turning her back on the stone and folding her arms.

"To say goodbye to him." She says and again, the words spill out before she can catch them. "I'm going to college. Not Charming Community College. Actual college. UCLA. My brothers don't know yet, my mom doesn't, the club doesn't. They're going to flip when I tell them. They don't want me to go anywhere they can't reach. That's why I'm trying to get everything to calm down." She explains and Abel's face is very still.

"So that's why you're trying to break their hold on you." He says quietly. "So that you can go off to college."

"It's not working." Willow says ruefully. "Every time I try to get a little further, they close ranks around me and it's a little harder to escape."

"It's out of love." Abel says and Willow snorts, sick of hearing those words repeated to her.

"You want to know what club love is?" She demands. "It's this gravestone right here. Do you want to see how many more there are?" She points over her shoulder, where a large oak tree hangs over a row of graves. Abel walks towards them and a combination of the streetlights and the moon make it possible to read the names of two gravestones, side by side.

Tara Grace Knowles, Devoted Wife and Mother. Jackson Nathaniel Teller, The Pride of your Family and Name. Side by side, even in death. Abel feels his hands start to shake as he realizes what the graves are, whom they belong to. Somehow he never expected that they would be here. It makes sense, that his father would be buried in the same place as his best friend and soul mate.

"No." With numb lips, Abel kneels, running his fingers over the reaper craved into his father's gravestone. He feels the dates that show his father's birth and death. A lifetime between that simple dash, all the memories represented there. He feels the flowers craved on his mother's gravestone, feeling some sort of peace that she still has beauty here, even in death.

"I'm sorry." Willow says quietly, behind him. Her hand rests hesitantly on his shoulder. "I forgot that you probably haven't ever seen them before. I forgot that you didn't grow up here. I'm sorry." Her words die off when Abel doesn't respond but rather keeps running his fingers over the gravestone. She feels guilty that her temper has gotten the best of her, again.

"I didn't know they were buried here." He says and his voice sounds funny. "I don't know where I thought they would be, but I didn't know it was here." Willow waits, her hand still on his shoulder. He stands abruptly. "I need to get you home." Willow says nothing, but takes one of his hands. He looks at her in surprise.

"Your hands are shaking." She explains. "You can't drive. I'll drive us back."

"You can drive a bike?" He asks, this revelation taking his mind briefly off his parents' graves.

"Of course I can. I learned when I was younger, mainly because it would cause the guys to flip out when I got on a bike and drove it around the yard." She says with a mischievous tone and Abel can almost picture Willow, her blonde hair flying behind her, on a bike as Tig and Happy chase her, screaming for her to come back before she crashes.

"Just give me a second." He says gruffly, walking away from the graves and back to his bike. Willow lags a little bit behind, wondering if she should be grateful that she didn't get left behind. He hands her a spare helmet and she has to make a joke to break the weird tension.

"Always got one handy? Have girls on the back of your bike a lot?" She teases and that manages to coax a smile from him.

"Always hoping for that at least." He says, getting on and revving the engine. Willow slides on easily behind him and leans forwards, clasping her hands around his waist. Out of habit, she rests her head on his back and they exit the cemetery for home.

"Thanks for the ride." She says, as she lets them in the kitchen. She wrinkles her nose at Piper and Ken passed on the living room flower. "Wanna sleep on the couch?" She offers and he looks surprised.

"Won't they flip out if they find out I'm sleeping in the same house as their precious baby sister?" He points out. She makes a face.

"They like you well enough. Besides, I just think it's best you stay with someone tonight." Her tone is suddenly a lot softer, a little bit broken. "Trust me, I know what seeing your parent's grave does." She hands him a blanket and with a smile, turns for the stairs. "Sleep tight." She says over her shoulder, as she walks up them. Abel wraps himself on the couch and Willow does the same.

However, both their thoughts remain in the cemetery and neither gets much sleep that night.

 **AN:** This chapter was hardest to write, because I bawled during the finale at the sight of Tara and Opie so close together in death and I cried even harder at the end, when I knew that's where Jax would be laid to rest... Bonus points to anyone who can name the song from which I borrowed the words on Jax's grave (also a reason to review, since you should all know that's what I love) Also, a special thank you to Mrssilvers, whose review made me so happy, I fell out of my bed and scared my roommate.


	15. Chapter 15

"Jesus Christ!" Piper's yell startles Willow awake and she runs downstairs, wild eyed and messy haired. Piper is standing over the stove, holding his hand, glaring at the pan on the stove. Willow grabs an oven mitt and grabs the pan off the hot surface, moving it before the scrambled eggs inside can burn.

"Run it under cold water!" She orders Piper, gingerly maneuvering the pan onto the table. He does as told, whining the entire time.

"What the hell is going on?" Ken asks, stumbling into the kitchen, rubbing his beard sleepily.

"I have two older brothers that need to move out and learn how not to grab hot pans." Willow snaps.

"I was trying to make eggs." Piper says sadly and Willow throws her hands up, hurling the oven mitt at him.

"Can I go back to bed?" She demands, as Ken eats the eggs straight from the pan. Piper, hand still dripping, joins him. They both ignore her and she rolls her eyes, heading back for bed. Abel is watching from the doorway, amused. She stops dead at the sight of him.

She's never seen him with such little clothing before. He's in boxers, the plain, plaid kind that every guy has a pair of. His legs aren't as wide as she thought they were; the pants give him that look. Likewise, he isn't as stocky as she had thought. In his thin, flimsy white tee shirt, she can see that his torso is lean. His hair is messy and his eyes have none of Ken or Piper's hangover.

His eyes flicker towards her and she's aware that she's in nothing but underwear and a very large SAMCRO tee shirt. She runs a hand through her hair automatically, feeling for a hair tie on her wrist so she can try to tame it. However, Abel's gaze doesn't linger. He just looks back at her brothers with a chuckle.

"How do they survive without you?" He wonders and she shrugs, inching past him and hurrying up the stairs. When she comes back down, arms full of homework and scholarship applications, she sees that the boys have moved on to making bacon and shakes her head, settling in the living room to work.

She can't focus for too long. She keeps glancing up at the sound of Abel's voice, each time hoping he doesn't notice that she's paying him mind. He never does, because he's sitting at the table, watching Ken and Piper cook, laughing at how they have no idea what to do.

She wonders if this is what it would have been like. If she had grown up with him. Would he have been in her kitchen a lot of mornings? He's only a couple years younger than her brothers. His brother is her age. Would they be in classes together? Would he tease her like her brothers did, make sure she wasn't kissing a guy in the deserted gym during lunch periods? Would they be close friends, the kind that spend every day together and think nothing of it?

Her mind wanders, with nothing to keep it in check. It wanders to Abel picking her up from school, yelling at her and Thomas to hurry up. Thomas, shoving her out of the way and snickering, her cursing at him. Her brothers and Abel starting a bonfire in their backyard, curling up and drinking a couple beers, laughing. Abel standing up for her when the rich kids decide it's time to give her hell about her mother and father once more.

"Wills!" Piper yells and she snaps out of it.

"What?" She asks irritably, pretending to be very engaged in something in her English textbook.

"When do you graduate?" He asks and her hands go cold. She looks at Abel furtively but he looks calm.

"June 7th." She says automatically, the date large in her minds eye. June 7th, the day she gets to escape and run away. The day that marks her freedom from Charming and SAMCRO.

"Oh, they do get done later than us. Tommy graduates the 1st." Abel says conversationally. Willow waits, panic stricken, to see if he'll spill her secret about college, but when the conversation moves to talk of family supper tonight, he goes with it easily. Willow lets her breath out in a whoosh.

They get up to leave, discussing all the business they have to attend to at the club. Abel goes with and Willow leans against the couch, shutting her eyes and taking a deep breath. Camila texts her mid afternoon and inquires how her and Jordan are doing. She invites her over to talk about their weekends and Willow hesitates, knowing she could use this as an excuse to avoid family supper.

' _Sorry Cam, another night. SAMCRO supper tonight.'_

She sends the text and feels a wave of guilt instantly after. Despite Camila's cheerful text that they could catch up tomorrow at school, she knows her best friend is wondering why Willow would suddenly go to a club event willingly. Willow herself doesn't even know and it throws her into a weird mood all day.

 **AN:** Thank you to everyone for the follows, favorites, reviews, and all else. It's a very bright spot in my otherwise hectic and stressful days. I've tried to be consistent with updating this story, but I likely will not get back till Monday, as this weekend is Homecoming, which means it'll pass in a orange and black blur of stress. Leave reviews for me to come back to? Love you all!


	16. Chapter 16

She cleans the house, does laundry, sits down and actually cleans out her closet. She's packing her old, outdated clothes into boxes to donate when Ellie storms in. She stops amid the chaos, looking around.

"Was there a tornado in here?" She asks, picking her way to the bed and flopping down.

"Yeah, sweeping up all the shit I don't need." Willow says, trying to refold tee shirts and shove them back into a drawer.

"Good idea, getting rid of it all before college." Ellie says and Willow shoots her a look. "It is. You can't bring everything, but anything you leave is fair game for when the boys go into a rant."

"Thank you for calming my nerves." Willow says sarcastically. Ellie grins. "Where's Gavin?" She asks, switching subjects.

"Browsing the stores. He's trying to find a bulletproof vest before tonight." Ellie says casually and Willow snorts with laughter.

"At least he's smarter than the average biker." She admires and Ellie shrugs.

"Some days. Anyways, you better clean all this shit up and get dressed. Supper's in like an hour."

"I can get ready in like 20 minutes." Willow says dismissively, pondering if she should keep a faded but comfy pair of shorts.

"I just figured you'd want to look a little extra cute for Abel." Ellie says slyly then ducks out of the room when Willow starts throwing things at her. She's still annoyed when she walks downstairs an hour later. She knows the fact that her hair is straight won't go unnoticed by Ellie nor will the fact that she's wearing her more expensive makeup. Ellie, however, says nothing and just hands her the pie to carry.

When they pull up to Zaneta and Happy's house, Willow can't help the rush of nostalgia she feels at the sight of all the cars lining the streets, the bikes parked in a long row in the driveway. Gavin and Ellie are talking in low voices in front of her, but Willow pays no mind.

Inside is a riot of color and noise. Kids chase each other around, all while people holler for them to go outside. Women are heating up dishes in the kitchen, trading gossip and spoons, stirring salads while they discuss the town's current events. The men are scattered about the house, drinking beers and loudly arguing over what sports game to watch. Willow doesn't want to admit it, but this is home. She falls into line, accepting a knife and cutting the pie carefully.

"Willow, baby, good to see you." Tig says, putting on hand on her head as he tries to steal part of the meat and cheese tray.

"Oh, just take it and go, out of my kitchen!" Zaneta orders, shooing him off. He grins and takes it to the living room. "Willow, my dear." She says, rounding on her. "We're so happy you're here." She folds her in a hug.

"You know me, someone's got to make sure the rest stay in line." She jokes and Zaneta narrows her eyes at the sight of Gavin.

"I'm sorry baby but I think you're failing." She comments, before swearing and grabbing something that's smoking slightly out of the oven. Willow helps with all the other dishes, content to watch everyone around her, smiling at the women who've helped raise her and the kids she helped raise in turn. She jumps when someone puts a large hand on her waist, gently moving her to the left. She turns around, knife still in one hand.

"Whoa." Abel says, putting his hands up. "Just trying to get a paper towel. Bowen spilled some beer."

"Of course he did." A woman next to them grumbles, taking the paper towels and walking towards Bowen.

"He was trying to do a headstand." Abel explains and Willow rolls her eyes.

"Of course he was." She says, unsurprised. Abel just grins and takes the open spot the woman left, pulling the half cut apple to him. "I can do that." Willow insists, nearly done with her own apple.

"No, it's fine." He says, looking at the apple rather than her. "I'm pretty good at it actually. When Tommy was like 7 he got really particular about how you cut up his apples. Some days it was strips. Some days it was cubes. Some days you could have skin and other days you couldn't. My mom, she couldn't really keep up with what he wanted, so I learned to do it." He describes.

"You sound like a good big brother." Willow says, trying not to sneak a look at him. She sees him shrug out of the corner of her eye.

"I try to be, most days. That doesn't mean we don't fight. We fight a lot actually. I think sometimes I embarrass him. He's a smart kid and athletic as hell. He fits in with the same kids that I usually tried to punch." He admits and Willow snorts. "What?" He asks, amused.

"I just can picture it, two brothers, one with a Harley and the other with a sports bag." She says and he nods.

"That's how it was, my senior year. He rode the bus instead of riding with me on my bike. I was damn proud of it though. I don't think my mom would ever admit it, but she was proud of me too." He says, an odd look on his face.

"What's she like, your mom?" Willow asks curiously.

"Like these women, actually." He says, gesturing to the crow eaters with the knife. "She has the same 'I'll rip your face off if you look at me wrong' vibe. She's strong. She loves Tommy and me more than anything, I know that. She's just got her own demons sometimes. She does her best and it's usually more than enough. Except sometimes…" He trails off and Willow knows the feeling.

"Sometimes it isn't enough." She mutters, watching as her mother walks in and greets everyone with hugs and kisses.

"Why isn't it enough?" Abel wonders then sets down the knife and wanders off, leaving a perfectly cut apple for Willow.

 **AN:** Ok, I'm back to regular scheduled posts! Which means back to regular reviews hopefully?

An explanation for this chapter- I feel as though the show meant for us to remember that despite all Wendy's promises to protect those boys, she still chose the life in the club for a lot of years and I don't think that she would forget all the good things the club did and all the love she had for them. That being said, I see Abel as her child, with her attitudes and memories of Jax, whereas I see Thomas as Tara's child, hence his disinterest in the club. Agree, disagree, thoughts? I would love to hear what you guys think.


	17. Chapter 17

**AN:** So I tried to solve what I saw as a pretty large loophole- despite the ridiculous amount of women, we never see any kids. I tried to fix that by including kids of the club in my story. Any questions on who they are, just ask. A full explanation of what kid belongs to who will be given later.

She's ducking the toys that Raimundo and Autumn are flinging at her head while she tries to sort out the disagreement that has left Kalli yelling when her phone buzzes. Zane, ever the able fingered pickpocket, snatches it out of her back pocket. She whips around, Kalli still in her arms.

"Zane, give it back." She warns in her strict voice. He sizes her up, wondering what she'll do if he doesn't. "Do it, or I'll tell Zaneta and she'll smack you for misbehaving." She threatens and he tosses the phone back then tears off yelling,

"Guys! Guys! Some BOY is texting Wills!" She sighs as she leaves the bedroom and walks back into the living room and kitchen. Every head is turned towards her and even Kalli has stopped crying in her arms, looking up at her.

"It was from Jordan. You know, the girl that Bowen's sleeping with." She explains then glares at Zane. He bolts outside before she can punish him for tattling on her. She hands Kalli off to Brooke before Bowen grabs her elbow and steers her into the bathroom and locks the door behind them. "You better not be peeing with me in here." Willow says instantly.

"I don't 'ave ta pee. Give me yer phone." Bowen orders and Willow takes a step back, frowning.

"Why?" She asks suspiciously.

"What did Jordan text ya?"

"Why do you care?"

"Willow!"

"Jeez, she just promised to bug me until I told her the answers to the history test this week, why are you being crazy?" She questions and Bowen runs his hands through hair, leaning against the sink.

"I'm not crazy." He protests and Willow folds her arms, raising an eyebrow. "Maybe a wee bit. Ok but hear me out." Willow sits down on the toilet and gestures for him to go on. "Before dat day we fucked and ya came, she called me like once a day. Texted me nonstop. Always tryna figure out where I am, what I'm doin', when she can see me next. It was fine, I was gettin' laid. But after that day? Nothin'. Nothin' at all." He says, wildly gesturing with his hands.

"Maybe she doesn't like you that much." Willow mummers and Bowen shakes his head.

"Nah, that can't be it." He muses, gnawing on his knuckle. Willow rolls her eyes and leans back.

"Stop acting like no one has ever ghosted on you before, Bo." She says and he looks at her.

"No one has!" Willow sighs and puts her head in her hands. She remembers vividly how Bowen came to Charming, a transfer from the Belfast charter that needed time away from a crazy ex wife and her even crazier new husband. She had just turned 16 and was proud that she had a car and could drive. He was younger than Ellie but older than her brothers and she got drunk on Halloween and kissed him. He had pushed her off, laughing, saying that maybe one day.

She had half believed him too. Half believed that he looked at her like a potential girlfriend, not like the little sister. It took her till Christmas to realize that he was screwing every crow eater within reach. She wondered if this was what having a broken heart was like, how heavy it felt when he grinned at her easily. Eventually it went away, once college and all the other drama of school distracted her. Then one day he gave her a ride home and suddenly he was Bowen again, just another overprotective asshole from the club.

"Maybe you could text her first." She suggests and he looks as though she has suggested cutting off a vital limb. "Girls like when you make the effort."

"I could invite her over ta supper!" He says brightly and Willow shakes her head, patting his cheek.

"Baby steps dumbass. Text her first." She advises, unlocking the door and exiting the bathroom. Abel walks by at the moment and glances at her and a thoughtful Bowen and raises an eyebrow.

"What do I say?" Bowen calls and Willow shrugs.

"Start with hey." She says back.

"Lady issues?" Abel asks and Willow grins.

"You missed it. They were fucking the day you got here." She says then Zaneta's loud voice announces it's supper and they have to run to the table before they get trampled. Willow reflects on everyone around the table, the kids squawking and the men bickering. She wonders why she was so mad at all the people here when they're the ones discussing her graduation party, asking what desserts she wants and the colors of the balloons.

She smiles when she sees Ellie and Gavin discussing going to different rallies this summer, the pros and cons of each one. Ken and Piper don't look ready to murder anyone, so it's a small miracle. Since Abel's here, she's not the focus of questions so she spends her time making faces at the little kids, pretending to be innocent when the moms tell them quiet down.

After supper is done, dishes are washed and the alcohol comes out in full force. The adults migrate to the back patio, lounging and drinking, talking club business. The kids race up and down the quiet street on bikes, scooters, skateboards, anything with wheels, whooping as the sun sets.

Willow finds a quiet corner in the living room, sinking down in a comfy armchair and pulling out her phone, catching up on all her text messages and social media. She's engrossed in an article about how to grow your hair three inches in three weeks when someone flops down on the floor next to her. She looks up, half hopeful it'll be Abel.

Instead, it's Bowen. He tosses her his phone without looking and she catches it, setting her own side. His conversation with Jordan is pulled up and Willow skims it briefly. There's not much to read; both sides are incredibly short and one worded, mostly 'yeah' and 'ok'.

"Now what?" Bowen asks, laying on a pillow and looking up at her. Willow tosses the phone back.

"Well, it depends. What do you want from her?" She asks.

"A decent shag." He says hopefully and Willow throws a pillow at him. He tucks it under his head.

"Well, if there's one thing I can tell you about Jordy, it's that she's smart. She's not a stranger to this shit and I'm sorry to say it but I may have told her some of your tricks. If you want more sex and nothing else, tell her that. If you actually want to take her to Ireland, tell her that too." She tells him and he broods long enough to finish another beer before popping up and heading for the fridge to get another one. Willow resumes her article.

 **AN:** 2 guesses as to what I'm gonna say here... (If you guessed review, you're correct.)


	18. Chapter 18

"Is three inches of hair really worth rubbing mushed bananas in your hair for three weeks?" Abel asks, making her jump. He's reading over her shoulder with a bewildered expression. "If so, girls are crazy."

"It's not real." Willow tells, half annoyed that he managed to sneak up on her and half annoyed that her heart is racing and not from the surprise. "It's just something someone made up to see if people would follow it." He looks pensive, running a hand through his own hair and sitting on Bowen's abandoned pillows.

"Still, that would be a lot of bananas." He says and she rolls her eyes.

"What are you doing inside? Shouldn't you be outside with the rest of the MC, talking about your dad?" She asks, drawing her legs up to her chest.

"I'm just a little sick of talking about him actually." He muses, not looking at her. "I've been talking about him nonstop since Thursday and I reckon I need a little break. Too much of a good thing, you know?" But something in his tone makes Willow think it hasn't been a good thing. "Tell me about you instead." He says and she looks down at him.

"What about me?" She asks curiously, wondering his angle.

"I don't know, all of it. I feel like I saw you grow up through those photos albums and yet I don't even know your birthday." He says and she smiles.

"September 13th." She tells him and he twists to smile at her.

"April 30th." He tells her and she nods.

"I can't sing." She says, it coming off her tongue easily, something inconsequential. "I can't dance either, which is why I could never be a stripper. I don't like being late. My favorite color is green and favorite season is spring. I'm type A. It drives Ken and Pipes nuts cause I have to have everything organized just so. I played soccer when I was little but I hated it. I always wanted to be a figure skater before someone explained that we live in California. I can bake because I like exact measurements. I like to run. Sometimes I think I could outrun the club and Charming. I'm a morning person, but only after coffee. I've lived in the same house for as long as I can remember. I have no memories of my father." She stops at the last one, it tearing its familiar hole in her heart.

"Who the hell is a morning person and likes to run?" Abel demands and Willow is grateful that he doesn't press her.

"Alright then, your turn!" She tells him and he leans back, hands under his head, grinning.

"Alright fine. I can sing wonderfully in the shower but my dancing is terrible. My favorite color is red and I like summer the best. I try to be on time but I'm type B so that doesn't happen. I like making things but I hate measuring stuff so it's usually shit. I wanted to be a firefighter when I was little. I hate mornings and running, because I'm not insane. I have a heart condition that I take medication for and I was born premature." He rattles off and Willow feels a rush of gratefulness that he's as open as she is.

"When did you get your bike?" She inquires and a dreamy expression crosses his face.

"The day after I turned 17. I had been saving up my entire life, literally. Got a job at 14 and saved every penny. My mom helped out too, even if she won't ever admit it. I picked her out in the store a year before I got her. The day I got to walk in there with my money and ride out on that bike…" He trails off.

"It's a pretty bike." Willow compliments and he looks at her with a funny little grin, eyes twinkling.

"You know, I've had hundreds of girls tell me that and ask for a ride. But hearing that from you? I'm complimented beyond words." He says, a touch of teasing in his voice and she uncurls one leg to kick him. He laughs, pushing her foot away from his face. "I'm being honest! You're the first girl to know what she's talking about when it comes to bikes!"

"I know." Willow says proudly, thinking back to the times when she was little and had asked endless questions about the bikes. T.O. had been the one to get fed up with it and had picked her up, taking her outside and setting her in front of the bikes, pointing out what made different models distinctive, what customizations had been added, all the different handlebars and their names. It had become a game between her and the others kids, identifying different bikes as they rode past, making the adults laugh.

"So what do you want to do with your life?" He asks and she automatically checks to see if anyone is in listening range. All the adults are outside, egging on Ken to wrestle Gavin, so she's clear. She looks back at Abel, who's watching her with bright eyes.

"I want to major in this thing called Behavioral Evolution." She says and he raises an eyebrow. "They call it the Ecology, Behavior, and Evolution major at UCLA. It's all about why we do what we do. It's a lot of math and chemistry stuff." She explains. He makes a face.

"Sounds like hell."

"Actually, I love those two subjects, so I think it'll be fine." She says, with a little dismissive shrug.

"And let me guess, you want to understand where in evolution we went wrong and created biker gangs." Abel points out and Willow keeps her mouth shut. It scares her that he can see through her that well. "I don't blame you. I'd want to understand it too, if I was smart enough for it. You want to understand what's wrapped up in your DNA. I just accept that it's there." He says and she can feel that the topic is veering into unsafe territory so she brings it back.

"What about you? What do you want to be?" She asks and he shrugs.

"I'm good enough for a mechanic. Everyone assumed that's what I'd do, after school, since all I've ever wanted was a bike. Took a couple courses at a community college, but I really fell in love with welding there. I like it. Told you I am a little bit bad with numbers, but I'm pretty good with computers, so anything like that I can handle. Not sure where I'll go or what I'll do." He says.

"So what's your plan after this?" Willow asks, trying to sound disinterested even though her stomach is in knots.

"Head home for a little bit. Tommy's gonna graduate soon. I should be around for that. After that I want to ride the coast, maybe go up north to Washington. Head over to Sturgis and if any place strikes my fancy on the way, settle there and call it good." He details.

"It sounds like a good plan." Willow admits.

"Not as good a plan as college." He tells her and she bits her lip.

"At least you can tell your family about your plan." This time it's Abel who rolls his eyes.

"Are you kidding me? I've been here 4 days and I can already tell how much these guys love you. Do you really think they'll be mad at you for being smart and going to college? That's a good thing Wills, not something you need to be ashamed of. I'm sure if you explained it to them they'd be more than happy to send you off." He says and the same tightness takes over her chest.

"You don't know, you're not part of the MC." She says and his eyes go cold again. He sits up with a shrug.

"True." And with that he gets up and leaves. Willow rubs her eyes until she sees spots.

 **AN:** So I'm always blown away at how many people read this story, but I would really love to be blown away at how many reviews, follows, and favorites it gets... Hint Hint. But really, tell me what you think, you guys are great!


	19. Chapter 19

"I told you not to do it." Ellie says matter-of-factly, icing Ken's face. He's glaring at Gavin, who's seated on a stool and watching them evenly. "I've told you a billion times, don't try to fight guys that are bigger than you."

"We weren't supposed to be fighting, we were supposed to be wrestling!" Ken protests.

"Is that why you told a jab at his ribs?" Ellie demands sharply and he bows his head, wincing when she takes the ice away to check the swelling.

"He retaliated." Ken grumbles and Willow snatches the ice away before Ellie can swing at him.

"Ok, maybe everyone in here should shut up." She suggested. "Ken, you're an asshole and stop trying to deny it. Ellie, stop being pissed off. You knew what was gonna happen and you let it, so you're not any better. Piper, quit snickering like an 11 year old. And Gavin, no offense, but you're just as bad as Ken." She rattles off and her siblings sulk in silence. Gavin, however, looks at her with something like amusement.

"I wonder who would win in a fair fight." He says aloud and Willow whips around to look at him. She's never heard him say so much. "Ken versus me. No cheap shots, just a straight up bar brawl."

"No!" Willow yells, trying to get in front of Ken, who's standing up, a manic glint in his eyes.

"What we fighting for, my sister's honor?" He mocks. Gavin gives an indifferent shrug.

"Pretty sure I took that the first night we fucked and how loud she screamed my name in that bar bathroom." He mocks and with a yell of rage, Ken takes a swing at him. Willow throws her hands up and stalks out of the kitchen.

"How's it going in there?" Lyla asks her and there's the sound of breaking glass. Willow flops down with a sigh. "I'll be sure the boys repay you for the damage." Lyla promises Zaneta, who waves a hand.

"What are they fighting about?" Tig asks curiously.

"Ken's pissed that Gavin's having sex with Ellie." Willow says, sounding bored with the whole thing.

"Does that kid really not understand what happens in relationships?" Rat asks, amused.

"Considering he's never been in one for longer than the five minutes it takes for him to have sex, no." Willow says and that startles laughter out of them. "I don't really want to clean up the mess. Can I go home?" She asks her mother, who nods and kisses her head.

"I need the car to get your brothers home." She tells and Willow brightens.

"Can I drive Piper's bike home?" She asks hopefully.

"No." Several voices say firmly at once and she pouts.

"I've got it." Abel says, getting up.

"Headed out?" Chibs asks him. Abel nods.

"I'll stop at the club tomorrow, before I leave." He promises and Chibs nods. It feels like a dismissal, so Willow squeezes her mother's shoulder and takes one last glance at the kitchen before following Abel to his bike. He hands her a helmet and some driving glasses.

"Oh, I'll just hide my face." She promises and he grins.

"No, I wanna see this side of Willow Winston." He says and she stares at him, unsure. He gestures to the bike.

"Wait, you want me to drive?" She asks, finally realizing what he's suggesting. He shrugs. "And you don't mind riding bitch?" She asks and he grins.

"If you don't lay us down somewhere, I won't even complain. C'mon, when's the last time some guy actually gave you permission to drive a bike?" He goads her and she straps the helmet on, swinging a leg over the bike.

"This would be the first." She says and his eyes widen before she starts the bike and revs the engine. At first she's fearful of tipping it, struggling to balance it with her weight and Abel's, but soon the familiarity of the rumble of the engine takes over and she heads for home the long way, not wanting to give this up. When she pulls into the driveway Abel releases his grip on her and gets off.

"Wow." He says, taking off his helmet and looking at her.

"What?" She asks, a little defensively.

"I've never had a girl be that comfortable driving my bike." He says, the same easy grin on his face.

"So a lot of girls drive your bike?" She asks and for some reason this makes her stomach twist into knots. He shrugs, starting to tell her about the time a girl nearly laid them down but she turns and walks away, not in the mood to hear it. She's so focused on getting into the house and away from him that she doesn't realize that the front door is splinted, kicked in. She takes a step back, looking at it in confusion. Abel is there in an instant, pushing her behind him, gun up and ready.


	20. Chapter 20

She's so busy wondering where he got a gun and where he had been hiding it that she almost forgets to follow him into the house. He enters, flipping lights on as he goes. The kitchen has several pots on the floor, as though someone has swept anything on the counters onto the floor. The picture frames in the living room are also on the floor and 'slut' and 'whore' are spray painted on the walls.

She sticks close to Abel as he finishes sweeping the first floor. Thankfully, those are the only two rooms affected. The upstairs is completely untouched. Willow is carefully picking up the picture frames, mindful of broken glass when Abel grabs her upper arm and hauls her up. She looks at him angrily and nearly takes a step back in shock.

Gone is the easygoing boy with his smile and twinkling eyes. His face is drawn and closed. His eyes are hard and a little bit wild. He looks like someone that would have no problems shooting anyone he found in the house. He pulls Willow out of the house. There's no chance of her driving this time; it's all she can to do to hang on as they speed back.

At Zaneta's, Abel talks to Happy and Tig about what happened, as Willow explains to Lyla. Lyla rides with Tig on his bike back first and when Willow is finally allowed to drive her siblings and Gavin home, the entire MC and some crow eaters are in her house.

"It's not bad." Lyla observes calmly. "Ellie, sweetheart, can you put that stuff away in the kitchen? Wills, pick up the pictures. If they're broken, put them on the table. I think we have this paint in the basement." She keeps talking to Happy, trying to calm him down. Willow does as told then slips upstairs and collapses in bed.

Her alarm goes off, making her bolt upright, looking around in panic. Her room is still slightly messy from her purge but her backpack is in its spot on her chair, filled with everything she needs. She lurches to the bathroom, brushing her teeth and tying her hair up. She throws on shorts and a tee shirt that says 'reaper crew' on it but she's too distracted to care.

She races downstairs, where her mother is studying some documents intently. Willow stands in the kitchen, looking around, bewildered. The pans have been returned to their spots. The broken frames are in the garbage, a stack of pictures on the counter. The words in the living room look faded, as if someone has scrubbed them.

"Mom." Willow says loudly and Lyla looks up calmly.

"Good morning sweetie. We're out of bread, so I'm sorry but there's no toast. I just got some cereal though." She offers and Willow just looks wildly around.

"How long did I sleep?" She asks and Lyla ponders it.

"Well you were in bed at about 9:30. I didn't want to wake you. I know you've been so stressed about school lately." She tells her and Willow is surprised that she's noticed.

"I should have helped clean up." She says and Lyla shakes her head.

"Ellie and I had it well in hand. We scrubbed and talked. I think we both needed it." She muses and Willow gets a bowl from the cupboard.

"Do we know who did it?" She asks, trying not to think about the expression on Abel's face when he had pulled out that gun.

"Apparently that new girl I hired has a boyfriend who isn't fond of her new line of work. He took the chance to come over here and make his feelings known." Lyla explains and Willow resists the urge to throw her spoon.

"This is why men are useless." She mutters and Lyla looks up at the noise of bikes pulling up.

"Yes, here come the useless men, carrying our useless new door." She says and Willow rolls her eyes, gulping down her cereal before setting the bowl in the sink and hurrying towards her car. She throws a smile and a wave at her brothers and Quinn, pulling the new door out of the back of the van.

She hurries to her first class, still feeling like she's somehow on the wrong foot. She crams for her history test, regretting that she hadn't done more this weekend. She's hurrying to her locker when she hears a snigger. She freezes.

"Nice shirt." Some girl mutters, pushing past her and laughing with her friends. Willow grits her teeth and keeps walking towards her locker. She notices that several guys are staring openly at her. A couple even look like they're about to walk up to her but she throws her locker open.

"Rough day?" Camila's voice asks and Willow rests her head on her shoulder. "It's not even lunch yet."

"Someone broke into our house last night and wrote some pretty terrible shit on the wall." She says shortly and Camila gasps.

"Wills, I'm sorry, I didn't know. Is everything ok? Do they know who did it?" She asks and Willow shrugs.

"My mom has a pretty good idea. I'm just focusing on getting through these next couple weeks. Schools almost done, then I'm gone." She says fiercely, walking to class with Camila in her wake.

She explains the story again over lunch and is actually thankful that Jordan distracts them by describing in full detail her plan to ignore Bowen until he comes running back to her. Willow participates in the conversation when required but her mind is somewhere else, wondering why she's got a feeling that something bad is going to happen.

"Nice shirt." Someone calls as she exits the school and she rounds on them, furious. It's Abel, looking mildly confused at how angry she is.

"Sorry, I've been catching hell for it all day." She grumbles then hikes her backpack up and gives him a suspicious look. "Why are you here?"

"To make sure you go to Red Woody." He answers smoothly and she narrows her eyes.

"A simple text would have done." She informs him, heading for her car. Regardless, Abel follows her to Red Woody and she gets out of the car, fuming. "I told you! Four days here and they've already taught you to keep me on a leash! Pick Willow up from school, make sure Willow does as told, make sure Willow doesn't run off or misbehave!" She rages.

"Maybe I volunteered for the job." He teases and she's too mad to be flattered.

"Aren't you supposed to leave?" She demands and he nods, sticking his hands in his pockets and following her into Red Woody.

"Thought I should see this through." He says and Willow is going to ask him what the hell he means by that when she rounds a corner and sees it. Several guys are holding a man at gunpoint. Scantily clad women walk by, apparently unperturbed by the scene.

"What did you do?" She hisses, turning around and smacking him.

"He's the guy who broke into your house. We thought he owed you an apology." Tig says calmly and Willow throws her hands up.

"I'm sorry for my actions." The man says obediently. Willow nods at him then turns around and looks at Abel, suddenly realizing that the man she glimpsed last night is who he really is. This doesn't scare him, doesn't make him think the club is insane. This is where he fits in, she can tell by the wildness of his eyes and the way he looks so comfortable with a gun.

"Can I go now?" She demands, folding her arms and looking at Happy. He nods. She turns on her heel and strides out. "Oh, and try not to kill him while you're at it!" She yells, slamming the door. Ellie and Gavin are walking in the parking lot, talking until they see her.

"What's going on?" Ellie asks and Willow throws her backpack in the backseat with a little extra force.

"Oh, you know." She says heatedly. "Just our lovely uncles, forcing men to say sorry for calling us names."

"Again?" Ellie says, exasperated and Gavin snorts. "Well, give me a hug, Gav and I are leaving after this." She orders and Willow hugs her tightly.

"Stay one more day." She requests sadly and Ellie kisses her head.

"I'll be around more often." She promises. "But you have to agree that you'll tell mom and the club that you've gotten into college." Willow groans and slumps on her car.

"Fine." She grumbles and Ellie gives her another hug.

"Graduation is only a couple weeks away. We'll be back for that and your party." She says and Willow nods. "Well c'mon Gavin, time for you to see just how crazy my family is."

Willow settles at the kitchen table to do homework, spreading everything out and plunging in. She finally finishes, as the sky is orange. She stands and stretches, finding some leftovers in the fridge and reheating them up. She glances around, trying not to notice the fresh paint in the living room.

"Back to normal." She says quietly, as the timer goes off and her supper for one is ready.

 **AN:** Well you got two parts, mainly cause I'm too impatient to pull off leaving a cliffhanger and the last chapter was short and I really wanted to post this one SO you can leave me lots and lots of reviews since I'm so nice (but mostly impatient) pretty pretty pretty please? Like even if it's nothing longer than a favorite part or least favorite part or just telling me who you want to see more of... Thanks guys!


	21. Chapter 21

"Or we could just not have a party and not have to do any of this shit." Ken suggests, throwing unfilled balloons at Willow, who glares at him.

"I recall helping you at your party." She says icily.

"I recall my party having a lot more black and a lot less streamers." He grumbles and Willow kicks him.

"I am a girl." She says. "I like the streamers. So shut the fuck up and blow up balloons." Lyla chokes back a laugh.

"Whatever." He grumbles then brightens. "I heard from Abel today!" He announces and a half filled balloon slips from Willow's hands.

"What'd he have to say?" Lyla asks calmly, going through her list of things to do before this weekend's party and next weekend's graduation.

"Not much. Was just asking if the club had talked about going to Sturgis this year. Didn't…" Ken hesitates then plunges on. "Didn't dad and Jax go a couple times? When I was real little." He says and Willow is still.

"They did, actually. Ask Ellie, she would remember better." Lyla says tightly, making little boxes next to everything they need.

"Well, he just thought it would be cool to start the tradition up again." He says hurriedly.

"He plans to ride the coast this summer, then go there and keep riding till he finds a place to settle down." Willow says and both turn to look at her. "We discussed our summer plans." She says defensively.

"And yours are?" Ken asks and she's saved from answering in the form of Piper crashing through the kitchen, shouting. They're all on their feet in a second. He skids to a stop and bursts into laughter.

"What the hell Pipes?" Lyla demands and he holds up a hand, trying to control his laughter.

"Bowen." He manages to get out in between snorts of laughter. Ken raises an eyebrow. "Fucked up." He gasps, tears streaming down his cheeks in mirth. Willow sighs deeply.

"Let me guess. This is about Jordan."

"Well of course it is." Ken says, annoyed. "She's all he talks about. He never shuts up."

"Can I tell my story?" Piper yells and they all hush, looking at him expectantly. He grins and sits down. "So I'm at the club right?" And he launches into a full-scale explanation of his day, down to the minute. They listen as patiently as they can then slowly but soon start rolling eyes. "And then, right when I was going to see if anyone had seen the—"

"Ok Pipes, get to it." Lyla says impatiently and Piper sighs.

"Ok, long story short, Bowen was in the club, talking about how much he likes her and how he wants to fuck her again and that maybe she's his old lady and guess who's in the doorway!" He says excitedly and they all look at him blankly. "JORDAN!" He yells, clearly anticipating more of a reaction.

"And what'd she do?" Willow asks, scrolling through her guest list with a frown on her face.

"She just did this little smirk thing and said she thought she left a tank top here. Then she went and got it and walked right back out without saying a word to Bowen!" Piper says, looking like Christmas has come early.

"Good for her. Bowen needs to be told no a time or two." Lyla says approvingly and Willow nods.

"Isn't it hilarious?" Piper says and without waiting for them to respond closes his eyes. "I just keep replaying the look on his face when she walked right past him and didn't say anything…"

"At least she's learning." Lyla comments and Willow rolls her eyes.

"Yeah, and tomorrow at school we're going to have a full blown, 45 minute discussion about what exactly occurred and how long he looked at her and totally analyze what he meant and have a breakdown or two and then she'll tell us her new plan." She says glumly.

"All in 45 minutes?" Ken asks, amazed.

"Or less, cause I actually try to pay attention in the beginning of class." Willow says thoughtfully.

"Girls are crazy." Piper sums up.

"Don't ever forget it." Willow warns him.

"Not likely, when I'm surrounded by them." He grumbles and Willow throws a pen at him.

* * *

"So it worked then?" Jordan asks eagerly and when Willow nods, hoots, clapping her hands. "I thought it would!" She says gleefully.

"Do you realize that you're crazy?" Willow asks her pointedly.

"Yes." Jordan says instantly.

"Ok, carry on." Willow says, waving her hand and Jordan plunges back on with her plans to ignore Bowen and reel him back in. Willow listens halfheartedly. She agrees to whatever Jordan suggests and leaves most of the plotting to Camila, who's incredibly invested in it.

It isn't lost on Willow that she has no experience when it comes to dating. She's kissed a couple boys, sure. But to be in a relationship with one? She's never had it ever go that far. Either she ended it or the club did, her brothers being an ever-looming force in her life. They discouraged any guy from touching her and the ones that weren't scared of them were frightened by the sight of Tig and Happy, covered in scars and tattoos, sporting guns.

It never bothered her, till prom last year when the club had rolled up for pictures and scared the shit out of everyone involved. She had realized then that the only reason she had never tried to fall in love was because the only thing she found attractive was biker boots and a kutte.

Before she can stop it, Abel flashes into her mind, grinning and offering her a helmet, letting her drive his bike. She doesn't want to admit it but he's someone that she could handle. A biker that doesn't behave like one. One who says sorry when he is and doesn't when he isn't. But then, like someone has doused her in ice water, she remembers that night, the gun.

She tries to forget how he looked that night. She's seen so many guys go into the club and come back out, throwing the prospect patch away after realizing what it means. None of them could hack it and she assumed the same when she saw Abel. That's why she told him as much. But the man she saw that night could wear that patch easily, without doubt. And that revelation doesn't sit well with her.

 **AN:** I just want to let you guys know how thankful I am for all your amazing, sweet, kind messages and reviews. This is one of my first stories that I've put out there and to have people like it means the world to me. Please keep reviewing, following, favoriting, sending the link to friends who might like it, any of that stuff. It makes my day all the brighter!


	22. Chapter 22

"Are you ok?" Camila asks her, as lunch ends and they head back to class. Willow gives her a bright smile.

"Yeah, just busy with graduation shit. Got my party this weekend and then we finally graduate after that. Just trying to plan my shit." She promises and the lie appeases Camila for the rest of the day.

"Shouldn't we have less homework and not more?" Jordan complains, collapsed on the floor, surrounded by final project sheets and colored paper.

"This week is finals and the next week is book returns and last minute make up." Camila says dreamily. "Just have to get to Friday."

"Just have to get through Saturday." Willow corrects, sorting all her papers into neat stacks.

"But your party is going to be fun!" Jordan insists and Willow snorts.

"It will be the exact opposite. According to my mom all the Red Woody girls are coming and half the charters from here to Washington and Arizona are on their way. Anything to get drunk, right?" She says and Jordan looks up.

"That's where phase 2 of my plan starts." She says evilly.

"What in the world is that?" Willow asks, mildly alarmed.

"I'm gonna flirt with whatever guy there is hottest and Bowen is going to lose his shit." Jordan says confidently and Willow gets up, shaking her head. She sits on top of Jordan. "Ow, get off!" She protests.

"No." Willow says firmly. "Not until you promise not to do what you think you're going to do."

"What are you talking about?" Jordan squeaks, trying to fend her off. Willow remains steadfast.

"Promise me when you come to my party you will not do any of the shit you just told me." Willow orders and Jordan doesn't respond so Willow bounces up and down slightly.

"OW OW OW WILLOW FINE FINE I PROMISE I WON'T FLIRT OR DO ANYTHING STOP IT STOP!" She yells and Willow rolls off her.

"Why can't she?" Camila asks intriguingly.

"Because these guys aren't high school boys." Willow says automatically, her fingers picking up a piece of paper to hide how her hands are shaking. "They don't get jealous that you're flirting and try to win you back. They will start fighting each other."

"Fighting over me?" Jordan asks and Willow reaches over and puts her hand over her mouth.

"Jordan, this isn't funny." She says, trying to hide the panic. "They won't just fight, they will try to kill each other. It is one thing to be a crow eater or a sweetbutt and get passed around, but the club always decides where you'll go. Either Bowen is going to get pissed and swing at whoever you're flirting with and get beaten within an inch of his life or he's not gonna give a shit and you'll have to go to bed with whatever guy you made the mistake of talking to!" By the end, her voice has risen to a shrill pitch and both girls are staring at her.

"It's really that big of a deal?" Jordan asks timidly and Willow just continues folding the paper into a tiny square.

"She's actually not kidding…" Camila says slowly and Jordan looks at her. Willow doesn't. "Manny and his crew are like that. They don't just let stuff go."

"Ever." Adds Willow, throwing aside the paper and getting up.

"I'm sorry Wills, I didn't mean to upset you." Jordan says hastily and Willow waves a hand.

"I'm just gonna go to the bathroom." She reassures them and they watch her go. She knows they'll start talking about her the second the door closes, but she doesn't care. She sits on the toilet and puts her head in her hands and just breathes for a long moment. She has a deep desire to run. She walks out and starts gathering her stuff up.

"Where you going?" Camila asks instantly.

"For a run." Willow says easily. "Either of you two want to come?" The offer is nothing more than a formality. Camila doesn't run and Jordan loathes that Willow would rather run distance than sprint. They let her go without further harassment and when she gets home she pulls on spandex and a running bra, tying her shoes tightly. Then she sets off.

It's dusty for California in late May. She wonders how bad the drought will be this year as she heads out of town and down a highway. She doesn't have a route in mind, mainly because she knows Charming so well. She ends up at the bottom of a large hill. She stares up at it, wondering why her feet brought her here. The nervous flutter starts up again in her chest and so she starts to climb.

The top, where she stands, sweating and gasping for breath, has a good view of Charming; it's streets and small parks. She can see the high school and one of the elementary schools, alongside the local pool. She sits and watches the city as it moves before getting up and brushing herself off. She jogs home before it gets dark, passing the club in the process.

"What in God's name are you wearing?" Ken demands, barging into the house. Willow looks up from her supper.

"I went for a run." She explains as though it should be obvious.

"In what, your swimsuit?" He sneers and Willow throws her fork at him.

"Don't be an asshole just cause you can be. You go for a damn run in this heat. You could stand to lose a little weight. Maybe then you could actually find a woman to settle down with." She taunts and Ken makes a face.

"Why would I want to settle down?" He asks.

"Because when dad was your age, he had two kids?" Willow points out and Ken is quiet, searching the fridge for food. Piper comes in, talking loudly on the phone. He cuts it off and joins Ken at the fridge.

"So yeah, like I was saying, I think he'll start prospecting here pretty quick." Piper tells Ken and Willow bolts upright.

"Who, Abel?" She asks sharply and both brothers turn and look at her oddly. She regrets it instantly and tries to look disinterested, but her hand has been played. She takes a big bite of meatloaf to hide it.

"No, this guy, Nick." Piper says slowly. "Our age. Left Charming for a little while after graduation, but he's back now." They carry their conversation and leftovers to the living room, fighting over the remote. Willow puts her dishes in the sink and hurries upstairs.

She grabs a book and tries to read, but her mind is racing. She tries all of her old tricks; tightening and relaxing her muscles one at a time, solving as many math problems as she can in one minute, even sorting through all of her clothes and making them color coordinated. Nothing works. She's still stuck on why the idea of Abel prospecting made her feel sick and hopeful.

When she had heard someone was putting on the prospect kutte, her heart had stopped and her stomach flipped. Her breathing went irregular and she wanted to throw up and grin at the same time. She slouches in a chair and closes her eyes. She might as well think about it and then try to forget it.

It's startling easy to picture Abel in a prospect kutte. He'd wear it like a natural, layered over a tee or a long sleeve. It wouldn't hang on him like it does on some of the boys from school. He'd be a natural on his bike. He wouldn't be freaked out to be handed a gun or a crow bar. And of course, he would be a favorite among the crow eaters. That part doesn't sit well with Willow.

 **AN:** I love the feedback I'm getting from you guys, please keep it coming. Reviewing can be as simple as telling me what part you like best or as complex as leaving me a full detailed explanation of why you think Willow wanted to be a figure skater. Ready, set, go!


	23. Chapter 23

She shakes herself out of her musings on the elder Teller son when her mom gets home and yells for her to come downstairs. There's still so much to be done for the party and Willow knows that after a long day at Red Woody, it's better not to cross her mother.

"Go down to the club, that's where we need to set up the tables." Lyla mutters, looking over her bills, on half her attention on Willow.

"Mom, I said I really didn't want my party at the clubhouse." Willow says quietly and Lyla doesn't appear to hear. Willow sighs and goes to find a large sweatshirt to cover her sports bra. She drives to the club, fiddling with the zipper on Piper's ratty old SAMCRO hoodie. She's surprised at the flurry of activity at the club when she arrives. She walks up, admiring their hard work.

"Like it?" Bowen drawls, throwing an arm around her shoulders. She observes the tables.

"I'll be impressed if they're all still standing Sunday morning." She says cynically and he gives her a confused look. "If I recall correctly, you like to smash them using people." She informs him and he waves a hand.

"Remind me why you couldn't have Harley colors like Ken and Pipes." Tig complains, helping Happy string bright blue and purple streamers.

"Still your little girl, Tiggy." Willow says with a wink. He grins and she wanders around, impressed at the amount of work that's been done. Then she enters the bar and sighs. It's fully stocked, almost to the point of bursting. A couple crow eaters are cleaning, chatting. They smile at her and she can't muster up a smile back.

"What's wrong?" Rat asks her and she looks up at him. "I can see it in your eyes. You've got the little frown thing." He gestures to the crease between her eyes and she rubs it, frowning.

"I'm fine. Everything looks great. I'm excited." She tries to reassure him and he rolls his eyes.

"The only thing you're excited for is to be done with school." He tells her. "And it bothers you that your graduation is an excuse for the club to invite everyone down to celebrate." He says and she shifts from foot to foot. "Listen, I didn't know your dad like the rest of the guys here but I knew him well enough to know that he loved you. You represent the fact that this club can do right by him. That we can help the people that got hurt in that damn war…" He trails off and Willow is looking at him curiously.

"What war?" She asks quietly and he looks at her.

"Point is, they're here to celebrate you. Try to remember that. And if you can't, at least smile pretty and pretend to." He tells her and walks off, taking a beer off of the counter. She chews her lip, tucking this new information into the back of her mind for later. She makes sure everything else is done before driving home.

"How'd it look?" Lyla calls when she lets herself into the house.

"Like a couple drunk bikers tried to take a decorating course and instead failed miserably." She calls back and that gets a weak chuckle from her mother. Willow wanders to the back porch, where her mother is relaxing.

"Was it really that bad?" She asks, as Willow sits in a chair and draws her knees to her chest.

"Honestly, no." She admits with a grin. "TM just looks a little odd with girly colors everywhere."

"I can't wait to see." Lyla says happily and they fall into silence, watching as the sun sets.

"Mom, I have a question and you're not going to like it." Willow says, purposely not looking at her mother.

"Are you pregnant?" Lyla demands and Willow stares at her, incredulously.

"No!" She responds hastily and Lyla sits back.

"As a mom I have to ask. Ok, hit me with this terrible question."

"Were you and dad ever happy?" Willow asks and the reaction is exactly as she predicted. Her mother clenches the armrest tightly, her mouth hardening into a flat line. But after a second, she slackens somewhat.

"Yes." She says firmly. "You may not think it Wills, but we really were. When we got married and when I was pregnant with you… I hate to admit it, but we were happiest when the crew was in prison. Your dad loved that my pregnancy got me out of work. That was what he wanted, honestly. That's why we couldn't make it work, in the end. He wanted me to quit forever and I couldn't. But yes, we were happy. We were very happy; happy to have you and the other three, happy that our families blended. We loved you." She chokes up and wipes away a tear.

"Rat said dad was killed in a war." She says quietly and Lyla looks at her, startled. "When I was at the club today."

"A war… Of sorts." Lyla says slowly. "Willow, you have to understand, that from when Abel was born to when Jax died, the club was constantly in danger. You were constantly in danger. It was all Tara and I could do to keep the six kids safe between the two of us and Gemma. There were always people that wanted us dead, wanted to hurt us. A lot of people died in those five years. It was a war zone and your dad was caught up in it." She admits and Willow nods. She knows most of this; she had picked it up during time at the club.

"Rat also said that I represented the way the club had done right by dad." She says and Lyla is quiet for a long moment.

"You do." She says finally. "You're strong, you're smart, you're funny, and you're in one piece. His sons are Sons; his daughters are fiercely independent and loyal. The club made sure Opie Winston's children grew up without fear or hatred of the reaper. That's what he would've wanted."

"Would he have wanted me to go off into the real world?" Willow asks before she can help herself.

"Of course." Lyla says nonplussed. "What, were you going to live here forever?"

"I just thought the club would want me close by." Willow admits, disconcerted into honesty. Lyla shrugs.

"I don't think they'd be opposed. But at the end of the day, you're your father's daughter and you will do whatever you think is right." She looks at her sadly, reaching out and intertwining their fingers. "You're so much like him sometimes I think it's a miracle. How can you act so much like a man you hardly knew? Your nature…" She grows quiet, studying the sunset so she doesn't have to see Willow wipe away a tear.

"I'm sorry I've been so distant lately." Willow apologizes and she means it. Despite their turbulent relationship, Willow knows she should tell her mother more. She takes a deep breath. "It's because I've decided I want to go to college."

"Willow, that's great." Her mother says automatically. Willow's eyebrows shoot up in surprise.

"Really?" She asks, not wanting to get her hopes up even though her heart is in her mouth.

"Where?" Her mom questions and Willow looks down at her hands, picking at her nail polish and scratching it off.

"Uh, UCLA." She admits quietly after a long pause.

"Oh, Willow… How did a pornstar and an outlaw raise such a smart girl?" She wonders, sadness in her tone.

"With a lot of help." Ellie comments, making both of them jump.

 **AN:** Ok, I'm likely going to cut back updates to Monday, Wednesday, Friday, since midterms are coming up and I will be in a flurry of panic the entire time. That being said, I love writing this story for you guys, so please leave me your thoughts, pretty pretty please!


	24. Chapter 24

"Ellie, we weren't expecting you till tomorrow." Lyla says in surprise, getting up and hugging her.

"Yeah, but I remembered how much of a disaster my party was and I figured that I should get here on Thursday so Friday I can do damage control." She explains, sitting down in front of them. "So you finally told mom?" She addresses Willow, who nods.

"You knew?" Lyla demands and Ellie rolls her eyes.

"She told me last time I was home. It was pretty easy to see that something was bothering her. That's why she was so touchy." Ellie says dismissively and Lyla glances at Willow.

"I thought it was just you being angry." She says softly and Willow gives a little shrug.

"It was both. Then Abel came and it was just a lot to handle." She relents and her mother shakes her head.

"Willow, how long have you known that you want to go to UCLA?" Lyla asks, looking to her again and Willow goes quiet.

"I applied this fall and got accepted." She says when Ellie nudges her and gives her an encouraging nod. Lyla's jaw drops and Willow plunges on. "I'm already signed up for orientation this summer. I'm living on campus, I'll find out my roommate sometime in June, and I've got a couple really good scholarships." She keeps talking, mostly to fill the silence. "I got a pretty good chunk of financial aid from the government; turns out that having a dad that died in prison makes college affordable."

"How did you do all this without me?" Lyla whispers and Willow flinches. Thankfully, Ellie saves her.

"Mom, we all know how to forge your signature." She says with an eye roll. "We learned before middle school. You're forgetting that Willow is the smartest out of all of us. If anyone is going to get into college without anyone knowing, it's her. You're just lucky she's telling you instead of just disappearing midway through August." She informs her and Lyla looks at Willow, hurt.

"I wouldn't do that." Willow protests hollowly, trying not to think about how that was her exact plan.

"Why?" Lyla asks and Willow flinches at how upset her mother sounds. "Why didn't you tell anyone?"

"Because I was so sure that you and the club wouldn't want me to go!" She bursts, the weight on her chest pressing down harder than ever. "Because it's always been about loyalty to the club and to this family! I thought the second that I said I wanted to leave Charming and go off and do my own thing, you and every Son would remind me that I owe my life to the club. The club raised me, now I need to pay it back and become a crow eater. I don't want to do that, I don't! I want to go to school and just be a normal girl." Tears spring to her eyes.

"How are you not normal?" Lyla demands, her tone rising slightly and Willow gives a bark of laughter.

"Normal girls don't know how to ride a 800 pound bike. Normal girls don't have to be careful of how they hug their brothers cause they're carrying guns. Normal girls don't get an escort of 10 guys to her first day of high school. Normal girls aren't raised on a damn porn set! I have never been normal, not since a couple guys beat my father to death in jail with a pipe!" She yells and Lyla reels back as though Willow has slapped her.

"Who told you that?" She asks, hands over her mouth, eyes full of tears. Even Ellie looks horrified.

"See mom, a normal girl shouldn't go clean up after her uncles and have them tell her things like that." Willow manages to spit, feeling her own tears start to well up. "I know that dad loved me. I know that. But that doesn't mean that what he made the club promise to do was good for me." She gets up and heads inside so her sister and mother won't see her tears.

"Someone needs to talk to her." She hears her mother say lowly to Ellie. They're still on the porch; unaware that Willow's window is open. Their words float up to her, curled up on her bed.

"She won't talk to anyone, trust me. You've engrained that too deeply in her. CPS would get called in a heartbeat if she told a therapist half of what she just told us." Ellie reminds her mother.

"I hate that she knows so much. It scares me. How in the world does she know all this?" Lyla says, bewildered.

"Jesus Lyla, do you even know her?" Ellie asks and Willow's surprised to hear her use her mother's real name. "She's Willow. Half the time she gets shit out of you and you've got no idea until it's three days later. She's so smart mom. She could read and write before she was four. She did my math homework when I was in middle school and she was just this tiny thing. She has a curiosity like no other and she's great at getting people to do what she wants. You can't hide shit from her. It's better to not even try."

"Has she really been looking at UCLA for that long?" Lyla asks Ellie, avoiding commenting on that topic.

"Yes." Ellie says instantly. "And you're an idiot if you think she won't go. So my advice is start working on a way to have the club handle this like men and not giant babies. She'll forgive you for anything and everything if you give her this." She suggests.

"I can't believe my baby is going to leave." Lyla says sadly.

"Don't worry." Ellie reassures her as motorcycles roar into the driveway. "You still have two more."

 **AN:** Sorry for the super short chapter; like I said, I'm getting so busy. I can write this whole story but I struggle to come up with ways to ask you guys to review, favorite, follow, etc. Irony? Anyways, please do all those things! I want to hear what you all think about the direction I'm taking Willow and the rest. Thank you for reading!


	25. Chapter 25

"Morning baby." Lyla says when Willow walks downstairs, dressed for school. "Want eggs?"

"No, I'm not that hungry." Willow says, grabbing an apple out of the fridge, wondering if her mom is going to bring up last night's discussion. She doesn't, just tips the eggs onto her own plate and sits down to read the paper.

"Your brothers want you at the club after school, if that's ok." Her mom tells her as she heads for the door.

"For what?" She asks, tensing up.

"To make sure everything is in place. You know how Pipes has the ability to fuck everything up." Lyla says and Willow snorts in amusement.

"Ok, tell them I'll be over right after school." She says and Lyla nods.

"Have a good day at school, I love you!" She yells as Willow leaves.

At school, everyone is celebrating. It's the last Friday of the year. Seniors only have classes Monday and Tuesday, while the rest of school is done Thursday. Willow wants to take Camila and Jordan aside to explain to them that she's told her mom, but classes are full of tests. Everyone is quiet until they hit the hall, where the noise rises to such a volume no teacher can control it.

"You're quiet." Jordan comments and Willow opens her mouth to tell them that she spilled her secret, but something stops her. She pops a slice of apple in and chews, buying her some time.

"Just thinking about my party." She says brightly. "Ellie got home last night, so hopefully she can keep everyone from destroying anything."

"I can't believe we're actually leaving this place so soon." Camila says, looking around sadly. Jordan and Willow stare at her incredulously.

"Do not tell me you're going to get sentimental over this school." Jordan says flatly and Camila shrugs.

"This is where I met you guys!" She protests. "This is the first school I've actually stayed at for a decent amount of time. I mean, it's been like the last four years of our lives and now we're going to leave it all!" Willow and Jordan stare at her blankly. Camila sighs.

"Quiz me on history." Willow orders and Jordan picks up the cards.

The bell rings and the entire school spills out into the sunlight, yelling and cheering. Willow follows the crowd to her car, laughing and joking with Camila and Jordan. They pile in, rolling down the windows and blasting the music.

"What are we doing after your party?" Jordan asks Willow, her feet out the window. Willow shrugs.

"I'll probably be cleaning up after the club." She says thoughtfully and Camila groans from the backseat.

"You're graduating! You have to party! It's like an unwritten law." She swears and Willow raises an eyebrow.

"Alright, where's a party?" She inquires and Camila is busy on her phone.

"I don't know yet, but I'll figure it out." She says confidently and Willow can't help but smile. She drops them both off, and then heads for the clubhouse, lost in thought about graduation. She pulls up and gets out, checking her phone to see if anyone's gotten in touch with her. She bumps into someone and looks up, startled.

"Sorry." She says automatically, taking him in. Short, dark hair, covered in tattoos, a thick beard and a prospect kutte. "Nick!" She says in surprise, recognizing him. He had been her brothers' friend in high school.

"Willow Winston." He says with a grin. "Damn, you sure grew up." She grins and shrugs. "This all for you?" He asks, gesturing to the club. She nods.

"Finally graduating good old CHS. Feels like it's taken 80 years." She complains, falling in step with him.

"Trust me, there's nothing better than leaving it." He promises and she laughs. "So how old are you?"

"18." She says, pushing the door open and stopping to appreciate the inside. There are a couple long tables for people to sit, the bar is set up to serve food and drinks, and everything is covered in her colors. "Wow, it looks good." She compliments and Ellie appears from behind the bar.

"Thanks, I told them no beer till it was done." She says and Willow rolls her eyes. "Want a beer Nick?"

"Yes." He says and she slides him one.

"Where is everyone?" Willow asks, looking around.

"Well, Rat and Happy are dealing with their kids. Apparently Rang and Cruz started a fight today." Ellie says, snorting in amusement. Willow shakes her head. "I sent the boys home to grab all your photo albums, so I'm sure they got distracted. And everyone else went on a run for TM." She sums up.

"Why'd you get left behind?" Willow asks Nick, who shrugs.

"Prospects don't ask questions, they just listen." He says and she acknowledges his point. They talk until Ken and Piper arrive, hauling several photo albums under their arms. The two leather bound ones are not among them. Willow and Ellie arrange the photos in order then stand back to admire their handiwork.

"I feel like it looks like I just magically appeared into the world as a two year old." Willow comments, running her hand over a photo of her with Popsicle stains down her front. There are no photos of her as a baby anywhere.

"I know. But mom would never let those albums out of the house." Ellie mutters and Willow leans against her.

"Even if she did, I wouldn't want them here. Those are for our eyes only." She says quietly and Ellie looks at her.

"Abel looked through them." She reminds her and Willow shrugs.

"Yeah, but isn't Abel in the same boat as us? A couple half siblings and a dead dad that no one talks about. He gets it." She says and Ellie looks thoughtfully.

"You heard from him at all?" She asks, trying to sound casual. Willow doesn't fall for it.

"No, but I think Ken has. They talked about Sturgis together." She says, forcing herself to keep her tone light.

"So he might be around more this summer?" Ellie asks and Willow looks at her, folding her arms.

"Why are you so curious as to if he's coming back here?" She questions and Ellie grins, kissing her head.

"Cause you two would be adorable together." She coos and Willow shoves her. Nick looks between the two of them.

"Who's Abel?" He asks and Willow ducks behind the bar so Ellie is forced to respond. She rolls her eyes and cracks her own beer.

"Old family friend. Cute old family friend." She says pointedly to Willow, who pops back up, making a face.

"How many times do I have to tell you guys, I'm not dating a biker!" She claims and Nick raises his eyebrows.

"What's wrong with bikers?" He asks.

"Yeah, what's wrong with bikers?" Ken asks, as he and Piper walk back in.

"I grew up with them." Willow says flatly. "I'm not dating a guy that reminds me of my brothers." They dissolve into arguing about whether it's weird or not.

"Ellie's dating a biker!" Piper protests.

"Yeah, and look at how you all lost your shit!" Willow exclaims and he waves a hand airily.

"Water under the bridge. Gav's a cool dude." He insists.

"He's Gav now is he?" Ellie asks, leaning forward to give him a look.

"We just think he should prospect for the Sons, that's all." Ken says calmly and Ellie flicks her bottle cap at him.

"Yeah, because leaving one club and joining another is such a great idea." She says sarcastically.

"We can make exceptions!" Piper decides and Ellie rolls her eyes.

"It's not happening. Get that through your head." She says and Ken throws his hands up.

"Why are women so stubborn?" He asks.

"Because men are stupid." Willow sasses, as the door opens and some of the club walks in.

"Well, hullo ta ya too Willow." Bowen says pleasantly and Ken and Piper laugh. "Be a good lass and get me a beer." He says to her and narrowly ducks her punch as she walks past him.

"Call me a good lass one more time and watch how I murder you." She says, voice dripping with sweetness.

"See you're happy as ever." Tig comments, handing her a beer and grabbing one for himself.

"Talk to me on Tuesday, when I'm officially a CHS alum." She sasses back and he chuckles. "By the way, the clubhouse looks great. Thank you guys." She addresses them sincerely.

"Appreciate it now, it's gonna be destroyed soon enough." Quinn says and Willow sticks her tongue out.

"How many charters did you invite?" Ellie asks curiously and Tig pretends to start counting on his fingers.

"No, don't try to count that high, you know you can't." Ken says and Tig flicks him off.

"It was an open invitation." Tig says and Willow frowns.

"But not everyone will come to my party right? I mean, will they even know who I am?" She wonders aloud and Chibs comes out from behind the bar to gently embrace her.

"Willow." He says seriously. "Almost every Sons knows who Opie Winston was." Willow looks at him, wide eyed.

"I had like 500 people at my open house." Ellie recalls fondly and Willow swears loudly.

 **AN:** I really love the idea of a ton of bikers in the clubhouse and Willow sitting in the middle of it all, just angry as hell. Please leave me thoughts or questions about what you think, how I'm writing the Next Gen, anything or everything! I want to hear it all. Have a good weekend, thanks for reading!


	26. Chapter 26

A loud bang startles Willow awake and she stumbles out of bed, into the hall, alarmed. There's no more noise so she stands at the top of the stairs, poised to go back to bed.

"Oh good, you're up. Your mom is making breakfast." Jordan says, appearing at the bottom.

"Why are you here?" Willow asks her blankly.

"Hullo Willow." Bowen says, sticking his head around the corner.

"I see you two made up." Willow says, sighing and rubbing her face vigorously. "What was that noise?"

"Ah, there might be sum, ah, wee problems." Bowen says sheepishly, scratching his head.

"Spit it out Bo." Willow orders, folding her arms and leaning against the railing, feeling like this will be a very long day.

"Ya know how Ken and Pipes 'ave a wee little bit of a mess in da garage? We tried ta move da grill." He admits and Willow holds up a hand. Parts of bikes, old shop projects, and more cover every inch of the garage Willow and her mother don't use to park their cars in.

"Say no more." She says tiredly. "Just don't upset my mom."

"Breakfast in 10 then." Bowen says brightly, darting back outside.

"Need any help?" Jordan asks and Willow flinches, rubbing her temples.

"Get me a large class of water and a lot of drugs please." She requests.

"Water and some Advil, on it." Jordan says and Willow sighs, heaving herself up to change. She comes downstairs to a noisy breakfast- her brothers and Bowen are arguing over who broke what in the garage.

"Is my car in one piece?" Willow inquires.

"Yes." Ken says.

"Then I don't give a flying fuck about it. Shut up." She scoops eggs onto her plate as Jordan snickers.

"Do you have your outfit picked out for today?" Lyla asks and Willow nods. "Does anything need ironing?"

"No, I've had the dress hanging in my closet so it should be ok." Willow says and Lyla smiles.

"Which dress?" Jordan asks curiously.

"You haven't seen it. It's new." Willow says and Ken and Piper exchange looks. "And don't you two even think about going and inspecting it, you'll ruin it and then I'll rip your heads off and stick them on spikes outside TM for everyone to see." She threatens. They stare at her, wide eyed.

"I should not have let Happy babysit you as a child." Lyla says with a sigh, pouring more milk.

"Are you running errands with me or him?" Willow asks Jordan as they clean up breakfast. Jordan glances at Bowen then shrugs.

"I'll come with you." She says nonchalantly.

"Good cause I need an explanation." Willow says, dragging her out the door.

"Hair at 4!" Lyla yells.

"I know!" Willow yells back. She backs out of the driveway then fixes Jordan with a stare.

"What?" Jordan protests.

"Explain yourself woman. Why were you with Bowen at my house?" Willow questions.

"He called me last night." Jordan divulges and Willow wonders how hard it must have been not to tell her and Camila instantly. "He said he was coming to get me and he pulled up on a bike. He took me out to that state park and told me that he's never missed a girl like he's missed me and how I'm the first girl he's gone after and that he doesn't know what he's doing in a serious relationship so I have to understand that—" Jordan rambles.

"Can we fast forward to the part that I'm actually asking about?" Willow asks her, parking at the nail place and getting out.

"Why are you being such a little shit today?" Jordan observes and Willow gestures wildly.

"Because a billion of my crazy uncles are riding into town today to congratulate me on graduating and then will drink themselves into oblivion and try to blow everything up. I'm a bit touchy."

"Fine, I'll do the short version." Jordan relents and despite that promise, it still takes all of Willow's manicure for her to tell how Bowen decided that he wants a relationship and for Jordan to agree.

* * *

"Did he specify what a relationship meant?" Willow asks, intrigued, admiring her nails.

"No but I'm sure we'll put a label on it." Jordan says confidently. Willow raises an eyebrow.

"You're so naïve it's painful." She mutters, headed to the next stop.

"Am not!"

"Good lord I never thought I would be so excited to see this place in my entire life." Willow groans, pulling into Red Woody. "Will you drive all this to the club? I'm sure my mom will drive me." She asks Jordan, who nods.

"Willow!" One of the girls shrieks the second she walks in. She's swarmed in an instant and finds herself in a chair, getting her hair curled and eye shadow dusted on. The girls chatter around her and Willow halfhearted listens, her mind on her party tonight.

She drifts off into a daydream about her party and how different it would be if Abel were there. She knows there's no way he would ever be there, but that doesn't mean the idea doesn't float through her mind. He would be in a full patch, over a tee shirt so he doesn't die in the California heat. Dark jeans, like the one she'd always seen him in. She wonders if he has tattoos. He has to, they always do. She's never seen him without a shirt on, but she assumes he would.

He would stand with the guys on the club, a beer in one hand, laughing. He would glance at her periodically as she hugs everyone, thanking them for coming. He would wink and walk over, teasing her that it looks like she's getting tired, but would go get her something to eat and drink since he knows she can't move.

"Whatcha thinking about Willow?" One girl asks, standing back and appraising her work.

"That I'm going to kill Ellie." Willow says honestly, hopping out of the chair and shaking her curls out. "Am I good to go?" Someone holds up a mirror and Willow admires herself, impressed at the restraint with the make up.

"Your dress is hanging in the office, your mom is walking in." One woman says and Willow nods, locking herself in. She's got a missed call from Ellie so she responds as she unbuttons her shirt.

"Wills." Ellie barks.

"What'd they fuck up?" She demands, shimmying into her dress.

"Nothing yet, but you should hurry up. People are showing up." She informs her and Willow nearly falls over. She checks the clock. 4:45.

"My party doesn't start till 5:30!" She protests.

"Tell that to some Sons." Ellie scoffs, hanging up. Willow swears loudly, grabbing her heels and running out.

"Mom! We gotta go!" She yells.

"Why?" Lyla asks, looking up from her computer screen in alarm.

"Apparently people are already there." She says and Lyla swears, giving orders as she shoos Willow to the car. They speed to the club, Willow strapping herself into heels, trying not to ruin her hair or makeup.

"Hey." Her mother said suddenly, parking. Willow pauses, already halfway out the door. "You look beautiful Willow Jocelyn. And if your father were here, he'd say the same. We love you, so much." Her mouth twitches up into a sad smile. "There's not a day in my life where you haven't made me proud."

"I love you too mom." Willow says honestly, leaning over and giving her a gentle hug. "I'm sorry I'm such a terror some days."

"Never, Willy-Bear." Lyla promises and they get out, walking into the clubhouse arm in arm. Ellie whistles when she sees Willow and both Ken and Piper burst into protest.

"You can't make me change, get over it." Willow says flatly.

"I think it's adorable." Ellie says, eyeing it. "Besides, a black button down shift dress is harmless."

"She looks like she's wearing a guy's shirt." Ken grumbles.

"That's the point." Willow says, kissing his cheek and going to greet the people arriving.

"I don't like her point." Piper says with a frown.

"I don't believe she cares." Ellie says, amused, going to kiss Gavin as he walks in.

 **AN:** I love that you guys love Willow. She's a little bit of the best of the people I love and I love that you guys love her as much as I do. Please keep leaving me your thoughts on this story, it really does make my day to see that people are reading this and loving it. And if you've never reviewed, this chapter would be an excellent place to start, hint hint...


	27. Chapter 27

Willow was right to predict that she wouldn't be able to move or eat anything at her party. She tries to inch towards food, but gets intercepted time after time by more bikers who bring a card, their own beer, and stories about her father. She has to greet all of them with a small smile and a nod.

"Thought you would want this." Someone mutters behind her, placing a glass of water next to her. She glances over her shoulder and Nick grins back at her. She smiles gratefully and gulps the entire glass down.

"Thanks." She says, rasping slightly. "I've never had to hug so many people in my life." Nick glances around at the crowd. It's mostly Sons and old ladies, with a couple people from Charming mingling around nervously.

"Interesting crowd." He observes, but Willow can't say anything else, as more people file in.

"How much time left?" She asks under her breath as Ellie arrives and shoves a brownie into her hands.

"Half an hour." Ellie informs, blocking her from view so Willow can devour the entire brownie in one bite.

"But I'm starving El." Willow complains as Ellie brushes chocolate crumbs off her face.

"Bright side, you look tiny in that dress." Ellie says cheerfully and Willow stifles a groan, her smile looking only slightly forced as she moves to hug the couple that just walked in.

"Ever seen so many bikes in your life?" Jordan asks Bowen curiously, looking at the parking lot of TM, filled with rows of bikes.

"Aye." He says casually. "Rallies." He explains when she gives him a look.

"I'M FREEEEEEE!" Willow yells, bursting through the club doors, arms in the air. Bowen and Jordan watch as she whoops, walking towards them.

"That bad?" Jordan asks.

"Wait till it's yours." Willow says, pointing at her. "Bo, the guys want you for cleanup crew. Jordy, what are our plans for tonight?" Jordan glances at Bowen's retreating back and Willow groans.

"I'm sorry!" Jordan says instantly. "But Wills, you know how important it is to be at these parties. You're the one who told me that these guys will fuck anything if their old lady isn't there." She points out and Willow gapes at her.

"First, you are not his old lady. Second, shouldn't that make you want to not date him? And third, do you even have any idea of what the club is like when they're drunk?"

"No." Jordan admits.

"It's terrible. It's awful. So don't try to tell me that you want to be here. And if you do, if you really, really do, you're more fucked up than I thought." Willow says flatly and Jordan folds her arms.

"I'm staying." She says flatly and Willow stops looking surprised and instead looks disgusted.

"Have fun with that being your life." She hisses, pointing to the clubhouse. "I hope you get knocked up and have his screaming children. He'll be in jail most of the time anyway, so you'll raise them. Have fun with this shitty life." She scoffs, turning on her heel and walking away.

"Where you going now?" Ellie asks as Willow scoops up her cards and family albums. The club members are trading garbage bags and beers, joking as they start to clean up the clubhouse.

"Home." Willow says, throwing the cards a little harder than necessary into a box. "Why the fuck are they even bothering to clean up?" She bursts suddenly. "There's no point, they'll just trash it tonight anyways!"

"Whoa, ok, I don't know why you're so angry, but please remember who I am and that I'm on your side." Ellie says, her hands up and Willow rests her head on Ellie's shoulder.

"Why the hell would anyone choose this lifestyle?" She whispers and Ellie leans back to get a better look at her face.

"I did." She reminds her.

"No you didn't. Girls fall in love with guys like their dads. We never had a chance. But girls that come from normal families that pick this? Insane." She mutters. Ellie glances over Willow's head and sees Jordan, smiling at Bowen.

"Ah." She says, understanding. She pushes Willow out from her, holding tightly to her shoulders. "Listen to me. Go home. Put on something short and slinky. Go to Oakland and sneak into a club. Have fun. You deserve it." Willow gestures wordlessly to her brothers and Ellie raises an eyebrow. "Yeah, like I can't handle them for a night. Go." She orders.

"I love you." Willow says honestly, kissing Ellie's cheek.

"I know, now go before they realize you're gone." She mutters and Willow bolts for the door, dodging Sons as she goes.

 **AN:** So Willow's grad party is roughly based on my own experience, though I didn't have bikers there. I know this chapter is short, which is why you're getting two in one day, but this website won't let me upload longer chapters- the screen just goes blank. So I'm sorry it's short and sweet, but click the next chapter button and if you really wanna make me smile, leave a review for both!


	28. Chapter 28

"Jesus." Gavin swears when Willow stumbles into the kitchen Sunday morning. Willow cracks an eyelid to glare at him.

"Not a word." She grumbles.

"Wow." Ellie says, fascinated. "You took my advice to heart, didn't you?" Willow flinches at her cheery voice.

"Lower volume." She requests, pulling a Gatorade out of the fridge and rummaging for a straw.

"What did you do?" Ellie asks gleefully. Willow frowns.

"I remember coming home and putting on the blue dress you got me. I remember Camila picking me up and us going to a party at Manny's house. I remember them taking us to a club. I remember a lot of whiskey sours. I do not remember coming home." She sums up.

"Damn." Gavin says, entertained.

"Hush." Willow orders, sucking Gatorade through the straw. "Ellie, find my phone while I curl up in bed and never move again."

"You're lucky our brothers are at the clubhouse." Ellie remarks and Willow groans, eating cold pizza.

"Speaking of that, is it still standing?" She asks.

"Yes, barely." Ellie says and Willow nods, impressed. "If you wanna clean yourself up, we're getting lunch at the diner."

"I'll pay you to bring me home the greasiest burger and fries." She says, looking up hopefully.

"You owe me a milkshake tonight before we leave." Ellie says and Willow flashes her the thumbs up, going back to curl up in her bed. She listens as her mom comes home then leaves to eat lunch with Gavin and Ellie.

She reflects back on the night through all the pictures she took- they're as blurry as her memories. She pauses on one, smiling slightly. It's an awkward angle, but it's clear that it's her and Camila in the club, Willow resting her head on top of Camila's, both grinning at the camera. She decides that moment is worth more than anything else, especially being at a party for the club.

The smell of food wakes her up from her nap. Her headache has been reduced from a pounding to a dull ache so she wraps herself up in an old SAMCRO sweatshirt and heads downstairs.

"Good afternoon Willy-Bear." Lyla says cheerfully, clearly amused by her daughter's hangover. Willow blows her a kiss and dives for the fries, dipping each one in honey mustard.

"How's the hangover?" Gavin asks and she nods, swallowing a large bite of hamburger.

"Better." She admits. "Are the boys moving yet?" Lyla checks the clock, which reads 1:16.

"No." She says confidently.

"Is anyone?" Willow asks and Ellie nods.

"Rat and Brooke were at the diner with the kids." She tells her and Willow narrows her eyes.

"Did you tell mom that they got in a fight at school?" She reminds Ellie, who sighs and nods.

"I talked to Brooke." Lyla reassures her. "I just think that Rang is having a really hard time with all of it. You know how bad his bad moods can be."

"Rang?" Gavin asks, confused.

"Rat's oldest, Mikey thought it was normal for everyone to be called an animal name when he was little." Ellie explains. "Cause his dad is Rat and Rat sometimes calls Brooke 'bumblebee'."

"Only when he fucks up." Willow interjects and Lyla chuckles.

"Anyways, his favorite animal was the orangutan and whenever you would ask him his name, he would say orangutan. But he couldn't really say it, so 'rang' was the only part you could really understand. Hence, Rang." Ellie sums up and Gavin looks more confused than he was before.

"Well, him and Cruz need to knock it off." Willow says. "I'm not gonna be there anymore to pull them off of people. And they're gonna suck Ryder into it next year, I can feel it."

"Hush, he's a good kid. You know Quinn keeps an eye on him." Ellie says and Willow shrugs.

"Yeah, they all keep such great eyes on their kids, considering half of them don't even live with their dads." She quips and Lyla gives her a cold look that shuts her up quickly.

"Willow that's not just the club, that's America." Ellie protests but Willow, having finished her burger and fries, retreats back up to her room for another nap to clear her hangover.

 **AN:** Hungover Willow is a lot like my hungover best friend... I like to think if I met a real life Willow I would get along with her. As promised, a second chapter, now leave me reviews upon reviews and tell me your thoughts!


	29. Chapter 29

She wakes up to Ellie lying next to her, flipping through stuff on her phone. Willow bumps her with her butt and Ellie cuddles closer, still immersed in her phone. Willow waits for an explanation but when Ellie remains silent, asks,

"Can I help you?"

"I want that milkshake." Ellie says promptly, shutting her phone off and grinning at her.

"Time?" Willow asks, trying to pull the blankets back over her head.

"4:27, so get up and dressed, Gavin wants to leave by like 5ish, because I'm having this before we go." Ellie declares and Willow slides off the bed, curling up in the floor. "C'mon." Ellie says, nudging her with her toe. "And look presentable, the boys are home."

When Willow comes downstairs, she hopes the braid and sunglasses will be enough to hide her hangover. She shouldn't have worried. Both Ken and Piper are slumped over in the living room, watching TV on a very muted level. Half empty bags of chips occupy their laps and beers on the tables beside them.

"That's so not going to help." She points out, gesturing to the beer. Neither says anything, but both raise their middle fingers. She rolls her eyes and heads to the car, where Ellie is already waiting. "When'd they get back?" She asks.

"Not even an hour ago. Mom went to the clubhouse and pulled them out. It was great. She says from the looks of things, we might have another batch of babies in roughly nine months." She jokes and Willow shakes her head.

"No thank you. I'm still recovering from when we had the twins, Omari, Zane, Isaias, Shani, and Lexi." She grumbles.

"Oh, my senior year was a wild time." Ellie says fondly and Willow heads to the ice cream shop. She and Ellie order milkshakes- Ellie, chocolate and Willow, vanilla- then sit outside and eat, watching cars pass.

"Do you think mom will tell the club?" Willow asks lowly, as a family walks into the shop.

"Yes." Ellie says calmly, scooping some into her mouth. "But it's not a bad thing. It isn't!" She insists, when Willow looks at her incredulously.

"You went like 10 miles to school. I'm going 5 hours. Do you see how they might flip out?" Willow says sarcastically and Ellie rolls her eyes.

"Willow, look at the club. They've been watching us since we were little. They were watching me when dad was in prison the first time and missed 5 years of my life. They watched me when dad died and they watched me in high school when I got arrested for smoking on school property and got about a billion curfew tickets. Did I piss them off? Yeah. Did Chibs and Tig threaten more than once to teach me a lesson? Yeah. But they never ever said I couldn't follow my own dreams, whatever they were. Stop being so convinced that the club is going to lock you in a cellar until you agree to be an old lady." She scoffs and Willow just stares at her, utterly flabbergasted.

"So your advice is what?" She asks, when she finally has her voice back.

"Tell them at graduation." Ellie says, as though she has this all planned out. "I know that they still list off where everyone is planning on going when they give you your diploma. If you don't think the entire club will come to your graduation, you're mental. Put it in there. Explain to them when it's done." The mental picture of the club starting a riot as she walks across the graduation stage flashes into Willow's mind.

"And how do you know they won't lose their shit?" She questions and Ellie slurps her malt.

"Willow. You've gotten straight A's since you were old enough to understand that they're the best grade to get. You're scary smart. Trust me, I don't think the club had any doubts about you being bigger than all this." And with a smug smile, she finishes her milkshake, slurping loudly and ignoring dirty looks from other customers.

"Bye! Love you!" Lyla yells out the door, as the motorcycle with Gavin and Ellie on it pulls away. "I like that she's around more." She says happily.

"Even with Gavin?" Willow asks and Lyla shrugs.

"If she's happy, I'm happy. Besides, I think it's high time I get a couple grandchildren." She says and Willow makes a face at the idea of Ellie having children. "I'm going to Red Woody to edit." She tells her, kissing her head. Willow waves absentmindedly, turning her phone over in her hand. She could easily call the school and tell them to change the notation next to her name from 'undecided' to 'UCLA' but she can't summon up the courage to do it.

She curls up on the couch in the living room, halfheartedly watching the show that Ken and Piper left on. Camila and Jordan are texting each other, rehashing each other's nights, but Willow isn't interested. She already knows- Camila and Manny dropped her off then had sex. Jordan spent the night next to Bowen then had sex. Typical stuff. She grits her teeth and dials the school's number.

"Hi." She says when someone picks up and she knows she sounds strangled. "This is Willow Winston and I'd like to change where I'm going in the senior graduation program. Instead of undecided, I'm going to UCLA. Thank you for changing that." She hangs up and flings her phone across the room, grabbing a pillow and screaming in it. She lies there, limp. She about jumps out of her skin when the phone rings. She answers, taking deep breaths.

"Hey Willow." Brooke's familiar voice sounds tired. "Can you watch the kids tomorrow? My dad is sick again."

"Of course." Willow says instantly. "Is everything ok?"

"Yeah, it's just that I had promised to watch the wild four and now I have to go. And you know there's no trusting Cruz and Rang with them." She says ruefully and Willow nods, though Brooke can't see her.

"Sure. When do you need me?"

"Just make them supper, but I'll be home in time to put them to sleep. That sounds good?"

"Sure." Willow agrees, already mentally fortifying herself. She loves the kids but she knows how much of a handful they can be.

"You're an angel. I love you. See you tomorrow." She hangs up and Willow bites her lip, wondering what to do. She takes a deep breath and heaves herself off the couch, going to pack for her last week of school.

 **AN:** Dun, dun, dun... Willow's gonna have to tell her family soon! Surprise, there's another chapter for you... So that means all of you that read, must review? Yes? I would love that.


	30. Chapter 30

As she races through the kitchen, grabbing a granola bar, she spots the note from her mother. She snatches it and runs for her car. She's reading it as she walks into school, eating the granola bar distractedly.

"There you are, I thought you were gonna be late." Camila comments as she slides into her desk.

"Almost was." She grumbles, crinkling the note up and throwing it into the garbage can.

"Why the face?" Camila asks.

"I have to babysit tonight, but mom gave me the world's worst chore." She complains.

"Which is?" Camila asks curiously.

"The club's on a ride so it's big laundry day, which means we have to go into the basement and get all of Ken and Piper's shit. And it smells." She whines.

"Why do you have to get it?" Camila asks and Willow raises an eyebrow.

"Do you really think my brothers are going to nicely agree to bring their clothes up?" She points out and Camila nods in acknowledgement. "T-minus…" She checks the clock. "7 hours until doomsday."

"Why's she so crabby?" Jordan asks Camila as they wait in a rowdy line to return their books. She looks at Willow.

"T-minus 2 hours till doomsday." Willow says sadly.

"What's that?" Jordan asked, intrigued.

"Washing her brother's clothes." Camila explains.

"It's not just washing." Willow says, exasperated. "It's that I physically have to go into the basement, which is little more than a man cave, and look around for dirty clothes. Some of that stuff has been down there for years. One time I found Piper's underwear from when he was 7." She says, disgusted.

"When was that?" Camila asks.

"Last spring." Willow says and both Camila and Jordan look repulsed.

"Are you still mad at me?" Jordan asks her quietly, as Camila returns her book. Willow pauses for a moment then gives a half shrug.

"If you want to be a crow eater, I can't stop you. I refuse, however, to stop telling you that it's an incredibly stupid idea and you're going to end hurt and with herpes." She says and Jordan smacks her.

"Are you going to survive this?" Camila asks worriedly, as Willow walks to her car, dragging her feet, her attitude worthy of someone headed to the gallows.

"No." She says glumly.

"If you don't call me 6:00 I'm coming in after you." Camila promises and Willow clasps her arm.

"You are truly my best friend. Wish me Godspeed." She says dramatically and Camila nods solemnly.

"You two are idiots." Jordan complains and Willow flicks her off as she drives away. When she gets home, she changes into the grungiest pair of shorts she can find and a ratty old sports bra. She pulls the rubber gloves up to her elbows and finds her mother's old rain boots. She ties her long hair into a messy bun on top her head. She pauses at the top of the stairs to let the wave of nausea pass then plunges downstairs without hesitation.

She gags as she shoves pants into the garbage bag that's already almost busting. She's only made progress halfway into the room. The two beds and a couch are nothing more than a jumble of blankets and pillows. Willow shoves them aside, producing more female underwear than male. She screams into the makeshift towel mask she's fashioned to protect herself from the smell and goes to get another garbage bag.

She dry heaves at the bottom of the stairs, thankful that she had the foresight to skip lunch so her stomach would be empty. She quickly checks all the typical hiding spots- Piper has a tendency to shove socks into his pillowcase for reasons that cannot be explained and Ken is known for losing jeans under his bed. Once she's satisfied with her sweep, she lugs the three bulging garbage bags up the stairs and into the laundry room, cussing the entire time. She's straining to pour the first bag into the washer when a casual voice asks,

"Need some help there?" She spins around, spilling the clothes all around her as she stares in disbelief. Abel Teller grins at her, leaning against the doorway like he never left.

 **AN:** Short chapter, but I'm leaving it here... REVIEW!


	31. Chapter 31

She is suddenly burningly aware that she is in nothing more than what could be considered underwear, with a dishtowel wrapped around her face and her hair a ratty mess. Abel appears to notice none of this. Instead he's leaning away from the clothes, looking appalled.

"They smell." Willow says needlessly, her voice muffled through the towel.

"Clearly." Abel says, making a face. "I take back my offer for help. I'm going into the kitchen." He retreats and Willow hastily shoves as much of the clothes as she can into the wash and presses start. She strips off the boots and walks into the kitchen, staring at him.

"What are you doing here?" She asks openly, voicing the only thought on her mind. He shrugs nonchalantly.

"I said I'd come back after Tommy graduated. Passing through on my way to check out a couple job prospects." He says and she turns her back on him so she can peel off her rubber gloves and rinse them in the sink.

"I meant why my house." She clarifies.

"Figured Pipes and Ken would be here. Instead I got maid Willow." He jokes and she snorts.

"Damn right you did. They're on a two-day ride for some meeting in Oregon. They'll be back tomorrow. They left early this morning, hence why I had to go clean out the pit of doom." She says and that gets a chuckle out of Abel.

"Can I hang out with you?" He asks her curiously and she turns, raising an eyebrow. He's grinning innocently.

"I'm babysitting some of the club kids tonight and tomorrow I have my last day of school. Are you going to stay out of trouble?" She asks pointedly and he even bats his eyes for effect.

"I'll be so good you'll hardly know I was there." He assures her and she rolls her eyes.

"I'm going to shower because I smell like motorcycle boys. Get ready for babysitting." She warns him.

"Can't wait!" He calls as she locks the bathroom door. Frantically, she calls her mother.

"Wills, is everything ok? Did you find something terrible in the boys' room?" She asks, panicked.

"Abel is here." Willow says without preamble.

"Teller?"

"Yes mom, how many other Abel's do we know?"

"Why?"

"Apparently to see the boys!"

"Did you tell him they'd be back tomorrow?"

"Mom!"

"Ok, ok I'm sorry. Stupid question."

"He wants to come babysitting with me tonight."

"That's a great idea!" Lyla sounds delighted and Willow wonders if Ellie has been talking with her.

"Goodbye mom." She says, hanging up and hopping in a warm shower. She hopes the water will calm her down but she eventually gives up trying to shave her legs after her shaking hands cause more than a couple cuts. She hops out, wrapping her hair in a towel and putting on shorts and tee shirt.

"You know, I can never figure out how girls do that." He says thoughtfully when she pauses to check that the kitchen is still intact.

"Do what?" She asks suspiciously.

"That towel-turban thing." He says, pointing at her towel on her head. "My mom does it all the time and Tommy and I can never figure it out."

"Womanly secret." She tells him, pulling it off and shaking her wet hair out. "Hurry up or we'll be late. Car or bike?"

"You just want a chance to drive my bike again." He says, eyes twinkling.

"Don't be an ass." She cautions him and he puts his hands up, grabbing his sunglasses off the counter. Rang and Cruz are in the driveway playing basketball when they pull up. They both stare suspiciously at the motorcycle, until Willow gets off.

"We don't need a babysitter!" Cruz yells.

"You shut your mouth." Willow says, pointing at him and he backs down. "I'm not here to babysit you, I'm here because neither of you two idiots can be trusted with Kalli."

"Sweet, so we can leave." Rang says, tossing the basketball onto the yard and starting for the moped in the driveway.

"Not a chance." Willow says flatly, catching the back of his shirt and pulling him back. Still scrawny at 15, Rang fights for a couple seconds then gives up. "Inside, we're having a chat."

"About what?" Cruz whines.

"You two dumbasses." Willow says and the boys exchange looks. Abel follows, grinning. When they walk in, Willow is promptly attacked.

"WILLOW!" Kalli yells at the top of her lungs. "RAI TOOK MY TOYS!"

"Every damn time." Willow says, frustrated. She scoops her up and storms into the playroom, where Rai is calmly playing with a couple trucks. He looks up innocently when she walks in and stares him down.

"Hi Willy." He says happily and Kalli makes a noise of annoyance.

"Toys to Kalli. Now." Willow orders and he opens his mouth to protest. She holds a finger up. "Now. Or I'll get Neva." The threat of his big sister makes Rai frown, but he hands over the toys and she sets Kalli down. She points to both of them. "Play nice, I mean it." She walks into the living room, leaning over the couch to kiss Neva's head. She pauses her show and takes her ear buds out.

"What are you doing here?" She asks.

"Watching you idiots." Willow calls, walking into the kitchen, pointing to Cruz and Rang then the table. They sit, protesting the whole time. "Where are Isaias and Zane?" She asks and they shrug.

"They're out back on the trampoline." Neva says loudly and Willow looks through a window to check.

"Thanks. Ok you two, let's hear it." She says, sitting at the table and folding her arms. Abel leans against a counter, watching in interest.

 **AN:** Happy Monday! I've made it through a crazy weekend of weddings and midterms, so I'm happy to report that I finally have time to breathe and give you guys... Abel! Sorry I left you on a cliffhanger... Or am I? Leave reviews, thoughts, comments... Hell, even just copy and paste your favorite line into a review and let me know what made you laugh or smile. Hope you guys have a great week and thanks for reading!


	32. Chapter 32

**AN:** For GV, and her ever enduring tendency to clock those who anger her in the face- you make my life equal parts worrisome and interesting.

* * *

"Hear what?" Cruz asks sullenly.

"I know about what happened at school last week." Willow says and neither of them shows a flicker of emotion. "You two started a fight. What as it about?"

"Nothing." Rang says shortly and Willow narrows her eyes. "It was no big deal Wills."

"Well both your dads had to go get you from school, so I'd say it was." She points out and they both stare back at her, blank faced. "Tell me, or I'll crash the moped and blame you guys." She threatens and they look at each other. It's clear they've grown up with each other when they hold an entire conversation with nothing more than raised eyebrows and tiny shrugs.

"Someone called us ghetto kids." Cruz admits and Willow stares at him. "He said that our dads care more about their bikes than us and that's why we're all in hand-me-downs and shit. He said we're not worth a damn." Willow rests her head on the table.

"Really? How many times have we had to deal with this shit?" She asks and Cruz opens his mouth to protest. Willow cuts him off by holding up her hand. "I've told you a billion times, ignore it. That's all you can do! If you start beating the shit out of them, you're just proving their point."

"If we're not allowed to react, how come you got to beat the shit out of Misty Rogers at the homecoming game this year?" Rang asks slyly and Abel chokes. Willow puts her head in her hands.

"Misty Rogers had it coming. Point is, I waited until school was done so I didn't get in trouble there!" She claims heatedly and the boys look smug, while Abel is staring at her, stunned.

"So no more fighting, unless it's off school property?" Cruz asks, with a shit-eating grin. Willow flings a placemat at him.

"Fuck off you little shits. Go outside. I don't want to see you anymore. I'm sick of it. Go." She commands, rubbing her temples. They scramble away from the table, shoving each other.

"Tell me you got into catfights." Abel begs. Willow narrows her eyes at him.

"They weren't catfights." She objects.

"Catfights imply that the other girl fought back. Girls usually don't when Willow gets pissed." Neva says, opening the fridge. Abel looks at her, grinning.

"It's not that bad." Willow says.

"Tell me all about it, please." Abel says, leaning on the back of her chair and looking to Neva. "Misty Rogers and homecoming, it sounds like something I would love to hear about." Neva glances unsurely at Willow, who accepts her fate and waves a hand.

"Well this Misty Rogers girl just talks a lot of shit." Neva launches into it instantly. "Willow was at the homecoming game and she was holding Abrielle and Misty asked if the halftime show was gonna be strippers and said that Willow should put her kid down and go get ready and Willow just kinda handed me Bri and all the sudden she just sucker punched Misty in the face and walked off." Neva tells.

"Do not make it sound like a good thing." Willow grumbles.

"It sounds awesome." Abel says, awed.

"Don't fuck with girls that are taught to sucker punch by Jaycee." Willow advises, bumping fists with Neva, who's grinning.

"Willow Winston, the badass. I wanna know more." Abel teases and Willow sticks her tongue out, checking out the window on the boys. She frowns and opens the window slightly.

"ZANE QUIT CHOCKING ISAIAS!" She bellows and Abel looks alarmed. She calmly shuts the window and opens the fridge, biting her lip. "What should we have for supper?"

"So what kids belong to who here?" He asks, looking at the pictures on the fridge, full of kids. Willow plucks the largest one down and sets it on the table. Abel studies it. It looks like it was taken sometime recently- Willow has slightly shorter hair, but otherwise looks the same.

"This winter we finally got everyone together for a Christmas party." She explains. "Each club member had all of his kids there. It was impressive." She reflects, readying the stove for grilled cheese and soup.

"Ok, so Rat has 3 kids." He says thoughtfully, recognizing Rang, Zane, and Kalli. "And Happy has 4." He sees Cruz, Neva, Isaias, and Raimundo.

"Little shits, the lot of them. They all live in town." Willow clarifies. "Tig has a daughter Fawn who's old enough to have her own kids. Chibs has a daughter over in Ireland, Kerrieanne." She says and Abel frowns at the photo.

"They're not here." He informs her and she gives him an eye roll.

"Of course they're not. You're not either. Who's next?" She asks and he looks.

"Uh, T.O."

"He has 4 kids, Omari, Shani, Torrin, and Jahari." She rattles off. He raises an eyebrow. "They don't live in Charming." She says, focused on her cooking. "Omari and Shani live with his sister, since their mom is in lock up. Torrin is from a girl he knocked in Oregon, so he lives there. And Jahari is with another baby mama in Stockton. He's a cutie. We see him sometimes." She says and Abel is looking at her with raised eyebrows.

"Four kids, three baby mamas?" He asks and she gives him a look.

"Would you expect anything less from these guys?" She asks and he nods at her point.

"Ok, next is Montez." He says and she squints slightly.

"Uh, he has twin girls, Mireya and Isidora." She says and Abel looks at the identical Hispanic girls in front of their father, looking serious.

"Are they here?" He asks.

"Nope. Mom has them with her new husband in Arizona. They come and stay a decent amount though. He visits them as much as he can." She says and Abel rolls his eyes.

"Alright, what about Quinn's kids?" He asks, looking at the boy who's a spitting image of his father.

"4 of them. Ryder was an 'oops' baby with a crow eater that then died of an overdose." She says quietly and Abel has to stop himself from touching his scar. "Quinn keeps him pretty close. He'll be a Son, I'm sure of it. Lexi is his next daughter. She lives with her grandma a couple hours away. He's in a pretty big custody battle to get her home, since her mom ditched out with another guy. And then he has two little ones, Autumn and Abrielle here with his girlfriend Jaycee. She's a stripper turned boxer turned crow eater." She says, leaning over his shoulder and resting her fingers on the little girls.

"That's a lot of kids." He says, trying to remember all the names.

"23 of us, counting Fawn and Kerrieanne. Only 13 of us live in Charming." She says and he looks at her thoughtfully.

"And you're the oldest." He asks and she shrugs.

"Technically, Ellie is. But once she left, I took over. I mean, Rang and Cruz are only 3 and 4 years younger than me, but I feel so far from them. Like it's crazy to me that I'm 17 years apart from Bri." She says then runs down the hallway at the first hint of a wail.

 **AN:** Sorry, that's probably a crazy amount of kids to throw out, but I was always bothered that the show never showed the kids and since my story is Next Gen... It felt fitting. And I am aware this is a filler chapter and I am sorry, stick with me, it was a necessary evil and I promise the action resumes very, very quickly, but in the mean time, you get Willow and Abel bonding. Please review as always!


	33. Chapter 33

"What's the crying about?" Abel asks Kalli, when Willow walks back in with her on her hip. Kalli looks at him shyly over Willow's shoulder.

"Rai hit me." She says, pouting.

"Did you hit him first?" Willow asks firmly and after a pause, Kalli nods. "4 years old and she's already taking on a 6 year old." Willow huffs. "Is fighting in your blood or what?"

"It was in yours." He teases and she shoots him a deadly look, stirring the tomato soup.

"I'd bet that you had some fight stories." She says harshly and he shrugs.

"Plenty. I can't blame the boys for fighting people that call them white trash. I did the same." He reveals and Willow stirs in silence. She kisses Kalli's head then sets her down.

"Go watch TV with Neva ok? Leave Raimundo alone for a little while." She suggests and Kalli runs off. She straightens up and looks at him thoughtfully, sizing him up. He reclines, unworried. She finds it so hard to reconcile this calm man with the one with a gun in the warehouse. Here, he is just another guy that jokes with her. But the memory of the man he was still makes her uneasy.

"Like what you see?" He says suggestively and she rolls her eyes, turning back to the stove to hide her blush.

"Since you're such a great big brother and chef, you can make the sandwiches. Neva doesn't like crust. Make Kalli's extra cheesy but only put half that amount on Zane's." She lists off and he scrambles to do as told.

They round the kids up for supper a short while later. Willow reigns over the chaos calmly, pouring more juice where it's needed and stopping Zane from taking Neva's last bite of her sandwich. Abel watches, amused.

"At least you won't have to be scared of being a mom." He comments, as she washes dishes and hands them to him to dry.

"Are you kidding me?" She asks, raising an eyebrow. "That's been my biggest fear since I was 14."

"Why? You'd be a great mom." He says and she shrugs.

"Sure, I know how to handle kids and if you made me run a daycare for a day I probably wouldn't stress out, but getting pregnant as a teenager… Different story." She says ruefully.

"Why? I know a couple teen moms and they do great." He says and she nods in acknowledgement.

"Sure, but having a baby is like an anchor that keeps me in Charming. No college, no leaving. No parties when I want, no coffee shop dates to myself in the morning, no more life outside a baby." She points out. "If I had a baby, I would have to stay in Charming forever."

"What's wrong with Charming? Why do you hate it so much?" Abel asks, genuinely curious, and Willow puts the clean dishes away, pondering how to respond.

"It's that it can crawl under your skin and make you crazy from the inside out. I feel like the air makes me angry, the sun is a thousand times stronger, the water tastes like metal, everything just makes your skin crawl. It's like every cell in my body knows I'm here and it hates it just as much as my mind. I hate this place. I hate that it makes me so frustrated, I hate that it makes me feel like a loser. I cannot wait to leave. I need to. Not because I hate some small town or because I want to be a college girl. I need to leave because this town makes me feel like jumping off a bridge or driving full speed into a wall at midnight. Anything to lessen the weight that's crushing my chest." It spills out of her in a wave and she can do nothing to stop it.

"Oh." Abel says and she feels suddenly self-conscious once more. She tells him too much. She doesn't know if because she's so desperate to explain herself to someone that hasn't known her for her entire life or if she just talks too much.

"Sorry." She mutters, wiping down the counters ferociously so she doesn't have to look at him. There's a long, somewhat awkward pause.

"That's how I felt in my town. I grew up with a lot of junkies around me, because my mom's a counselor. I had a lot of anger issues, because I wanted my dad back. Everyone I had ever loved and had loved me had died. My mom, my dad, my grandma, my grandpa, a lot of people. I thought I would die too. It took a lot of time to work through that. So I know what it's like to be stuck somewhere and feel like the only thing you can do is run away. It's why I bought a bike." He says softly and Willow glances at him.

"Willy, what's college?" Kalli asks, peeking around the corner and looking at her with big eyes. Willow scoops her up and kisses her head.

"It's school, but for big kids. Big kids go live there and study stuff." She explains and Kalli frowns.

"Are you going to college?" She asks worriedly and Willow exchanges a look with Abel.

"Yes baby, but I'm still gonna be around you." She promises and Kalli doesn't look reassured. Zane sticks his head around the door.

"Wills, can Abel, uh, come play with us?" He asks hopefully and Willow gestures to him.

"Sure." Abel agrees good-naturedly, walking outside.

"Can we cuddle and watch movies?" Kalli asks Willow, holding her face and Willow smiles, nuzzling her.

"Of course, little one."

* * *

She tenses slightly when she feels Abel behind her, but continues to pick up the toys, tossing them into their respective baskets. Kalli and Rai are watching a movie before bed, so she takes the opportunity to make sure everything is cleaned up before Brooke gets home.

"When are we done?" He asks and she looks at him over her shoulder, amused.

"Worn out?" She teases and he nods, rubbing his face.

"I had no idea that little kids demand so much attention." He says, slumping against the doorframe.

"That's Zane and Isaias for you." She says with a slight smile. "Their teachers think they have attention issues. We're inclined to agree."

"They're funny. They have interesting world views." He says and she nods, shutting the door and poking her head into Zane's room, where's they're playing video games. Neva is still on her phone and Rang and Cruz are at a friend's house. "When are we done?" He repeats and Willow checks her phone.

"Brooke is on her way back now. She'll be back in a little bit, so then we can go." She reassures him.

"I thought you'd be studying or something." He says, as they sit at the kitchen table. "That's all you were doing last time I was here."

"My classes are basically done. Today and tomorrow are basically catch up days. We return books and if we're missing anything, we have these two days to do it. So technically, I'm done with school." She says happily.

"Well congrats. Graduating high school is a big deal." He says and she remembers him telling her about Thomas graduating too.

"Your brother, he graduated, right?" She asks curiously and he nods.

"This weekend. Top of his class, smart as shit." He says, his face closing off again. Willow wonders if she should press him then throws caution to the wind.

"What's he like?" She asks, leaning back and observing him. He tugs at his hair thoughtfully.

"He's a good kid." He says finally. "He's really smart and he honest to god never shuts up. He's got about a billion ideas a day and he can never sit still long enough to figure them out. We had to put him in sports so he would be tired enough to fall asleep at night. We were really close as kids, but it's harder now. He sees me as too much like our dad… Like I said, he doesn't like my bike. He's gonna go off to college this fall, so I'm hoping distance will help." He muses thoughtfully.

"Me too." She mutters and they lapse into silence until Brooke gets home, thanking Willow profusely and hugging her tightly.

"I need to pay you." She mutters, fending off Kalli and reaching for her purse.

"Don't even think about it." Willow insists. "You organized my entire party and helped out so much. This is just me paying you back."

"Then I need to pay Abel." She says, offering him money. Abel puts his hands up.

"She did all the work." He says and Willow pulls him out the door, ignoring Brooke's protests to take the money. She grabs the helmet and tucks herself into his back as they ride for home.

"How was babysitting?" Lyla asks as they walk in.

"All 7 are alive." Willow responds, sticking her head into the laundry room and sighing in relief that all the laundry is done.

"Small miracles." Lyla says, occupied with bills. "Thank you for cleaning out the basement. I know I owe you."

"You sure as hell do." Willow mutters, heading for the living room and groaning at the sight of four huge laundry baskets filled with clothes to be folded.

"I can do that." Lyla says, correctly interpreting Willow's noises of frustration.

"No, I got it." She says grumpily, shaking out pants in the first one and folding them. Abel joins her and she gives him a surprised look.

"Big brother, remember? Mom got busy sometimes." He says, neatly folding a tee shirt.

"You are a weird man, Abel Teller." Willow says and a smile quirks at the corners of his mouth.

"So I've been told."

* * *

"I want a picture!" Lyla cries as Willow squeals and tries to avoid her grasp. "WILLOW JOCELYN WINSTON!" She bellows and Willow sighs, pausing and smiling in the doorway. "Happy last day of school!" She yells and Willow practically sprints for her car.

"How was doomsday?" Jordan asks, as they walk into school amid a loud, cheering mass.

"Filthy. Guess who showed up at the end of it." She says calmly, side-stepping several whooping boys.

"Your brothers?" Jordan guesses, nonplussed. Willow shakes her head.

"No, Abel Teller."

"The guy from the club a couple weeks ago?" She asks, forehead furrowed in confusion.

"That's the one." Willow confirms.

"Why?" Jordan asks and she shrugs.

"I dunno, but he babysat with me." She says and Jordan narrows her eyes, pointing at her.

"That's a date." She says and Willow starts shaking her head. "Yes, yes, yes it is, it is. That was a date Willow and you can't tell me it wasn't. What did you guys do? Willow! WILLOW!" Willow darts through the hallways, trying to put as much distance between her and Jordan as possible.

"So is it true?" Camila demands as Willow laughs while watching a couple guys try to balance several desks on top of each other.

"What's true?" She asks carelessly.

"That you have a thing for that guy Abel." Willow rolls her eyes and throws a pencil at the stacked desks.

"I do not, Jordan just gets overly excited whenever I mention that I have males in my life." She sasses and Camila has no time to press her as the teacher walks in and begins scolding them all.

"We ready for this?" Camila asks, catching Jordan and Willow's hands as they all excitedly watch the clock.

"Yes." Willow says passionately, squeezing her hand tightly and bouncing around impatiently. "It is past time to leave here."

"5… 4… 3… 2… 1!" They all chant, screaming as the bell rings, releasing them from Charming High School forever. A huge crowd guides them down the hall and into the bright, warm sunlight and Willow hangs tightly to her two best friends, laughing the whole way.

 **AN:** Happy Halloween to those of you that celebrate it! Hopefully you read this, then have a safe and scary weekend. More Willow and Abel bonding... The next chapter contains graduation, fights, and a big announcement... See you guys Monday, otherwise please leave me reviews on your thoughts- was it really a date? Is it ironic that Thomas is going to college and Abel never really did? Also, I'm re-watching the first season and I'm going to write a couple one shots based on each episode, if that's something you guys want to read, let me know!


	34. Chapter 34

"I like your cap." Lyla says quietly, holding Willow's robes and cords while she finishes straightening her hair. Willow glances at the cap, tossed carelessly on her bed. It is simple compared to Jordan's- her entire cap is rhinestones. Willow had taken a subtler approach- it says 'Opie- SOA' in black rhinestones on one side. She smiles sadly.

"Thanks. Jordy helped." She says, swiping on a little more mascara and standing up. Lyla holds up the robe so Willow can slip it on.

"I can't believe I got all you kids through school." She mutters, straightening the many cords that hang around Willow's neck. "My little baby." She says, touching Willow's face gently. Willow smiles and leans into it. "I wish your dad could've been here to see this." Willow shuts her eyes briefly.

"Me too." She says tightly, putting her cap on and taking a deep breath. "How do I look?"

"Like the most amazing student Charming High School has seen." Lyla says, tearing up and Willow kisses her cheek, walking downstairs.

"There she is!" Ellie and her brothers cheer. She does a little curtsy, bobbing her head so they can see her cap. When she straightens up, she sees Ellie has tears in her eyes and both her brothers are stoic.

"Remember, I'm on the left side." She says quickly to change the subject and they all nod. "Ok, I need to get there and line up." She says, kissing their cheeks. She lingers longest on Ellie, biting her lip. "I took your advice about the ceremony." She warns her and Ellie's eyebrows shoot up. Then she waves and hurries out.

"You look so cute!" Camila squeals when Willow walks into the hallway where their class is gathered.

"Thanks." Willow says with a grin, hugging her briefly. Jordan arrives and there's a flurry of picture taking and checking each other over again and again, making sure their tassels are on the correct side and their cords are even. Finally it's time to line up and Willow falls into line between Nate Wilson and Amanda Woodbury. She takes a deep breath and begins to walk.

In the gym, she sees that the bleachers are almost full and searches for a couple seconds before she spots them. She nearly stumbles when she sees how many people are cheering and waving- it looks like the entire club. Her family is furthest down, beaming at her. Then it's all the club members and their families, including most of the kids she had told Abel about. Abel himself is seated between Tig and Chibs, smiling and clapping. She sits as the introduction begins, struggling not to fidget.

Everything is going too slowly and too quickly at the same time. Willow struggles to listen to the speeches, given by the mayor of Charming and a teacher, two of her classmates and someone from the community college. She's anxious to get her diploma and have her announcement made. She wants to twist around and gesture wildly for Ellie to remove the club but instead she stares straight ahead as the choir serenades them with a song about remembering your past.

Finally, they begin calling names and students walk across the stage, shaking hands and beaming. Willow's stomach turns and she's not totally convinced that she won't throw up. She holds her hands tightly in her lap, managing a weak smile as Jordan parades across stage, then Camila. They get to the W's and Willow stands, walking to the side of the stage, knees knocking together.

"Kiera Wagner, attending Portland State University." The principal calls and they all move a step forward as Kiera walks across stage. "Nate Wilson, attending Charming Community College." Nate walks up the stairs and suddenly Willow is next. She feels like fainting. She takes a deep breath, knowing that at least they'll know at this point. "Willow Winston, attending the University of California, Los Angeles."

She doesn't hear any roars or gunshots above the cheers as she walks across the stage, shaking the hands of her many teachers and finally the principal, who hands her the case holding her diploma with a grin. She smiles back automatically and turns to look at her family as Amanda's name is called.

Ellie is still beaming, clapping. Her mother is wiping tears off her cheeks, lowering a camera. Piper and Ken are still clapping but they looked stunned, like someone has punched them in the stomach. From what she can tell, everyone else is still clapping. She returns to her seat and sits, still trembling slightly.

The ceremony ends and they file back out of the gym, hugging each other and looking at their diplomas in awe. Willow listens to Camila and Jordan chatter, uneasily awaiting the teachers' signal that they can leave and rejoin their families in the parking lot. Finally, it's given and they spill out of the school, many of them with their middle fingers raised in the air, as is tradition. Willow exchanges final kisses with Camila and Jordan then walks slowly towards the clump of leather-wearing men.

"Willow graduated!" Ellie squeals, running for her and grabbing her in a tight hug. "I mean, we never doubted you would, but still. Mom's 4 for 4!"

"We're so proud of you." Lyla says, joining Ellie's hug. Willow clings tightly to Ellie; fearful of what will happen when she lets go. Ellie pulls back and stands aside. Ken and Piper look at her, arms folded. She bites her lip and suddenly they pull her into their arms.

"You did so good." Ken mutters.

"Yeah, better than us." Piper adds and Willow leans back.

"Of course I did better than you two, I'm a thousand times smarter." She says, trying to hold back tears.

"Aye, dat's true." Bowen says, pushing past her brother and hugging her tightly. When he lets go, Willow faces Tig and Chibs, who stand shoulder to shoulder, looking at her.

"UCLA." Tig states and Willow wishes she had the forethought to wear flats instead of heels so she could start running.

"I have a 60% scholarship there." She starts quietly.

"An' it just slipped ya mind ta tell us, did it?" Chibs asks, with a raised eyebrow and she flinches.

"I thought you would be mad." She whispers, hanging her head.

"Mad?" Rat demands. "We'd be mad?"

"Yes!" Willow says, looking up at him. "You'd be mad that I'm trying to leave Charming! You'd think that I was abandoning the club. That I've been completely ungrateful for everything you guys have done for me since my dad died. That'd I'd be spitting in the face of 18 years of love and loyalty." She says and there's a solid line of men in kuttes facing her down. Ellie stands behind her and she feels a sense of relief.

"Willow Jocelyn Winston." Chibs growls and she braces herself for the impending punishment. "Did ya really think we would be dat angry?"

"Yes." She says instantly.

"Silly girl." Tig says, shaking his head. "Silly, silly girl…" He trails off and Willow stares at them, bewildered.

"Dis!" Chibs says, gesturing to the diploma that Lyla holds. "Dis is why we took care of ya and ya family, feek." She startles at the name, a term of endearment. Chibs hasn't called her that in a long time.

"Is this why you stopped coming around the club?" Happy demands. "Because you decided you were going to college and you thought we would be angry with you?" She squirms.

"Yes." She admits and Tig throws his hands up.

"God save me from the stubbornness of Winston women." He says, giving Lyla and Ellie an exasperated look.

"You thought that we would keep you from going to college?" Rat asks, picking up Kalli when she attempts to make a break for Willow.

"Yes." She says meekly. "It's Los Angeles! I thought you would tell me there's no way the club can let me go that far, that I would have to pick a school that's closer. Somewhere the club can keep an eye on me." She protests.

"I'm not opposed to that idea." Ken says instantly and Quinn smacks his arm to shut him up.

"Oh no." Tig says firmly. "You're going to LA you sneaky little shit. You're going, but you are in so much trouble for keeping this from us. So much trouble." He repeats and her jaw drops.

"Wait… I can go?" She asks weakly.

"Of course ya can!" Chibs says loudly.

"Do you really think we'd make you stay and let you be a sweetbutt or an old lady for some MC?" Happy asks and she opens her mouth. "Shut up Willow. The club will discuss this later and you'll tell us the entire truth so we know what your plans are, but of course you're going to college."

"Glad we got that settled. Everyone in, I want a picture!" Lyla yells and everyone, from the men to the little kids, groan. They file in behind Willow, jostling for spots and sorting out height order. Kalli clings to Willow's leg and she ends up holding Abrielle. Somehow, Abel is beside her and when she glances at him, his smile seems to say 'I told you so'. As Lyla hands the camera to another parent and runs to get in the picture, Willow can't help but beam for the first time in months.

 **AN:** And the club knows! The story is far from over though... Much more to come. Thank you for reading, please leaves reviews, I really do love it even if it's something as simple as someone telling me that you picture Abel having Jax's swagger walk or telling me that you can't wait for the next update.


	35. Chapter 35

_'Are we partying?'_

Willow reads Camila's text as she drives towards the clubhouse and bites her lip. She looks up and smiles at the line of bikes ahead of her, riding two wide on the road.

 _'Not tonight. We've got the entire summer. I'll be at the clubhouse.'_

She knows Camila will likely throw a fit about her being at the club on the night after graduation, but she's got no desire to go hang out with gangbangers and older men that leer at her. All she really wants to do is have a couple drinks with her rowdy extended family, laugh as they bicker and fight, then get a ride home and curl up with her sister. She wants to be with the club tonight and, as much as she doesn't want to admit it, she wants to be with the man at the end of the line of motorcycles, the only one not in a kutte.

"Someone get the graduate a beer!" Ellie yells, ushering her in, beaming. The club is already partying. Tig and Rat are fighting about Los Angeles in one corner, while everyone else takes shots and plays pool. Willow sits on the bar, drinking and swinging her legs, watching and laughing.

"Told you." Abel says smugly, leaning on the bar next to her and rummaging through the half empty alcohol bottles before producing a mostly full one with a triumphant smile. Willow finds them two shot glasses and sets them before him.

"Told me what?" She asks, grinning, stupid happy from the alcohol.

"That it was pointless to worry." He reminds her and she pushes him with one hand, giggling.

"I grew up in the club, you didn't. You had no idea of how they would react!" She protests and he laughs.

"I'm a man, aren't I?" He points out and she gives a dainty little shrug.

"Can this man hold his alcohol?" She teases, gesturing for him to pour into the shot glasses. He does as told, frowning in concentration. He holds it up triumphantly, filled to the brim. They clink glasses and down the shots. Despite her best intentions, Willow gags.

"What kind of shit is this?" Abel demands, wheezing.

"Oh, I think I'm gonna be sick." Willow complains.

"I gotta get air." Abel says and Willow nods, nearly falling off the counter. Abel catches her arm and guides her out the door. They sit at the picnic table, gasping the cool night air in. Willow feels some of the haze clear and she leans back, smiling up at the night sky.

"I haven't been this drunk in a long time." She admits and he laughs slightly, tilting his head back as well.

"Enjoy the stars here. You can't see them as well in L.A." He tells her and she looks at him curiously.

"What do you know about L.A?" She asks and he gives her a quick look.

"I'm gonna pee." He says, standing up and rounding the corner. Willow leans her chin on her interlaced fingers, staring at the stars. She jumps when someone places a hand on her shoulder.

"I didn't mean to scare you." Nick says, taking a step back and she shakes her head, making the world spin.

"Just thinking." She says, rubbing her temples.

"Don't think too much." Nick mutters and she looks at him, confused, before his hand is over her mouth and she can't breathe.

* * *

Her first instinct is to sit up and she tries to do so, but there is a heavy weight pressing down on her chest. She remains still, trying to breathe. She momentarily panics, thinking she's gone blind, before her other senses take over, alerting her to the fabric pressing into her face. She keeps breathing, trying to figure everything out, still groggy.

Her hands are tied, that much she knows. They're crushed beneath her, making her fingers go numb. Her legs must be tied as well, because her knees are bent at an awkward angle. The weight on her chest is the worst and she debates crying out before suddenly the weight is gone and she's sliding across the cold metal floor. She slams into something soft and warm before straightening out.

"What the hell happened?" Someone is yelling. Willow stays still, unsure if they can see her or not.

"I got her, didn't I?" The other voice asks and Willow feels like throwing up. She knows that voice. She grew up with that voice. It taunted and teased her. "So why are you complaining?" Nick points out.

"Because why the fuck is there some guy back there too?" The other man demands and Willow moves her feet, prodding at the soft mass behind her. She prays it's not Abel but knows it is.

"Because he was fucking there, alright? I thought she went outside alone and he came around the corner, what the fuck was I suppose to do, let him go back inside and tell the entire damn MC that I drugged her and was pulling her towards your damn van? You're lucky I managed to knock him out." Nick sneers and Willow wants to start screaming but the blackness is starting again.

 **AN:** Well, it's about time that this story return to its Kurt Sutter roots... I'm assuming if you guys love SOA, you won't be strangers to dark storylines. Please leave reviews, I would love input on this storyline. Thanks for reading!


	36. Chapter 36

This time she's sitting up, judging from the uncomfortable angle. Her fingers are still numb, but she wiggles them around and they begin to tingle. The same cloth is covering her eyes and she takes a deep breath, trying to remember what she'd been taught. Stay calm. Don't show fear. Everything will be fine.

"Abel." She whispers hoarsely. "Abel." Silence greets her and she groans, trying not to let the panic bubble back up. She keeps moving her feet, trying to figure out where she's at. "Anyone?" There's a moan to her left and her heart leaps into her throat. "Abel?"

"Oh no." He grumbles and she relaxes into her chair, a whimper escaping from her despite herself.

"Abel, are you ok?" She whispers and there's a long pause.

"My head hurts like a son of a bitch." He states slowly. "And it's not from the alcohol."

"Abel. Listen. We got kidnapped." She says and he swears loudly.

"What the fuck do you mean we got kidnapped?" He demands.

"I mean that prospect Nick drugged me and knocked you out and now we're tied up here." She lists off and he sighs.

"I got that Willow. Why the hell would anyone take us?" He asks and she bites her lip.

"I don't know, I don't know who Nick is or why he'd take us, but we need to figure that out." She tells him and there's enough silence that Willow worries that he's been knocked back out.

"Tell me you're ok." His voice is calmer now and Willow takes a deep breath, trembling again.

"Yeah, I'm ok." She says softly and he exhales.

"If those guys come back in I'll kill them." He threatens murderously. "If they touch you, I'll kill them."

"Abel, calm down, it's going to be—" Her words are cut off when a door opens and slams shut again.

"Well, well, well." The first voice says, sounding amused and every muscle in Willow's body tenses up. "What do we have here?" Both of them remain silent. "I know pretty little Willow Winston, but who's her boyfriend?"

"His name is Abel Teller. He's a hang-around for the club maybe. I'm not really sure." Nick says casually.

"God, you must be as stupid as you are ugly." Abel comments and Willow wishes like hell she could see him so she could smack him.

"What the fuck does that mean?" Nick demands defensively.

"It means you clearly don't know my connections to the club, dumbass." Abel sasses and Willow desperately searches for a toe or foot or anything to step on, something so he'll shut up.

"What connections does some kid like you have to the Sons?" The man scoffs.

"First off, there's my last name." Abel says, tone dripping with sarcasm.

"Abel, maybe now isn't the best time to rehash your family history." Willow hisses and gasps when someone slaps her, hard. Her eyes water and her cheek stings, turning hot.

"Did you just hit her?" Abel demands furiously. There's a loud scraping, like he's dragging his chair across the floor.

"Jax Teller's son." The man says, with a hint of wonder. "We heard that you were far, far away."

"Well I came back, now face me, you coward! What kind of pussy hits a girl that's tied up?"

"Shut him up. Shut them both up. I'm guessing we have till morning before the club notices they're missing. Make sure they're secure." The man orders and the door slams shut again. Willow braces herself for more blows, but she isn't Nick's first target.

Judging from the grunts, Abel is receiving a beating. She tries to block out the brutal sound of the dull thumps of him being hit repeatedly. He never cries out, never begs for it to stop. He endures it. Finally, she can't take anymore.

"Nick! Nick! Stop it!" She cries. "Stop!"

"Willow, no." Abel rasps, sounding as though he's spitting out blood with every word. "Don't touch her!"

"Drink this." Nick orders harshly, shoving a glass against her lips and she obediently swallows. She waits until the door closes to speak.

"Abel, are you ok?" She asks and for the first time, she hears panic in him.

"I'm fine, I'm fine, Willow are you ok, what did he make you do?"

"Just drink something, I think he's drugging me…" Her words start slurring and she wants to say more but her tongue is oddly heavy.

"Willow, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have let him hurt you. Willow, stay with me, please… Willow, I'm sorry, I didn't—"

 **AN:** Sorry for the short chapter, like I said, school does not seem to be slowing down anytime soon (sadly). Less sorry for the little cliffhanger, but I promise, next week I will reveal all! Have a great weekend, thanks for reading, and thanks to all of you who reviewed and told me you liked the twist- it couldn't be sunshine and roses the entire time, not in Charming. Please review!


	37. Chapter 37

When she wakes this time, her hands are tied in front of her and she's lying on her side. She blinks, flinching at the light. Then she opens her eyes wide. Light. No blindfold. She looks around frantically.

It's a grimy room, with two chairs in the center. She's been tossed down on a mattress against the wall. She sits up, ignoring her pounding headache, looking for Abel. She has to bite back a scream when she spots him.

He's in dark corner, head resting against the wall. His blond hair is dirty and pushed back. His eyes are closed, showcasing two magnificent black eyes. Bruises and cuts darken his face and it looks as though there isn't a patch of skin that hasn't been touched. She gets up, stumbling towards him. She practically falls into his lap when she kneels next to him.

"Abel, wake up." She says desperately. He twitches a couple times and finally opens one eye.

"Willow." He says instantly, trying to reach her face, hands still tied together. "Are you ok, did he touch you, did anything happen?" He asks and she shakes her head, trying to clean the blood off his face.

"Why did they untie me?" She asks and he shakes his head.

"I don't know, they both just walked in and untied me from the chair. I got another beat down and they left me here. They untied you, but you must've been drugged still because you didn't even move. They threw you over there and left. I must've passed out, I don't know what happened next." He tells her and she leans back, taking another deep breath.

"Who the hell are these guys?" She puzzles and Abel shrugs then winces. "You need to lie down. You can't sleep, you have a concussion." She tells him and helps him stand. He limps over to the mattress and reclines slowly.

"How do you expect me to stay awake?" He asks and she leans against the wall next to him.

"I'll talk to you." She promises.

"I should've never let this happen to you." He mutters and she shakes her head.

"Abel, I heard them talking. They drugged me and then Nick knocked you out when you came around the corner. Neither of us had a chance. This is not your fault." She says firmly.

"Well, I know one thing." He says and she looks down at him. "They're not going to live much longer because if I don't kill them, Tig will." A shiver runs down her spine at his words. She has no doubt Abel will kill.

"Ok, we need to talk about something so that you don't fall asleep." She says, trying to change the subject. "Where have you gone on your bike?"

"All over California. I used to take the weekends and skip school Friday to go ride wherever I felt. I always avoided Charming though." He says and she looks at him curiously.

"Why?" She asks and he sighs.

"I remember a lot for a kid." He says slowly. "I remember my grandma and my dad and my mom. I remember what it was like to live here with them. I remember being happy and then everyone started dying. Do you know anything about me?" He asks and she ponders the question.

"No." She says honestly. "We hardly talk about our past or anything that involves dad. If it has to do with him, everyone usually clams up about it."

"Would you like to?" He asks and she nods. "I told you my mom was a junkie. She was addicted to crank when she was pregnant with me. I was born premature and my insides were upside down. I had a 20% chance of surviving." He says all this plainly and Willow stares at him in amazement. "I also have a heart condition. Call it the family flaw. My grandma Gemma had it and so did my dad's little brother, the first Thomas. Guess who performed the surgery that saved my life?"

"Dr. Tara Knowles." Willow says, remembering that title from an obituary Lyla has tucked in her box of all things SAMCRO.

"That's the one… I thought she was my mom. No one ever told me different, till after she died and my dad explained that she was Thomas's mom and Wendy was mine. Am I a terrible child for wishing that she were mine? I mean, Tommy's an orphan. I lost my dad, but he lost both. But sometimes I would rather have a dead doctor for a mom than a junkie that's still alive." He muses.

"I know that feeling." Willow admits and he looks up at her. "Mom's a pornstar. Trust me, eighth grade is hard enough, but when you have a woman who has sex for a living as a mom? I mean, she was behind the camera at this point, but still. Google Red Woody and her face is the first thing that comes up. I've had more guys ask me for a blowjob than I can count." She says and Abel bristles.

"And Ken and Piper let that happen?" He points out. She gives a little humorless laugh.

"Ken and Piper didn't know." She clarifies. "What would they have done, punch everyone? They were already SAMCRO at this point. Trust me, I didn't want any problems with them, so I just learned to let it roll off my back." She says dismissively.

"And one hell of a sucker punch." Abel says, chuckling before it turns to painful coughing.

"Well, Jaycee decided that all us girls need to be able to hold our own. I'll never forget the look on Piper's face the first time I decked him in the jaw." She says fondly.

"You know they're doing everything to find us, right?" He asks and she feels like someone has squeezed her heart tightly.

"I know." She says quietly. There's a pause and she takes a shaky breath. "It's my fault. They were after me." She confesses.

"I gathered that." Abel says, a hint of his familiar sarcasm back. "Which means that in all likelihood, this was against the club and not me. So there's a high percentage that they already know and are likely fighting tooth and nail to get you back." He says and she's surprised at how much he's thought about it.

"I don't know who would take us though." She says, frustrated. "I didn't think the club was in trouble with anyone."

"Willow, no offense, but I don't think you really know what's going on with the club." Abel says and Willow gives him a look. "You're not a member, you don't know what goes on in church."

"Well, incase you haven't noticed, I'm a girl, so I can't be a member." She says tightly. "And you're not a member either." Before he can retort, the door opens and someone walks in.

It's not Nick, but this man is short as well. He's larger, with a bald spot and one eye that droops shut. He's wearing a stained black tee shirt, showcasing hairy arms covered in tattoos. He surveys them and Willow suddenly remembers something she had learned watching a crime show when she was younger.

If you see their face, that means they're likely going to kill you.

 **AN:** And I'm back! For those of you who expressed concern that this storyline might go on for too long, I promise it's going to be swift, but the implications might last a little bit longer... Well I hope you enjoy this chapter- if you did, please let me know. I love hearing your thoughts!


	38. Chapter 38

**An: TRIGGER WARNING: RAPE.** Dark content ahead.

She tries to keep calm but her breath is getting faster involuntarily. Abel struggles to sit up next to her. He's trying to move in front of her protectively and the man just watches them in silence.

"Enough." He orders and Abel freezes, glaring at the man.

"Who are you?" He demands and the man ignores him, looking instead at Willow. She glares back defiantly, trying to hide her trembling.

"Just another biker." He says smoothly, taking a step closer and Abel presses himself against Willow.

"Why did you take us?" Abel yells and he keeps walking, fixated on Willow. Abel is shaking next to her and she's sure it's not because he's frightened. The man stops a couple steps away from her and tilts his head.

"You're prettier in person." He says thoughtfully and Abel roars with anger. "Calm down." He snaps, kicking Abel in the stomach. Abel doubles over, retching.

"Now Paul, I said enough violence." A voice says and a man in a suit walks in, wiping his hands carelessly. He's older, with silver hair buzzed short, wearing a suit and tie. "I want to talk to them." He stops, staring down at them. "What's your name?" He asks, looking at Abel.

"Go… To… Hell." Abel coughs, spitting blood.

"I've already been there." He says smoothly. "If you don't tell me, I'll let Paul here continue with the violence." He threatens and Abel stares up at him. "Oh, not against you though. Willow here should be a suitable candidate." He says and Abel lashes out again.

"Abel… Teller." He hisses and the man raises his eyebrows.

"Well, it seems as though I went to get a horse and instead found a unicorn." He says, his eye flickering from Abel to Willow before remaining on Abel. "I knew you since you were a baby, Abel Teller. I thought you were long gone in the foster system, with your two dead parents." The man clearly takes enjoyment in the way Abel twitches at the mention of his family.

"What do you want?" Abel asks from between gritted teeth.

"Well, first, I wanted SAMCRO to feel pain. I wanted to take their daughter from them, like my daughter was taken from me. I waited until I could come back to the United States safely and could observe… Discovered that so few girls are born to the club and none to Jax Teller, who was dead. So I thought, what should I do? Then I found out that there was a girl that the club loved… A daughter of them all and I thought nothing could be more perfect. I would take her and then they would know what it's like to lose a daughter." He tells them thoughtfully.

"I'll kill you." Abel vows, trying to cover Willow.

"Oh, she's old news now." He says, waving a hand. "I found Jax Teller's son. I wonder if you're more valuable to them than her. Son of the president, grandson to the president and founder. Like I said, my unicorn." He says, turning and walking away before pausing. "Did I ever tell you what I did to your grandma Gemma?" He asks conversationally.

"Go to hell." Abel repeats and the man turns, a manic glint in his eyes.

"I had her raped." He states and Abel goes rigid. "I had my men rape her so that she would be broken. I've decided I'm going to kill you Abel, but Willow… You see, Paul here has developed a little bit of an obsession with her. Begging me to let him steal her and now that he has, he's been asking if she's… His. I think I should allow it, for the time being. Paul, make sure you chain Abel to the wall. I think he should watch but not interfere." He decides, opening the door. "Oh, and don't forget the video camera. I want the entire club to see this."

"DON'T FUCKING TOUCH HER I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU LET ME FUCKING GO YOU ASSHOLE COWARD I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU C'MON FIGHT ME FIGHT ME LIKE A FUCKING MAN YOU ASSWIPE FIGHT ME DON'T TOUCH HER DON'T FUCKING TOUCH HER C'MON YOU PIG YOU FATASS PIG FUCKING FIGHT ME I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU COWARD—" Abel bellows as Paul heaves him up and drags him towards the wall, Abel fighting the entire way.

"Shut the fuck up!" He yells and Abel looks positively mad, gnashing his teeth and straining to reach him.

"Fight me you fat ass coward." He jeers. "Fight someone your own size." Paul slams his fist into Abel's mouth, leaving it bloody.

"Shut up." Paul says, leaving Abel chained to the wall. He strains at the end of it, trying in vain to get back to Willow. She is scrabbling to get up, but Paul is quicker. He gets there and grabs her head, slamming it back into the wall. It feels as though her skull has split and she slides down the wall, dazed. Vaguely, she can hear Abel screaming in the background as Paul ties her hands above her head. She thrashes about weakly but his weight is overwhelming.

"Willow I'm sorry." Abel is moaning now. "Willow, I am so, so sorry… Willow… I'LL KILL YOU, YOU FAT BASTARD LEAVE HER ALONE!" He screams, anguished. Willow tries to stay awake but as the man's hand pushes her dress up and tears at her spandex she was wearing underneath, all she can do is turn her head to the left where Abel is tied up.

"It's ok…" She whispers, trying to reassure him. She closes her eyes as she feels the spandex rip at the seams and come off completely. She fades out of consciousness as rough fingers hold her wrists down.

 **AN:** Well this story was rated M for a reason... I didn't name the man and that was intentional, I will reveal it next chapter but I feel like you all might figure it out. Please leave me reviews, and I promise next chapter will be a little bit brighter.


	39. Chapter 39

She awakes to a sharp pain in her stomach and she groans, trying to roll onto her side. She finds she can, as her hands are just loosely tied in front of her once more. She opens her eyes, adjusting to the light for the second time. Abel is crumpled against the wall and she tries to make her way there, limping from the pain between her legs, but determined to make it. She gasps at the stinging and Abel jerks awake with wide eyes.

"Willow." He says instantly, sitting up. She kneels next to him, closing her eyes and waiting for the pain to subside.

"I'm going to try to untie you." She tells him and he shakes his head.

"Willow, lay down." He orders, looking at her with wide eyes. "You need to rest, I can do this." He says and she shakes her head.

"You're hurt. Besides, my hands are in front and I think I've got enough slack to do it." She tells him and he closes his eyes tightly.

"He hurt you." He whispers. "I tried, I tried so hard to protect you and… There's no excuse for this happening, it's on me." He says and she gives up trying to undo the knot and instead grabs his face. She guides it so he looks up at her. She's surprised to see that tears are glistening in his eyes.

"If I don't untie you, he might come back and he might hurt me more." She says and Abel goes limp.

"I'm so sorry, Willow."

"I know. It's ok. Hold still." She orders and he does as told. She picks at the knot fruitlessly, finally getting a nail under one piece and tugging until it loosens. She keeps going with it, occasionally pausing to rest her head on the wall.

"Willow, if you can't get it, just lay down ok?" He requests and she shakes her head, resuming the picking.

"I've got it." She promises and he takes a deep breath.

"How are you doing this?" He asks quietly.

"I'm a Winston. We're stronger than we look." She mutters.

"When you get me free, I'm gonna—" He growls.

"Kill him, I know." Willow interrupts and he looks up at her. "I'm counting on it." A slight smile tweaks his mouth. She forces a smile back and keeps working at the knot.

"Got it?" He asks, trying to pull his hands out and she grunts, pulling the knot a final time and Abel pulls his hands lose. Instantly, he grabs her face and helps support her. She leans into him, exhaustion making her feel like crying. He guides her to the floor and holds her tightly. "I'm gonna kill them. You just wait." He vows harshly and she just closes her eyes.

* * *

"This is going to work?" Willow asks, as he quickly reties the rope around her hands. He looks up at her and nods.

"If it doesn't, if anything happens, you run like hell." He says and she shakes her head.

"No, not without you." She says and he grabs her face.

"Willow, you run. I'm not letting them hurt you anymore. Run. I'll be right behind you." He promises and she nods. Both of them know the other is lying and both accept it. He touches her cheek briefly then grabs the chain they'd managed to dismantle from the wall and waits behind the door. Willow remains seated in the middle of the room, waiting.

They don't have to wait long for the door to open and for Nick to walk in, holding a tray of food. He pauses, looking around. His brow furrows when he doesn't see Abel and he opens his mouth. Abel leaps from behind him, easily wrapping the chain around the shorter man's throat, pulling it tight. Willow watches, unable to look away, as Nick claws at the chain and slowly collapses, Abel behind him, pure fury and hatred etched into his face.

When Nick passes out completely, Abel lets go and tosses the chain aside. Without looking at Willow, he searches him, producing a gun. He flips him over and aims the gun at his face. Shakily, Willow stands and walks over. She holds her hands up and Abel unties her without looking.

"What now?" She asks and he shrugs.

"I can shoot him and we can go look for the other two." He suggests and Willow shakes her head, kneeling and searching for his phone. She produces it from his back pocket and holds it up.

"Call the club." She says. "Better plan." She dials Tig's number and prays to god it works.

"Hello?" He asks harshly and Willow's heart flips.

"Tiggy." She whispers, sobbing.

"Willow? Willow! Where are you, are you hurt?" He demands and she sinks to the floor, covering her mouth. "Willow baby, talk to me."

"I don't where we are, they took Abel too. It was Nick, Nick took us from the party, we were drunk and I'm sorry…"

"Is Abel with you?" He questions, muffled shouting behind him.

"Yes, we're in some sort of warehouse I think. Abel took down Nick but there are at least two other guys here, one's name is Paul but the other guy I don't know… He said the club took his daughter." She babbles and Tig hushes her.

"That's where we thought you were. Willow, baby, we're on our way. We're gonna be there soon. Don't you worry. It's ok. We're coming for you." He reassures her and she hears the roar of motorcycles. "Can you defend yourself?"

"Abel has a gun." She utters.

"Good. Shoot everyone this isn't us. I love you. We're coming for you." He pledges and hangs up.

"They're on their way." She tells Abel, setting the phone on the floor. "Tig says shoot everyone that isn't them." She tells him and Abel spits at the man on the floor, leveling the gun at his head.

"Gladly." He says. They wait in silence until Nick stirs. Abel places his foot on his throat and presses down. Nick splutters, trying to draw a breath and Abel presses harder.

"Abel." She says quietly and he lessens slightly. "Whom are you working for?" She asks Nick, leaning over him so he can see her face.

"No… One." He gasps.

"Paul, who is he?" She asks flatly and he tries to shake his head. "Give me the gun." She orders Abel. Abel looks up in shock, staring at her. She gently probes the blood that's making her mouth taste like metal. Slowly he hands her the gun. She raises it, hand steady, not even a tremble.

"Wills." Abel says quietly, but she pays him no mind.

"Do you know," She asks calmly. "Who my father is?" Nick is silent. "Clearly you don't, because if you did, you would know I'm not scared to do this." She moves the gun and shoots him in the foot. When his scream fades, she turns and hands the gun to Abel. "Now he's going to keep shooting you until you tell me answers." She informs him and he groans, clutching his leg.

"Ethan… Zobelle." He pants.

"Is he here?" Willow asks clearly and Nick shakes his head.

"Left…"

"Is Paul?" She asks and he remains silent and she frowns, stepping on his bullet wound and grinding her heel in it. He howls.

"No, no, he stays with Zobelle!" He hollers.

"So we're alone?" Willow questions and he nods.

"Willow." Abel says softly and she looks at him. "Would you please sit for two seconds? I don't want you to get hurt anymore. I can shoot him." He promises and Willow nods, collapsing in a chair. She closes her eyes and startles awake when she hears loud banging.

Tig is the first one in the room, gun up. He quickly takes in the situation and moves next to Abel, training his gun on Nick. Chibs is next and after he exchanges a nod with Tig, stows his gun and hurries to Willow.

"Oh, feek…" He whispers and she puts her arms up. He picks her up gently, cradling her to his chest. She buries her face in his shoulder as he carries her out into bright sunlight.

"WILLOW!" Lyla screams and Willow bursts into tears. She feels herself being laid down in the backseat and she sits up, panicked.

"Abel!" She cries and Chibs soothes her, stroking her hair.

"Aye, feek, we'll get 'im." He tells her and then she hears her mother sobbing. The car is put in drive and she curls up in a ball. At home, someone moves her into the house and in the bathroom.

"Baby, do you want to shower?" Lyla asks tenderly and Willow nods. Lyla removes her dress and helps her in it. Willow sits on the floor while her mother, still fully clothed, shampoos her hair and gently cleans each cut. When they get out, Lyla tends to her wounds and dresses her in a huge sweatshirt. She guides her to her bedroom where Willow coils into a tight ball. Lyla disappears and returns, something clenched in her hands. Willow looks up slightly and a single tear leaks out when she sees what her mother is offering.

She falls asleep with her father's black knit stocking hat clutched to her chest.

 **AN:** Well, I hope you all liked this chapter, because it might be my favorite that I've written. I promised that this storyline wouldn't drag on, but I'm glad that many of you understood why I took this story in the direction that I did. I'm also glad that so many of you guessed Zobelle- I always waited for him to come back because he was just an awful person. Please, please, please leave me your thoughts on this chapter, I would love to hear them. Thanks for reading!


	40. Chapter 40

"Kill them all." Someone says fiercely. "Find out where he is and bomb everything in proximity. Kill them all."

"No. I want to cut him open myself." Another says and the voices sound oddly muffled. Willow frowns, opening her eyes. Her mother is asleep on the rug on her floor and Ken has his head in his hands, sitting in her chair.

"Ken." She whispers roughly and he looks up. Tears spring to his eyes easily as he crosses the distance and leans over the bed.

"Willow, are you ok? I'm sorry Willow, I let this happen and I shouldn't have." He says, tears falling from his face to the pillow. "I couldn't protect you."

"Abel." She says and he glances at the door.

"Everyone is right outside, waiting for you." He informs her and she nods. "Abel's fine, he's here too." Lyla wakes up and instantly is at Willow's side.

"Nick." She says and a dark look covers his face.

"He's dead." He tells her and she's not sure why she feels numb to this news. "I killed him myself."

"Ken…" She whispers, horrified that she's glad for this fact.

"Should I let the club see you?" He asks, changing the subject and she relaxes into her mother's arms, nodding. He opens the door and they practically spill in, tripping over each other in their haste.

"Willow, are you ok?" Rat asks, closest to her head. She waves a hand.

"Nick told us stuff." She says urgently.

"We know, we know. Ethan Zobelle. Abel told us everything." Happy assures her and she slumps back.

"We're hunting him down right now." Quinn states and she nods, taking a deep breath.

"Can I talk to Abel for a second? Alone?" She requests and they nod.

"We'll visit you later, when we know more." Ken tells her and she nods. They file out, kissing her head or patting her cheek. Last to go is her mother and she stares imploringly at Willow before hugging her tightly.

"I'll bring you food." She tells her, before nodding to Abel and shutting the door. Willow sits against her pillows, shutting her eyes before the tears start. Abel sits on her bed and waits.

"Ken killed him." She whispers and Abel says nothing but nods. "What did you tell them?"

"What Nick told us, what that Zobelle guy said, what they all said."

"Did you tell them what they did?" She asks and he closes his eyes briefly.

"No." He says finally. "Just that we were both beaten. What you're going to tell them is up to you."

"They have that video." Willow reminds him and his shoulders tense. "My brothers can't see that, it'll kill them."

"They won't ever hurt you again." He says and she reaches her hand out so that she can clasp his hands.

"I know." She says quietly. He nods and gets up, heading for the door. "Abel." She calls, as he turns the knob. He looks at her. "It wasn't your fault." She says, wondering if he feels guilt. He bows his head and when he looks up, she's never seen anyone looked so pained.

"No." He whispers, shutting the door. Lyla arrives a little later, with Willow's favorite soup. She eats it before sleeping again. When she wakes this time, it's dark out. She creeps through the house. Lyla and Quinn are at the table when she walks into the kitchen.

"Mom, where's Ellie?" She asks, the question the most important thing on her mind. Lyla covers her mouth with a trembling hand.

"Ellie is with the club." She admits and Willow stares at her, confused. "When she heard what happened, where they found you and Abel… She told Tig that she would ride Gavin's bike and carry her gun and if anyone told her no, she'd shoot them." Despite all the shock and trauma from the last 24 hours, Willow manages a smile at the idea of Ellie fighting with Tig.

"Where's the club?" She asks and Lyla looks to Quinn.

"We got a couple leads on Zobelle, so we're running those down." He tells her and she nods.

"Are you hungry? What do you need?" Lyla asks and Willow wraps her arms around herself tightly, thinking but unwilling to admit that what she needs is a tall, blond man.

"I just want to rest." She says before flinching. Lyla narrows her eyes and shoos Quinn away.

"Willow… The men… They didn't…" She says, dismayed, catching Willow's arm. Willow bites her lip.

"Don't tell the guys." She whispers and Lyla looks as though she's ready to sob again. Then, suddenly, it as though someone has poured steel through her veins. She helps Willow back to bed, a hard expression on her face. A couple minutes later, a couple girls from Red Woody arrive.

"The club is going to kill whoever did this, right?" Jaycee, Quinn's girlfriend asks Lyla, who nods. "Good. Then I'll make sure they're good and dead." She promises, before kissing Willow's head. "Baby, this is going to help." She says, producing a jar. "We're going to help." She says, gesturing to the rest of the girls. They all nod. Willow looks at her, bewildered.

"How do you know this?" She asks and Jaycee bites the inside of her lip.

"Willow, there's a lot of times where things like this happen to our girls. We've learned to patch them up." She tells her and Willow grabs her mother's hand. Lyla holds her tightly.

She eats again and Quinn leaves, replaced by Bowen, who looks positively furious that he is out of the action. She falls asleep again and is woken multiple times from nightmares. Her mother must hear her calling out, because at some point she is offered strong sleeping pills and she takes them.

 **AN:** Well, happy Monday and happy update. I loved the feedback I got from you guys last chapter and I'm glad that you're liking it. Please favorite, follow, share with friends, all that good stuff. Thank you for reading and being awesome, please review!


	41. Chapter 41

She checks her phone, returned to her along with her purse from the club. It's full of messages from Jordan and Camila, who must've been told via Bowen as they talk of supporting her and being ready to talk whenever she's ready. She ignores them. They are for another day. She debates calling Abel, but figures that he will contact her. She changes, trying not to look at herself in the mirror, before heading downstairs.

"Hey Willow." Piper says, jumping up and kissing her cheek.

"I want to go to the clubhouse." She states and Piper nods.

"I can take her there." He tells her and Lyla hesitates.

"I need to stop by a greenhouse first." She tells them and they look at her curiously but a couple minutes later, they're in the car, on their way. At the store Willow gets gloves and a spade, soil, a watering can, and several potted flowers, all with large and colorful blossoms.

"Gonna tell me your plan?" Piper asks, once they're finally driving towards the clubhouse. She shakes her head and Piper doesn't push. Once they get there, he helps her unload everything.

"I want to make a little garden." She states, gesturing to the grass patch by TM. Piper puts his hands up. She kneels in the dirt and begins to dig. The sun beats on her back, making her sweat but she digs away furiously, only turning gentle when she has to place the plants in their new holes. She's aware that Tig has arrived and is standing watch over her, without saying a word.

"Hey." Abel says quietly to Tig. "Can I talk to her?"

"Willow baby?" Tig calls.

"It's ok Tiggy." She responds, starting on her next hole. Tig bends down to kiss her head before walking towards the clubhouse.

"Why does Tig protect you like that?" Abel asks her quietly. Willow gently brushes off her hands, setting aside the flowers.

"He had a daughter once. Two actually. Dawn and Fawn. I told you about Fawn but Dawn was killed and Tig couldn't save her. I remind him of her, I suppose. At least, he sees me as another little girl to protect." She says quietly. Abel takes that in for a second then twists to give her a confused look.

"How do you know that?" He demands and Willow gives him a lopsided smile.

"Anyone admits anything when they're two bottles of vodka in and you're trying to get them to bed."

"Well, I wanted to see how you're doing." He says awkwardly and she pats the ground next to her. He sits heavily.

"I'm gonna be ok." She says and he gives her a sidelong look. "I am." She insists. "I don't remember what happened and I think that's ok, because I know it happened but I don't know what he did. Once I know he's dead, I'll be ok."

"We are going to kill him." Abel says, his voice hard.

"I know." Willow says softly. "You know, a couple days ago I hated this club and how violence is the norm. But now that I know it's to protect me, somehow I'm grateful for it." She glances at him and he's staring at the flowers. "Are you ok?" She asks, bumping his shoulder.

"I had to watch it all, you know." He says, not looking at her. "I had to watch him do that to you and I couldn't do a damn thing. And I've decided I'm never going to be that helpless again Willow." He vows and she rests her head on his shoulder. After a second, he rests his head on top of hers.

They finish planting the flowers together then head into the clubhouse to wash up. Inside, Ellie is perched onto of a table, talking loudly on a cellphone. At the sight of Willow, she hangs up and pulls her into a fierce hug. Willow feels the tears come up, but none fall. She's done crying. They say nothing to each other, but when Ellie pulls back, Willow sees the fire in her eyes and they nod. She and Abel stand next to each other at the sink, washing their hands.

Willow takes a second to look him over. His face is still covered in bruises but they look like they're healing. He still seems to favor his right leg and flinches when some water splashes up on his exposed arm, also covered in cuts and bruises. He shuts off the water and reaches for the towel behind her. She looks up at him.

"Abel. Thank you." She says softly and he gazes down at her, the towel apparently forgotten.

"For what?" He asks, eyebrows furrowed.

"You saved me." She points out and he opens his mouth. She puts her hand over it. "No, don't do that. You did. I wouldn't have gotten out of there if it weren't for you. And I'm grateful that someone else was there and I'm glad it was you." He bows his head at her words and unbidden; she stretches up on her toes so she can kiss his forehead.

"C'mon." He says roughly, setting the towel aside and walking with her out of the bathroom. They round the corner and Abel stops dead in his tracks. Willow walks into his and stumbles back, looking at him curiously. He's staring at a blonde woman in the center of the room, talking quickly to Tig. She has a firm grip on the boy next to her, who's tall, blond, and looking about curiously.

"Wendy." Chibs says loudly, gesturing to Abel. Wendy looks up and her face crumples with relief. She runs for Abel and grabs him in a tight hug, swaying on the spot. Abel kisses her head, holding her close.

"You look awful." The boy next to her says, regarding Abel and he lets Wendy go, seizing him too.

"Shut up Tommy." He says gruffly and Willow stares in shock. Thomas Teller. His younger brother. Thomas stares back at her, head cocked to one side curiously, as though he can't place her.

"Are you ok?" Wendy asks, turning his face this way and that so she can assess the damage. He nods. "Who did this?" She asks, turning back to Tig and Happy. They tear their eyes off Thomas and back to her.

"Maybe we should explain the whole situation to you." Happy suggests, gesturing to a table. She nods, going to sit. Then she turns around and points to her sons.

"Watch your brother." She orders and it's unclear to who she's referring. Both nod and she follows the club to the table, smiling and hugging Rat, staring outright at Ken and Piper.

"I gotta call my mom." Willow says, awed.

"Already on it." Ellie says, phone tucked between her ear and shoulder. "Ellie Winston, I changed your diapers." She says, sticking her hand out to Thomas. He shakes it, looking slightly confused.

"I should explain shit to him." Abel mutters, catching Thomas's arm and pulling him towards quiet. Willow nods, wandering with Ellie back outside. She sits in her new garden while Ellie talks to their mother. Minutes later, Lyla pulls up and joins them. She kisses Willow's head then talks lowly to Ellie before striding into the clubhouse with purpose.

"Well, I didn't expect an old crow eater to return to Charming with the other prince." Ellie says thoughtfully and Willow squints at her.

"Please don't tell me that's what they're calling Abel." She pleads faintly and Ellie shrugs.

"Not to his face maybe but it's implied." She says and Willow sighs. "He'll be SAMCRO Willow, I don't know how you don't see that."

"I thought he wouldn't be." Willow says quietly. "When he first came, I was so convinced that he wouldn't go. He didn't seem interested. I thought he wasn't a biker. But then that night when that guy broke into our house… I saw a different side of him. I saw the SAMCRO side of him." She trails off and Ellie raises an eyebrow. Willow sits her head on her knees.

"And you saw the SAMCRO side of yourself these past couple days." She informs her and Willow looks up, startled. "Abel told us that you shot Nick in the foot and that it was your idea that he choke him with the chain." Willow opens her mouth to protest and Ellie shakes her head. "And I am so, so thankful for whatever it is you had to do to get out of there." She says thickly and Willow scoots so she's leaning against her sister. Ellie just kisses her head.

"So what's going on?" Willow asks Bowen inquiringly, watching as Wendy talks with the club, waving her hands. Bowen chuckles, taking a drink of his beer.

"That one…" He says, an admiring look in his eyes. "I can tell where Abel gets it from, I can tell ya that much." Willow watches as Wendy narrows her eyes at Tig then nods.

"She looks intense." She observes.

"She is." Bowen agrees solemnly and they watch until everyone stands, pushing chairs back. They split off and Wendy heads to the bar, her vision looked on Willow, who appraises her. She pauses in front of Willow.

"Wendy." She says, offering Willow her hand. "Wendy Case. Abel's mom." Willow shakes it, wide eyed.

"Willow. Winston." She says haltingly.

"I know." Wendy says with a small smile. "You look a lot like your mom, but you've got Opie in you." She says and Willow is reeling. "Thank you, for getting my son through that."

"He saved me." Willow says automatically and Wendy shakes her head.

"Whatever it was, you're both safe and I'm glad for it." She says quietly then looks at Willow oddly. "Are you two together?"

"What? No." Willow says instantly, surprised. Wendy smiles slightly.

"I just ask because when I asked him to come home, he said he has to stay here and protect you." She reveals and Willow leans around her to stare Abel, who's pointing to their father's mugshot for Thomas.

"I didn't know." She says lamely and Wendy smiles.

"He's more like his father every day." She muses then touches Willow's arm and walks toward her boys.

 **AN:** Wendy is back! I love Wendy. I love her character arch. I love everything about SOA. And I love the idea of her coming back to Charming with her two boys, because in my mind, she would raise and love Thomas like Tara raised and loved Abel. Ok, now I'm rambling. Please ramble back to me in reviews, I would love to hear your thoughts!


	42. Chapter 42

**AN:** This chapter is for my Hurricane, who inspired the 'happy at me' line. I love you and I'm sorry you don't see me unless it's 1 am and everyone is screaming and I'm trying to keep your world normal. I can't wait to watch you grow up, Punk.

"C'mon, lunch at Brooke's." Ellie says, catching her arm.

"Is everyone there?" Willow asks and Ellie gives her a look.

"Of course they are, the club has been on lockdown the second we realized you were missing. Everyone is there though. The kids just think it's one big summer sleepover." She says ruefully.

"Well, they're not wrong." Willow mutters. When they pull up, there aren't any kids in the driveway. They walk in and are instantly greeted with Montez, who nods and steps aside.

"Under watch 24 hours a day." Ellie says lowly. Inside the kitchen, the women greet Willow with hugs.

"Willy-Bear!" Autumn yells, running around the corner, waving a piece of paper in her hand. She skids to a stop and thrusts the paper at her, grinning. Willow takes it curiously and opens it up. It's got scribbles in bright colors and in the bottom, in Jaycee's neat handwriting, is 'get better soon Willow! We love you!' and what looks like Autumn's messy signature.

"We told her you and Abel crashed a bike." Jaycee explains lowly and Willow covers her mouth, kneeling down and pulling Autumn into a tight hug.

"Are you happy at me, Willy?" She wonders aloud, squirming slightly so she can touch Willow's face.

"So happy." She says, trying to stop the tears. Autumn lets her hug her for a while longer then wriggles away and runs for Kalli.

"The older kids know that you and Abel were taken." Brooke says, handing her a sandwich. "Isaias and up. We told the rest you were in an accident." Willow nods and leans against her slightly. Jaycee hands her Abrielle.

"Go nap with her." She offers and Willow gladly sneaks into the bedroom, cuddling Abrielle close.

* * *

"Can I go home for the night?" Willow asks Brooke, who looks up from the table where she's deep in conversation with Wendy.

"Rat said yes, but wait until your brothers come. They'll take you and your mom home." She promises.

"Where are you guys staying?" Willow asks Wendy, wondering where Abel will be. Wendy smiles at Brooke.

"Right here." She says. "I've got a couple kids to get to know." Willow nods, thinking about how if it was weird for Abel to come back, it must be even weirder for Wendy. She wanders out back, where Thomas is showing Cruz, Rang, and Ryder how to wield a lacrosse stick. He's bouncing a ball off the wall of the house while the rest of kids laugh and play in the fading sunset.

"Strange, isn't it." Abel says from behind her and she glances at him. He's watching as Thomas hands off the stick to Ryder, who screws his face up in concentration, flinging the ball wildly at the wall. Thomas jumps to catch it, laughing and correcting Ryder.

"What, that this is what it might have been like if you stayed here?" Willow asks and he nods. "I think you would've been different people."

"Really?" He asks her and she shrugs.

"I would be a different person if I wasn't raised SAMCRO." She says and he's quiet. Then he puts an arm around her shoulders.

"I'm glad for exactly who you are." He mutters.

"Are you escorting me home too?" She asks him, when he gathers up his things and walks with her to her mother's car.

"Yeah, I figured since half the club is staying here tonight I could help Piper and Ken watch your house." He says, helping her in. She looks at him, surprised, but doesn't say anything. When they get home, Ken and Piper search it then let them in. Willow changes into pajamas and gets ready for bed.

"Hey, c'mere for a second." She says to Abel, signaling for him to come into her room. He does, frowning.

"What's wrong?" He asks and she sits on her bed.

"How close are you guys to finding this guy?" She asks him and he wavers for a moment. "Abel." She says firmly and he sighs.

"Close. Tig thinks that he's hiding out in a hotel in Stockton. We're riding tomorrow to try and scope it out. We're planning on taking him there." He says and she nods, looking at her shaking hands.

"Will you let me know what happens?" She asks, her voice trembling.

"Of course." Abel says instantly and she raises her eyes to his.

"And you save Paul for me." She says harshly and Abel looks at her for a long moment then nods. She bobs her head and leans forward, kissing his cheek. "Thank you." He looks surprised, but gets up and leaves.

 **AN:** I am so so sorry that this chapter is short, but it's for dual reasons- I am traveling all over trying to watch my siblings in their various sporting events which leaves little time to thinking about this story sadly and also because I can't upload longer chapters without my laptop freezing- does anyone know a solution? Have a good weekend and please review!


	43. Chapter 43

In the morning, Willow greets her watcher for the day, Bowen, pours herself a large bowl of cereal, then pulls a stack of cards towards her. Bowen looks over her shoulder curiously.

"Whatcha doin'?" He asks and she shows him a card.

"Writing thank you's." She says when he stares at, uncomprehending. "From my party." She clarifies and he frowns.

"Why?" He asks.

"Because it's the polite thing to do and it's not like I can go anywhere else today. Go get me baskets so I can sort these by addresses or charters." She orders and he hurries to do as told. Willow tries to use this distraction to keep her mind from wondering what's going on in Stockton. She jumps when the phone rings- just Lyla checking in and telling Willow to switch the laundry. She works steadily through the cards, making Bowen and herself lunch and resuming.

"Willow." Bowen says, walking back into the kitchen. She glances up and he's giving her an odd look, his face frozen in shock.

"Bo, is everything ok?" She asks, alarmed.

"They… Want us." He says and she frowns.

"The club?" She asks and he nods. She puts everything away then looks at her. He's still staring at her with the same strange expression. "Seriously, is everything ok?" She demands.

"Wills…" He says softly, pulling her face into her chest. "Ah, Wills, I'm so sorry…" He tangles his hand in her hair and she hugs him back, unsure.

"What?" She asks him and he shakes his head, walking for his bike. When they pull into the club, Abel is running towards her. She's hardly off the bike when he grabs her forearms, looking wildly down at her.

"I'm sorry." He says instantly and she just looks at him, uncomprehending. "The tape… They have the tape. The tape was at the hotel, not Zobelle." He says and her stomach drops out from underneath her. She wobbles and Abel and Bowen catch her.

"Let me go." She says dully. They wait until she can support herself and she walks on numb legs into the clubhouse. The entire club is gathered around the table and she steels herself before walking in. All conversation dies off and they turn to look at her.

"Wills…" Happy says quietly and she ignores him, reaching forward and picking up the DVD case on the table.

"This…" She starts emotionlessly. "Has a video of my rape on it." The reaction is instantaneous. Half the club jumps out of their seats, the other half slump down, covering their faces. She feels Abel stand behind and she takes a deep breath. "I didn't tell you because I thought it would hurt you all and not make it better. I was right. If you all lose your cool over this, you might make mistakes. Someone might get hurt. And I do not want that."

"Willow, baby…" Tig says, looking at the disk, appalled. "Is that why you said we shouldn't watch it?" He asks Abel, who nods.

"You shouldn't. It's nothing that any of you need to see. I am here now and I'm fine." She states. "The tape is irrelevant. You catch this guy; my life is back to normal. I want it back to normal, now. I start work this Friday if you want to work out people watching me. Otherwise, I'll leave you to finding them." She says, nodding at them all.

"Willow." Chibs calls and she looks to him. "Ya can't start workin' till we 'ave this guy." He says and she quirks an eyebrow.

"That man Zobelle said I wasn't anything special, not when he found a Teller. So really, I think you should be watching out for Abel and Thomas." She says, struggling not to sound icy.

"We are. That's why we called Wendy home." Rat tells her and she glances at him. He looks at her sadly.

"Can ya just… Agree ta let us come with ya?" Chibs requests and she nods. He relaxes slightly.

"Willow…" Tig says, standing and opening his arms. She buries her head in his chest, breathing in the familiar scent of cigarettes and aftershave.

"Please don't say I'm sorry." She implores. "I'm so sick of people telling me that they're sorry." He kisses her head.

"I am sorry. But I'm also gonna tell you that when we find him, we'll make sure he regrets every second he put his hands on you." He declares. "Get her home safe." He instructs Bowen and Abel, who nod. Willow walks with them out and freezes when she hears the sound of Piper screaming and a sob from Ken.

"C'mon." Abel says gently, taking her elbow. "Let's go home."

"You should be with your family." She says impassively and he tucks her into his side.

"They're ok. I think you might need it a little more." He says and she doesn't have the energy to refute it.

 **AN:** Ok again, sorry sorry sorry for the short chapter, life has still been crazy but getting better. I promise the next ones will be longer. Please leave me reviews, let me know what you think, I love to hear feedback. Thanks for reading!


	44. Chapter 44

"Who's my guard today?" She calls through the open bathroom door, pulling up her shirt and inspecting her bruises. Most of them have faded to a nice purple or yellow, but they still stand out against her pale skin. She sighs and puts the shirt down, grabbing a water bottle and walking into the kitchen.

"That would be me." Bowen says grumpily and she rolls her eyes.

"Won't it be a little obvious, a guy sitting at the pool all day?" She points out and he points to Jaycee's car pulling into the driveway. "I thought we were trying to protect all the kids in the club."

"Well, they're getting stir crazy with everyone hovering and at least there we can watch you and them." Lyla explains and Willow makes a face. "How are your bruises?" She asks and Willow shrugs.

"I can cover them with my shirt." She says, flapping her oversized sleeves and Bowen raises an eyebrow. "What, hopefully it'll be cold enough to keep it on." She says defensively.

"Wills, it's California. In June." He says flatly and she throws her hands up before Jaycee walks in with all the kids.

"Are we gonna go swimming?" Kalli asks, bouncing up and down excitedly. Bowen groans and lifts her onto his lap. She quiets, staring at him seriously.

"Aye." He says gravely. "But ya know what the rules are?" She glances at her mom then shakes her head. "Ya got ta listen ta me. Cause if someone bad is there, I got ta protect ya." The older kids shift slightly but Kalli nods, clapping her hands. He grins and pats her head.

"Ok, go change. Swimsuits on everyone." Jaycee orders and they scramble, slamming doors. "I'll drop them off when the pool opens. You're driving Willow?" She asks Bowen, who nods.

"Jesus Christ." She curses. "I thought we established that I'm not in that much danger anymore. That Abel is in more danger than me." She demands of Bowen.

"He's riding with Tig to take Wendy and Thomas back home, where the nearest charter is gonna watch them." Lyla reminds her and she flinches slightly. Abel had left the day before and Willow hadn't been able to ask anyone if he had promised to come back. She runs a hand through her hair, frustrated, then throws her hands up and heads for the door.

"Well, c'mon then daddy, time to drop your daughter off at the pool." She mocks, slipping on her shoes.

"Don't… Don't call me daddy." Bowen begs, grabbing his helmet.

"What is this?" Melanie demands when Willow jogs into work. She not looking at Willow both rather Bowen with narrowed eyes. Willow suppresses a grin. Her boss, only a couple years older than her, has a dislike for Bowen's cocky attitude and anything else SOA.

"I can explain." She says, putting her hands up. "The club is just being a little… Protective. It's ok, he's going to watch the rest of the kids today." She promises and Melanie looks at her then Bowen.

"No club shit." She orders, pointing at him. He nods.

"But I 'ave ta ask ya, not ta let in any guys without kids, older, with tattoos—" She cuts him off with a deadly stare.

"We do like to keep the pedophiles out, thanks." She says harshly.

"I'm gonna go get ready." Willow says, inching away. She'd seen Bowen and Melanie fight before and it could swing from bad to worse. She walks inside, smiling at her fellow lifeguards.

"Nice shirt." Kara, a girl two years younger than her says with a smile. Willow grins at her- she knows Kara is good friends with Rang. Willow waves her arm, making the sleeves flap again. It's one of Ken's old ones, clearly embossed with SAMCRO on the front and the anarchy symbol on the back. Melanie walks in, face stormy and they all straighten up.

"Alright, here's the rotation." She says shortly and Willow suppresses a groan. Melanie has her on slide duty, one hated by all guards for the likelihood of having to jump in and grab kids unable to swim out of the currant. Starting on that spot means she will be there three times in a day, instead of two like everyone else.

"First day of work, unlucky break." Kara mutters.

"Not unlucky, very much plotted." Willow says quietly, grabbing a rescue tube and walking with Kara across the pool deck. Kara looks at her, confused. Willow points to Bowen, sitting outside and waiting for Jaycee.

"What is a Son doing here?" Kara asks, perplexed.

"You'll be getting some of my lovely littles later today." Willow informs her and Kara brightens.

"Oh good, I want to see if Autumn has gotten any better from last years swimming lessons." She says happily.

"You can, if you're trying not too busy trying to make sure Cruz doesn't drown Isiais." She points out and Kara groans, climbing the ladder to her chair. Willow grins and makes her way to the bottom of the slide.

"HI WILLOW!" Kalli yells, but she knows better than to try and hug Willow while she's working. When there are no kids on the slide, Willow watches her extended family run around with a small smile on her face.

"Hey." She says to Bowen, walking up to him on her break. He's toweling off Autumn, who's eating a Popsicle with wide eyes.

"Hullo." He says, tying Autumn's towel tightly around her shoulders and sending her on her way.

"They must be ready to go soon." She says, noting how Kalli is leaning heavily against Neva.

"Aye." He agrees. "When ya done with work?"

"8." She says and he frowns, checking his watch. 5:24.

"I can't leave ya fer two an' a half hours." He protests and she looks at him pointedly, gesturing to the busy pool.

"No one is going to be able to snatch a lifeguard without someone noticing. We close at 8 and I have to clean up after work. Send someone at 8 and I'll be out by 8:15ish." She promises, reaching down and kissing Kalli's head.

"Ok." He agrees then signals for Rang and Cruz to round up the kids. Willow kisses each kid as they file past, even the older boys who make faces and try to fend it off. She watches them go with a smile.

"Should I be worried that you have a club detail on you at all times?" Melanie snaps, as Willow grabs a broom and the sound of a motorcycle roars into the parking lot. She checks to clock. 8:01.

"Alright, alright. I told the club that I'm going off to college this fall and they're just making sure I remember where I come from." She lies easily.

"Willow, that's great. I'm so proud of you!" Melanie says happily, hugging her. Willow accepts the hug for a long moment then takes the broom and goes to sweep the deck.

When she walks out of work, Happy is perched on his bike, waiting for her. She smiles and waves, getting in her car. He follows her all the way home, pausing when she walks down the driveway to the road.

"Hey, Hap…" She says slowly and he shuts off the bike, looking at her. "Are you guys any closer to… Catching this guy?" She asks and Happy stares at her evenly.

"Willow." He says. "We're getting closer. We've got you protected, is that what you're worried about?" She shakes her head.

"No, I feel safe… I just… I want to know they're gone." She whispers and he grabs the back of her head, drawing her close so he can kiss her forehead.

"And we will kill them and everything will be ok." Willow smiles twistedly at the warped comfort this gives her. Maybe she is more like her father than she wants to admit.

 **AN:** Filler chapter, I know, but the action is coming back soon. To those who celebrate it, have a lovely Thanksgiving and please leave me reviews- I'm always thankful for them!


	45. Chapter 45

"I've got some good news for you." Ellie tells her, making her lunch before work. Willow is scrutinizing her bruises, noting that she should be able to wear her two-piece guard suit today without raising too many questions.

"What?" She asks distractedly, replying to Jordan's message.

"Abel's going to be back tomorrow." Ellie says and she nearly drops her phone. She looks up, trying to look dismissive.

"So?" She asks and Ellie gives her a look over her shoulder.

"Don't so me. I've seen you two together. He likes you." She insists and Willow rolls her eyes.

"Ellie, he does not like me." She protests and Ellie hands her a glass of water.

"He does, I'm telling you that. I'm an expert." She says and Willow makes a face at her back.

"Ellie, he's just a friend. A good friend." She amends.

"Willow." Ellie says softly. "You didn't see him after we found you two. He was… Devastated. He kept saying how sorry he was, that he couldn't protect you, how he wished it was him…"

"Everyone says that." Willow denies. "Who's going to say, 'oh I'm so glad it was you who was kidnapped and beaten and raped'?" Ellie looks down, tears in her eyes and Willow wants to feel bad but her heart is racing.

"Willow, I didn't mean it like that." She says quietly and Willow shovels food in her mouth so she doesn't have to talk. "I just mean, there's a guy that feels bad and then there's a guy that would rather have chopped off his left limb than let that happen to you." She says and Willow checks her phone.

"Well, it looks like its time for me to go." She says hastily, bolting out the door. Piper is her escort today and he waits until she's inside the pool to leave.

"Still locked down?" Melanie asks and Willow smiles brightly.

"No, just Piper being my brother." She says airily and Melanie purses her lips but walks away.

* * *

"Looks like your ride home is here." Melanie says as Willow picks leaves and hair out of the filter, gagging.

"Thanks." She gasps, retching as she pulls a particularly large hairball out. She makes Kara spray her off with the hose afterwards and walks to her car in her swimsuit, clothes in her backpack. She looks up to wave to whoever's driving her home and trips on the curb leading to the parking lot. Abel gets off his bike, laughing.

"Easy there." He calls, walking towards her and she wonders in the corner of her mind that isn't completely blank why every time he comes back to Charming, she's in so little clothing.

"I thought you weren't allowed around on your own." She says, once he's in range to speak quietly.

"It's been nearly two weeks." He says, just as quiet. "The club has a pretty solid lead that he's hiding out somewhere up in NorCal using connections there."

"How far NorCal is NorCal?" Willow asks suspiciously.

"Far enough that he's nowhere hear here." He promises. "And if he moves, we'll know about it."

"So why can't you just go up there and kill him?" She complains and he raises an eyebrow.

"We're getting to it Willow." He says and she nods, walking back to her car. She glances back and he's watching her, a closed expression on his face. He follows her home then joins Ken in riding for the club. Willow walks in, unsurprised to see Piper still eating.

"How do you eat more than anyone I know and still stay so small?" She complains and he shrugs.

"Cause you guys have mom's genes. She's tiny and she always has been." Ellie comments and Willow looks at her sister. Ellie has curves in all the right places, rather than Willow's long and somewhat gangly limbs.

"I just wish I had your boobs." She says sadly and Piper throws down his fork disgustedly.

"Well, thanks." He says sarcastically. "Now I can't finish my supper."

"Since when does talking about boobs ruin your appetite?" Ellie scoffs as Willow chuckles.

"When it's about my sisters!" Piper protests. "Where's Ken, we're going to meet at the club."

"He already left with Abel." Willow informs him and he rolls his eyes.

"Neither of them have any patience whatsoever." He grumbles. "Abel was jumpy enough this afternoon. I thought he was going to go the pool at like 5 he was so eager." From behind Piper, Ellie raises an eyebrow. Willow sticks her tongue out. Piper continues his rant, despite the fact that neither of his sisters is interested and finishes by slamming the door.

"Told you." Ellie says instantly and Willow rolls his eyes.

"So he came and picked me up. That's a duty the club has been rotating for the last week. I'm pretty sure it's just whoever picks the short straw." She says indifferently and Ellie throws her hands up.

"Someone that impatient to see you doesn't view it as a chore." She tells her and Willow sighs, leaning against the doorframe.

"I'm gonna shower." She tells Ellie.

"Willow, why can't you admit that he might like you?" Ellie demands and Willow feels rage bubble up.

"Because he watched me get raped Ellie." She spits and Ellie looks crestfallen. "I'm pretty sure a guy doesn't want to date the girl he watched get raped by some fat old guy." With that, she turns on her heel and heads for the shower.

 **AN:** Filler chapter, I know, I know! I'm a day late on updating, I know, I know! Holidays are crazy and busy and involve way too much time with family, but I promise I will have a longer and more exciting chapter Monday- if you leave reviews, I would love to read them!


	46. Chapter 46

"Well, what should we do?" Willow pauses at her mother's door, about to knock and go in. "Send her to therapy?"

"No…" Ellie replies and Willow leans against the wall, carefully minding that they can't see her outline or shadow. "Willow would never talk to anyone about this. You engrained that club shit deep."

"Well, my daughter was raped. I think she has a right to her mental health over the club." Lyla says harshly and it sounds as though Ellie is pacing.

"I know she needs to see them dead." She says. "I honestly think that'll help. But I can sense her getting angrier every day and who can blame her? I'd be pissed too. God I wish there was something we could do." She says, frustrated.

"We support her." Lyla says comfortingly. "That's what I needed when it happened to me. I just wanted someone there to remind me constantly that I would get through this and the end would be brighter."

"What was brighter?" Ellie asks her and Lyla is quiet for a moment.

"Willow turned 2. And the night of her birthday she looked at me and said that all day she saw her daddy. When I asked her where, she said he was in the kisses everyone gave her. That it was always daddy kissing her. And then she kissed me and went to bed and I knew that life was going to be ok again." Willow slides down the wall, trying not to cry.

* * *

"Willow, we picked swimming lesson ages groups." Kara tells her as she skids into the office, barely on time.

"Oh no." She says worriedly. "Melanie gave me a terrible group didn't she? Punishment since I'm late."

"Level 5." Kara says sympathetically and Willow groans dramatically.

"Bright side, we're partners." Devon calls across the room.

"We're gonna have fun, we've got Isaias and Zane." She says, consulting the list of names on the paper.

"And a bunch of other snot nosed 8 to 10 year olds." He says. "At least you can control those two."

"Somewhat." She grumbles.

"Look lively, kids are coming in!" Melanie calls and Willow resigns herself to certain doom. They face the crowd. Zane and Isaias stand next to each other wearing identical innocent smiles.

"I'm just thankful that Rang and Cruz are done." She mutters and Devon snorts, trying to compose himself. Melanie calls out names and their different age levels with different guards- Autumn and Kalli excitedly bound after Kara, clutching hands. Finally, she calls,

"Level 5!" Willow and Devon step up, waving. "Isaias Lowman, Zane Skogstrom—" Both walk toward Willow calmly as Melanie reads the other names and Willow narrows her eyes. Once all the names have been called, they lead their kids to the deep end. As Devon gives out instructions, Willow stares down Isaias and Zane, arms folded.

"Ok, everyone jump in!" Devon says and everyone leaps into the water, except Isaias and Zane.

"Scared?" Willow taunts.

"Actually, we can dive, so can we do that instead?" Zane sasses and Willow takes a deep breath then shoves them in. They come up spluttering.

"You two are not going to be little shits." She says flatly, crouching down so that they can see her face better. "Any lip, any sass, and I'll tell Happy. And I bet he'll have some creative punishments lined up." She threatens and they both nod seriously, looking chastised. Willow nods for Devon to continue and he grins.

"Oh my god, how do you deal with them on a daily basis?" Devon marvels as they put away kickboards.

"With a lot of threats and bribes." Willow says with a little laugh, falling in step with him as they file out of the pool.

"Really?" He asks, looking at her. She nods.

"Lately, all I have to do is threaten to tell their dads, but that'll wear off soon enough." She says. "At least, it did with Rang and Cruz."

"You poor thing." He says, shaking his head. "I'll see you Monday?" He calls, unlocking his car and she nods, waving. She turns and sees Abel is watching with a frown.

"Hey." She says, walking over.

"Who's that?" He asks gruffly and she looks over her shoulder, looking at Devon's car then back at him.

"Who, Devon?" She asks, bewildered. He nods curtly and she laughs slightly. "Oh, he's just another lifeguard. I teach lessons with him." She says cheerfully.

"Do you really think that's wise?" He asks her and she looks at him, taken aback. "Talking to him?"

"It's not like I'm dating him or something." She says, annoyed. "I teach lessons with him, we have Zane and Isaias in our class, we were just discussing that. I've known him since 7th grade."

"And you knew Nick for ages too." He points out and she feels like she's been plunged into icy water.

"You don't think I don't know that?" She asks from between gritted teeth. "I remember that every day."

"I'm just saying, you shouldn't trust anyone but SAMCRO." He says and she gawks at him.

"Are you kidding me?" She demands and he looks at her balefully. "You're the one who came in here talking about how all you wanted was to learn about your dad and leave! You were all 'I'm not a biker! I'm not putting on a kutte'. And now you're telling me to trust only SAMCRO? You're not even SAMCRO!" She says, enraged and he fires up as well.

"I think you should trust the guy that went through that shit with you!" He says heatedly. "I was right there Willow, not anyone else."

"I know you were." She hisses, poking him hard in the chest. "And then what happened? You left. You went home with mommy and Tommy and didn't bother to see if I was ok, what I felt, nothing. I have no idea where I stand with you, Abel Teller." He opens his mouth to respond but his phone rings and with narrowed eyes, he answers.

"Hello?" He listens to whoever is on the other end with wide eyes, darting back and forth from his bike to Willow. She watches, intrigued as what could interrupt their argument. "Got it." He says, hanging up and looking up at Willow. "Do you have a change of clothes?" He asks and she furrows her eyebrows.

"Yeah, of course, but—"

"Go put it on." He interrupts her and she looks at him blankly. "Go!" He orders and she heads back into the locker room, pulling shorts and a tank top out of her backpack and peeling off her wet suit. "Throw it in your car and get on my bike." He yells when she walks out.

"Abel, what's going on?" She asks and he just hands her a helmet, buckling his own. "Is everyone ok?" She demands, refusing to get on the bike.

"They found them. They're at a warehouse in Oakland. Do you want to go or not?" He presses her and she buckles her helmet and grabs his waist tightly as he roars out of the parking lot. She knows they're speeding but she just presses her face in Abel's back to protect herself from the wind.

 **AN:** Back to reality, which means back to homework and stress... But also back to updates! Hopefully that means back to reviews? You guys are awesome, thanks for reading!


	47. Chapter 47

Flashes of that night keep coming back to her, just bits and pieces. The grunt Abel made whenever a blow struck him. How the room in which they were held was damp and smelled musty. How the rough rope had made her wrists itch. She squeezes her eyes tighter before she can remember how it felt to have that weight on her, suffocating her.

Abel navigates them into the rundown side of Oakland, where the buildings are in disrepair and look as though teenage vandals get to them nightly. He seems to know where he's going automatically, because he doesn't stop to ask her any questions. Finally, they head down a narrow alley and emerge into a tiny parking lot, where other bikes are parked.

"Wait." She gasps, as Abel gets off the bike and heads towards the warehouse, eyes blazing. He looks around in concern and grabs her arm.

"Willow, it's going to be ok. I'm here." He promises and she nods, resting her head on his chest briefly. "You good?" He asks when she looks up and she nods. "Ok, let's go make good on my promise." They walk into the warehouse, hand in hand. They make their way through a maze of rooms, finally finding the club. A line of reapers face Willow and she feels an immense sense of comfort from them. Always there to protect her.

"Guys." Bowen says lowly, spotting them first and the line breaks as they turn around and look at them. They step aside and Willow feels her stomach turn. Two men are tied to chairs in the middle of the room, heads down, bloodied. She wants to take a step back but Abel puts a steady hand on her shoulder.

"Do you know who they are?" Tig asks loudly, gesturing with his knife. "The kids you stole. They're here to do to you what you did to them. And then, because you fucked with them, we're going to kill you!" He spits on the men with disgust. "We should've killed you when we had the chance."

"Why didn't you?" Willow demands, her fury rising again.

"We 'ad ta go ta Ireland and get Abel back." Chibs says and Abel looks at him in confusion.

"What do you mean, get me back from Ireland?" He asks and Happy shakes him head.

"Another time, another time." He says, pointing his gun at Zobelle. "Let's make them bleed."

"No, he's for Abel." Rat says, nudging Happy's shoulder.

"And he's for Willow." Ken says vehemently, gesturing to Paul, who can't even raise his head. Abel sets his mouth and draws a knife from his boot. Willow is horrified but unable to look away as he painstakingly slashes Zobelle's chest open. When he finally leans back, satisfied with his work, Zobelle is bloody and his breathing ragged.

"Willow." Tig says quietly, shielding her from Zobelle and Paul. She looks up at him, stunned and wide eyed. Nothing can compute in her brain. She understands nothing. All she sees is blood. "What do you need?" He asks urgently and she blinks several times, slowly coming back to herself.

"Kill him." She whispers and he nods seriously. He presses the gun into her hand and the weight feels surreal. She stares at it, wondering how it would feel to take a life. Then an image of Camila pops into her mind, grinning at her and shaking her head. Jordan joins her, saying something sassy and rolling her eyes. Then it's Rang and Cruz, mouthing off but laughing. Ellie, throwing her arms around their mother and kissing her cheek. It's Ryder and Neva, grinning. Zane and Isaias chasing her around the house. Raimundo, Kalli, and Autumn, smiling at her from their toys. It's Abrielle, peacefully asleep in her arms.

"Feek." Chibs says softly, startling her out of her thoughts. She looks at him then at the gun in her hands. She steps forward, shaking off her daze. She raises the gun to his head and then shakes her head.

"I won't become a killer, not for filth like you." She whispers. "But I'll make you feel pain." She lowers the gun to his crotch and pulls the trigger. She turns around, ignoring the shrieking behind her. "I feel like you all deserve the honor of killing these men." She passes the gun back to Tig and steps aside. They form a line, all raising their guns. Willow is not surprised to see that Abel's is leveled at Paul, as are Ken's and Piper's.

"Sons keep promises." Abel says and she closes her eyes as the sound of guns echoes in the empty warehouse. Someone throws their arm over her shoulder and she keeps her eyes shut as they walk over, guiding her towards sunlight. She doesn't stop until she feels the fading heat and knows she is out.

"Get her home." Rat commands Abel and he nods. Willow sits on his bite and holds tight to his waist as they ride. She's numb the entire ride, until they reach Charming's borders and the streets are familiar once more. She manages until her house. When Abel parks, tears begin to flow down her face.

"Willow." He says alarmed, scooping her up and carrying her inside.

"Shower." She says and he deposits her in the bathroom.

"I'll be right outside, ok?" He tells her anxiously and she nods. Locking the door, she slips out of her clothes and cranks the heat up. She sits under the hot water until she feels like her skin is going to be raw. She gets out, wrapping herself in a towel. Abel's sitting against the wall and stands up instantly.

"I'm fine." She says, before he can get a word in otherwise. "I just needed to wash all… That off me. I just want to go to bed." She says tiredly and he helps her up the stairs. He waits outside her door until she's changed into an oversized tee shirt from Piper. She pokes her head around the door. "Talk to me." She requests and he follows her into her room, slumping in the chair. She crawls into bed and pulls the blankets up to her chin.

"Are you sure you're ok?" He asks her again and she looks up at the ceiling then rolls to face him.

"I've never seen anyone die before." She says quietly and he's not looking at her but rather a photo on her desk. "I didn't know what to expect. Were you expecting to kill a man today?" She asks and he finally looks at her.

"Those that died today, I don't see as men." He says flatly. "They hurt an innocent girl for nothing more than revenge on the people that love her. I see that as incredibly cowardly. Besides, now I know that I can sleep at night and I won't wake up wondering if he's hurting my mom, or Tommy, or you."

"Do they know? That he's dead?" She asks him and he nods.

"I sent her a message telling her it's ok. I'm just relieved it's over." He mutters, rubbing his face.

"Now you can go home." She says carefully and he looks at her, head tilted to one side slightly.

"What do you mean?" He asks and she bites her lip. She's in too deep now.

"Zobelle is dead. The man who raped me is dead. Everything is all right. You can go home." She says, trying to keep all emotion out of her voice. Abel puts his head in his hands, muttering something she can't hear. Then he looks up and crosses the room, kneeling down and grabbing her face.

"I didn't stay in Charming because of that." He says quietly. "I didn't stay here because I was scared or because I thought the club could protect me or because I wanted revenge on Zobelle… I stayed because the idea of leaving you after you went through that… I never wanted to leave you, not even to take my family home. I just wanted to be by your side the entire time. But I was scared you would see me as a reminder of what happened, what you had gone through… So I put distance between us, in case you didn't want me." Willow stares at him, her mind racing. Too much is happening, her brain can't keep up. So she does the last logical thing she can think of. She slides over.

"You're not a reminder." She whispers and he stares at her then the open space. "I'll sleep better with you here." She says, by way of explanation. Without taking his gaze off of her, he removes his boots and socks, then his belt and jeans, then his button up. He lowers himself into her bed, careful to keep distance between the two of them. He rolls onto his back is to her and she sleepily wonders again if he has tattoos. She places a hand on his back and vows to ask in the morning, before falling asleep without the aid of sleeping pills.

 **AN:** Please don't assume that this means this storyline has been resolved, I have a little more planned for Willow and Abel- Friday! Thanks for all the awesome reviews, I love hearing your thoughts. Keep them coming!


	48. Chapter 48

She wakes up to an empty bed and her first emotion is disappointment. She doesn't know what she had expected- Abel to wake her up with gentle kisses and proclamations of love? She stays curled where she is for a long moment, cataloging her feelings.

Relief. The men are dead. They will never hurt her or anyone else again. Guilt. She had killed them. She had sent them to their death. Guilt that she feels so little guilt. And above all, a certain sense of fortitude. She made it through. Today, she will be strong. Today will be ok. She pushes herself up and changes into running clothes, smiling slightly as she ties her shoes.

"Where you going?" Piper asks, as she scrolls through her music, looking for a good playlist, one earbud in and the other dangling.

"For a run." She says, without looking up. "I have way too much caged energy and now that I can finally go somewhere without a babysitter, I wanna go." She informs him.

"Maybe you should still have someone." Piper says worriedly and she looks up, exasperated.

"Pipes, in case you forgot, we murdered the men responsible for this lockdown last night. Now I'm going to run, otherwise I might scream and rip my hair out." She warns and he opens the door for her. She takes a couple steps then relents. "Here's my route." She says, scribbling it down. "I'll be back in like 45 minutes. Do not panic. Do not send a search party." She orders.

"What are you going to do, outrun us?" He calls and she flips him off as she heads down the sidewalk. Running is her drug. The repetitive slaps of her feet as she propels herself forward gives her comfort. She's still moving. She's still going forward. She's still here. So she keeps running.

She jogs home, covered in sweat, cursing the fact that she was born and raised in California. The heat is already suffocating. She winces as she pauses in the front yard, stretching out her sore muscles that are protesting her return to running. Plucking her earbuds out, she walks into the house.

"Oh my god, are you trying to kill yourself?" Ken asks her and she sticks her tongue out. "It's like 98 degrees already."

"This coming from the kid in jeans, long sleeve, and a kutte." She scoffs, grabbing a water bottle from the fridge. "Besides, this is going to be the hottest day this week. When else was I going to sweat?"

"Every damn day." He complains. "California is too damn hot."

"Well, blame the mother that raised us here." She says, flicking water at him. "I'm gonna shower."

"Wills." He says and she glances over her shoulder. "The club is meeting today. They want to talk to you." Her grip tightens slightly on the water bottle.

"About what?" She asks, her voice calm. He gives her the 'don't play stupid' look and she bows her head. He nods, getting up and walking out. She gets in the shower, taking her time to enjoy the cold water.

When she gets out and goes to pick an outfit, she hesitates, her hands hovering over the plain tee shirt and athletic shorts. With a deep breath, she grabs a black, lacy bra and a sheer grey shirt. She shimmies jean shorts on, grunting with effort. She walks over to her desk and rests her hands on top of it.

She yanks open the top drawer, making the stuff within rattle. She reaches inside without really having to look. She already knows what she'll pull up. A necklace with a tiny silver W on it, one she'd had since she was a baby and keeps extending the chain on. Tiny diamond studs, given to her by her grandfather Piney when she had her ears pierced as an infant. A ring that sits on her thumb, a plain band of silver with a crow engraved on the inside. One of her father's less important rings suddenly treasured after his death. And a set of silver bracelets, all engraved with different symbols.

7 bracelets. 7 bracelets that she had special ordered from the Wahewa tribe when she was 14. One has a crow on it. The next has a series of dates- her parents wedding, her birth, her father's death. The next has a feather. The next has a Harley. The next has the anarchy symbol. The next has SAMCRO. And the final has just his name. Opie.

She takes a deep breath and slides them on. They jangle cheerily on her wrist, the sound reminding her she hasn't worn them for a very long time, not since Misty Rogers and her friends had asked Willow why she wore such ugly jewelry and everything had gotten thrown in the drawer. She puts on the rest, adding some of her newer jewelry- a ring Ellie had gotten her for graduation with her birthstone, a long necklace that has a tiny giraffe at the end, her favorite animal. She leaves her feet bare and grabs sunglasses, heading for the clubhouse.

"Hey." She says to Happy when she walks in, pressing her sunglasses onto the top of her head and looking around. "Where is everyone?"

"In church." He says seriously and she looks at him, uncomprehending.

"So should I wait?" She asks, going to sit at the bar. He shakes his head and guides her into church, where everyone is sitting around, looking somber. Happy shuts the doors and takes his place at the head of the table, looking around. Willow remains standing, unsure of what to do.

"We need to discuss your plans for college." He says and her heart sinks. She knew this would happen eventually but she didn't think it would be so soon. She had a suspicion they would use this to get her to stay. She folds her arms and wishes like hell Ellie hadn't left so she would have someone on her side.

"What about it?" She asks.

"Like the fact that you're not going." Piper says loudly and Happy glares. He quiets, still looking angry.

"I am going." She snaps back. "This doesn't change anything."

"Willow, it changes everything." Tig says, looking startled that she doesn't feel the same.

"How?" She demands, a mulish set to her mouth.

"You were tortured! Beaten! Raped!" Rat protests and she turns her furious eyes on him.

"Thank you, I remember, because I was the one who went through it." She says bitterly. "But you want to know what? I am stronger because of it. You men get patches when you bleed for the club. You get to put them on your kuttes and wear them proudly. Men of Mayhem, Unholy Ones, Sons of Anarchy… What do we get? What do the women get? We get scars and nightmares and we are forced to hide them behind a wall of steel, so that you men don't see the damage you do." Suddenly she is wildly angry and spilling all her frustrations at the club. "We are so much stronger than you think or know because we are so much better at hiding our pain. You will never, ever know what I felt in that room, because I will never tell you. I will protect you from that. We women bleed for this club more than anyone and no one takes notices. How many women have died? I was beaten and raped BECAUSE OF SAMCRO! BECAUSE OF MY FATHER!" She bellows and they looked stunned, exchanging glances.

"Willow—" Ken says and she rounds on him.

"You will let me go to school." She orders and he looks at her with wide eyes. "You all will. Because if this whole ordeal is meant to have a bigger purpose, it should've taught you that I can take my hurts for this club no matter what. I will not be safe, not even in our own parking lot. So I will go and I will live my life and I will not shut SAMCRO out even though I have every reason to, because you are family." She holds up her wrist and it's bracelets. "And family would die for family. I was and still am willing to die for this club, because it's in my blood."

The club is dead silent after her outburst. Tig looks close to tears, something that alarms her slightly. Chibs is staring at his hands. Ken and Piper are looking at each other, unblinkingly. Rat eyes her levelly. Happy is expressionless. T.O is nodding his head. Montez has his head down and hands clasped in front of him like he's praying. Quinn has a small smile on his face.

"Motion to allow Willow Jocelyn Winston to attend college at UCLA, provided she let the club check in on her regularly and has her financial loans paid by the club." Happy says and Willow gapes at him. Slowly, hands rise around the table, starting with Tig. Ken's hand is faster than Piper's but Piper follows suit a couple seconds later. Willow, unable to believe her eyes, slowly revolves to look at Rat. For a long second, he just stares at her. Then he raises his hand and Happy bangs the gavel down, making her jump.

"What?" She asks weakly and Chibs stands, pulling her into a tight hug, kissing her head.

"Yer always gonna be SAMCRO." He says roughly. "It's in ya blood, feek."

"I know. I know that now." She mutters, hugging him back as tightly. "I love you. I love you all." Happy nods towards the doors and she closes them quietly, hearing them start other club business as she does. She slides down the wall, covering her trembling lips with her hands.

College, with the club's approval. They are going to help with money. She is free to move down there and retain all connections to the club. She can wear SAMCRO without feeling like she has left her childhood behind. Everything will be ok. She's ok.

 **AN:** Again, not the end, but one of my favorite, favorite chapters to write. Please leave me your thoughts on this one? I love all the reviews I get and I really love that you all love Willow as much as I do. Thank you so much for reading!


	49. Chapter 49

"Got the news you're hoping for?" Abel asks, walking in and noticing her on the floor. She nods, pushing herself back up.

"They know I'm going to college and they've agreed to it." She tells him and he raises an eyebrow. "No more lies, no more sneaking."

"Aren't you scared?" He asks and she frowns.

"Of what?"

"You were kidnapped by some insane old man who wanted revenge for the daughter that died when we were babies." He points out.

"And now he's dead." She reminds him flatly. "You killed him, along with everyone else in this clubhouse. I'm not scared, Abel. I'm not scared because I know if one day the reaper does take me, outlaw justice won't be far behind." She says fiercely and he looks at her, a strange glint in his eyes.

"Do you remember one of the first things that you told me?" He asks her and she thinks back.

"That boys don't last in this club?" She asks and he shakes his head.

"About old ladies." He says and she frowns, not recalling. "You said that they always do what they're told and never question the club and behave like the club wants them to." He says and she nods, it slowly coming back to her. "You said you'd make a terrible old lady."

"I would." She agrees and a smile crosses his face. He takes a step towards her, shaking his head.

"That's very much not true." He says lowly and she's watching him, wary of where this might be going. "Because all the club wants is for the women to be strong. They never question the club because they know they don't have to. The club needs their support or it'll collapse out from under itself."

"So you're admitting that a strong old lady is the best weapon a Son can have?" Willow asks and he nods, now close enough to touch. Willow finds she is no longer scared of the Abel that holds as gun as easily as others hold phones. That Abel is somehow her Abel, the Abel that got her through a terrible moment and was unafraid of her at the end.

It suddenly dawns on her who he is. He is more SAMCRO than she is. He is their prince, their first son, a cursed son. Their heir. He will never flinch away from their guns. He will never stare, wide eyed, at a parade of motorcycles on her street. He will never balk at the knowledge that she can stare the reaper in the eye without fear. He will never judge her for being too strong, too stubborn, too bullheaded for her own good. He will never shy away from the fact that the outlaw life is the only life she's known.

She opens her mouth before she's even sure what she's going to say, but the opening of two heavy wooden doors cuts her off and she spins, watching the club file out. If any of them are surprised to see her there, no one says a word. They just face Abel, every last face serious. Willow knows what's going to happen before it does and she reaches behind herself to grab onto a table.

"Abel Brendan Teller." Chibs begins and it's apparent that he will not get to the end of whatever speech he is planning. "I remember ta day ya were born. A wee thing an' our Jackie boy was so scared fer ya. I remember ta day he left us and our boys did too. I didnae think I'd see another Teller in this." He breaks off, his voice too thick to continue.

"There's a man that should be here to see this." Tig picks up where Chibs left off. "Your father. There are a lot of people that should be here to see this- Jax and Tara, Gemma, JT, Clay, Bobby, Opie, and Piney… But we're here and we're so proud enough for everyone missing. We love you, brother." He says, producing a prospect kutte and handing it to Abel.

Willow watches, stunned, as the men of the club congratulate Abel, patting his back and hugging him, She shouldn't be surprised. This was bound to happen. She had had an inkling since the day he brought her to Red Woody so a man could apologize. Abel Teller was born to be SAMCRO. The men back off and he looks at her with raised eyebrows, swinging the kutte on. It hangs just like she thought it would- a natural fit.

She glides forward to hug him, mind a blurry haze. Some part of it is so right- Abel was meant to be in a kutte from the moment he walked through that door. But the other part of it is terrifying- every Teller to don a kutte has died a terrible death and Abel could be no different. She looks up at him, a billion things she wants to say, but he just grins at her and tangles his hands in her hair. She begins to frown, confused, but Abel cuts off whatever she is going to say when he kisses her.

Her mind is both completely blank and ticking away rationally, as though she has managed to split into two. Her rational side is cataloging the whoops and yells from around her, noting her brothers' curse words and the exchange of money from bets. The other half of her is exploring Abel Teller's mouth. When they break apart and stare at each other, Piper is the first one to break that silence with a loud and an indignant,

"Oi! That's my sister!"

"Opie and Jax's kids, who would've thought." Tig marvels, watching with wide eyes next to Chibs.

"Someone better tell Lyla." Rat mutters.

"Someone better tell Wendy." Chibs corrects and Willow leans around Abel to give both of them an incredulous look. They break into identical mischievous smiles and Willow reaches up, absentmindedly patting Abel's cheek.

"Swimming lessons." She says, by way of explanation.

"I'll see you after." Abel says with a grin and Willow nods, still a little stunned. Not even Piper's grumble of, "my sister" can distract her and she locks herself in her car, breathing deeply. Then she grabs her phone and calls the most important person she can think of.

"Hello?" Ellie asks, sounded as though she's barely restraining herself.

"Hi El." Willow says, voice quivering.

"What's up?" Ellie asks and Willow narrows her eyes suddenly.

"You already know, don't you?" She asks and Ellie breaks down in giggles.

"Of course I do." She says smugly.

"How?" Willow demands and Ellie starts laughing.

"Piper texted me the instant it happened. I mean, Ken and I did have a bet going and I had to collect." She says and Willow can about picture her, smiling contentedly, counting her money.

"I hate you all." Willow grumbles and Ellie scoffs.

"No you don't. I'm proud of you for kissing a boy Willy-Bear." She says and Willow feels like throwing something. "Even if you waited until he had a kutte on to do it. Looks like you didn't work through daddy issues after all." Ellie says wickedly and Willow hangs up the phone in retaliation.

 _'Meet me at the coffee shop.'_

She sends the text to Jordan and Camila then speeds there, needing to put distance between herself and the club. She feels guilty that she has been avoiding her two closest friends. They had stopped by a couple times in the past weeks, but Willow hadn't told them much. Now she feels like they deserve everything. She has enough time to get her favorite iced coffee and sit down before they both arrive, ordering their own drinks.

"So, is he a good kisser?" Jordan asks, before she's even sat down and Willow gawks at her.

"HOW?" She roars and Jordan grins.

"Bowen told me right after you left. I was gonna tell him I needed proof Willow Winston let a biker kiss her, but then you texted me." She explains and Camila doesn't say a word, just beams.

"Yeah, well, he did." Willow grumbles, pouting.

"And how was it?" Jordan asks pointedly and Willow throws her hands up.

"It was good." She admits. "He's a good kisser." Camila claps her hands and Willow gives her a look. "But I don't think it means anything!" She protests and both girls groan, rolling their eyes.

"You are so incredibly smart, yet so incredibly dumb. Tell me, how does that work?" Camila asks and Willow looks at her, affronted. Camila stares back evenly. "Willow, he kissed you. That alone usually means a guy likes you."

"Ok, but this is Abel we're talking about." She says and both Jordan and Camila say nothing. "It's like, he knows my history and my family and my plans and… He shouldn't like me." She finishes lamely.

"Well, neither should we." Jordan snaps and Willow looks at her, startled. "You shut people out Willow. You and I were perfectly good friends until I met Bowen. Then you got crazy protective of your club. No other girls can come into the life you're trying to escape from. You judge anyone who wants to be SAMCRO but when it's convenient for you to love it again, it's fine?" Willow opens and shuts her mouth, no words coming out.

"And once you decide that you accept SAMCRO, you shut us out even more." Camila adds and Willow swivels to look at her. "We wanted to be there for you Willow. But you spent every second either working or with the club. We just wanted to talk to you and see what you needed, but we weren't SAMCRO and we weren't allowed to touch you." Willow bows her head.

"I guess…" She says slowly. "I just don't know how to be SAMCRO and be normal at the same time."

"Just like you were when I first met you!" Camila says impatiently. "The girl that became my best friend back then was so easy to like. She was funny and sweet and kind and tough as hell. Do you remember when Piper came to get you out of school one day?"

"I told him to go fuck off." Willow recalls, remembering the showdown she had had with her brother in the hallway.

"Yeah, you did. And then the next day a guy in a kutte brought you lunch because you forgot it. You walked that line so easily Willow. You just overcomplicate shit because you feel like your life should be really difficult. Stop being Willow the martyr. Just let things be simple." Willow looks at her two best friends, who have clearly talked about this and they stare back.

"Well… Thank you." She says, somewhat stunned. That confuses them and they exchange a look with each other.

"For?" Jordan asks hesitantly.

"For reminding me of that." She says honestly. It's true, she needed to hear that. "I'm not perfect and you guys remind me of that. And I'm so sorry that I do it. So much has happened lately." She clasps her hands so they stop shaking. "And I guess I've been lost in it and I should've came to you because you're my best friends and you just want what's best for me."

"Yeah, we do." Camila agrees firmly.

"And that's why I wanted to talk to you two about Abel kissing me." She says, her cheeks tingeing pink at the memory. "He's prospecting for the club and the club just told me they're going to help me out with college and it's so much." She says, shaking her head.

"We've got all afternoon." Camila says comfortably, taking a sip of tea and fixing Willow with a look. Jordan nods, setting her phone aside. Willow grins and takes a deep breath, starting from the beginning.

"So now what?" Jordan asks curiously, when the story is finished and all their drinks are gone.

"I have no idea." Willow says honestly.

"Well of course they're going to get married and have children and live happily ever after." Camila says dreamily and Willow raises an eyebrow. "I love happy endings." She says needlessly.

"Well, my happy ending today sadly involves individual swimming lessons." She says, checking the time on her phone and sighing. "I should go, I still have to change."

"Wait, Willow." Camila says when Willow gathers her stuff up and she glances up at her. "The men, that hurt you. What happened to them?" She asks quietly and Willow ducks her head then swings her purse on and slips her sunglasses on to cover her eyes.

"They're dead." She says lowly and both their eyebrows shoot up. She turns and walks back to her car.

 **AN:** Well, it was bound to happen eventually... Tell me what you think? Stick around to see what happens in the next chapter? Go read my newest SOA story, Charming Little Moments? Thanks for reading!


	50. Chapter 50

"Hey, how were lessons?" Lyla calls when Willow walks in.

"Good. I'd rather teach individual lessons all day for the rest of my life than keep teaching Zane and Isaias both." She says back loudly and Lyla pops her head in the kitchen, grinning.

"And how was the rest of your day?" She asks pointedly and Willow stares at her in disbelief.

"Is there anyone in this town that doesn't know my business 5 minutes after it happens?" She rants and Lyla just laughs, walking in and pulling her into a hug. Willow accepts it, begrudgingly.

"Somewhere, wherever they are, Jax and Opie are sitting on their bikes, laughing and talking about how strange it is to watch their kids fall in love. I bet your daddy is proud." Lyla whispers and Willow buries her head in her mother's shoulder and isn't sure if she's smiling or crying.

* * *

"I see your escort has been lifted." Melanie comments as Willow walks into work, humming as she replies to Camila.

"What?" She asks, looking up and Melanie rolls her eyes.

"No motorcycle today. Are you done being grounded?" She asks and Willow smiles brilliantly.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." She says cheerfully and Melanie shoos her away. Willow winks at Kara and smiles at Devon.

"Ready for lessons tonight?" He asks, as she shoves her tee shirt and purse in the small cubby bearing her name.

"Actually, yes." She tells him and he raises an eyebrow. "I have a new method of controlling the devils."

"And may I ask what it is?" He asks, tossing her some sunscreen and she smears it on her cheeks.

"Do you remember being a ten year old boy?" She asks and he frowns.

"Vaguely. Everything was bigger and I was confused by a lot of things." He says honestly and she grins.

"Yeah, but what scared you?" She prompts and he ponders it.

"Ms. Westly." He says and she cocks her head to one side. "The gym teacher. She made us do pull ups." He explains and she laughs.

"Ok, true, but what else?" She asks, turning and opening the question up to the rest of the guards.

"Math tests." Erick suggests and she shakes her head, pointing to Ryan.

"Shopping with my sisters." He says and she shakes her head, grinning, rotating to Seth, who's prepared.

"Girls." He says and she puts her hands up.

"Ding, ding, ding. Ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner." She says and Devon still looks perplexed.

"Ok and how does that help us make sure those two don't wreck havoc?" He asks and she steeples her fingers.

"You know the girl in our class, Ada?" She asks and he looks at her for a heartbeat before the understanding sets in.

"No." He breathes.

"Oh yes." She says, nodding gleefully. "I have it on good authority from Neva that she overheard them talking and saying that they think she's cute."

"You're evil for using that against them." Seth says as Devon looks at her in admiration.

"No, they're evil and don't listen. I'm just being fair." Willow corrects and Melanie whistles and points the clock, sending them to their stations.

* * *

"I'm so excited." Devon says, practically bouncing up and down as Willow dangles over the edge of bin, straining to reach the last kickboards.

"Why?" She grunts, tossing a couple more at him.

"I want to see you in action with this evil plan of yours." He tells her and she grabs the last kickboard and groans, massaging the indents in her hips.

"How many times do I have to tell you guys, it's not evil?" She complains, as they walk to the deep end.

"From a guys standpoint, it's a little evil." He critiques and she shrugs.

"Good. Then maybe they'll stop being such brats." She says darkly and Devon just grins. She's treading water as the kids arrive and jump in with her. Zane and Isaias arrive last, jumping in close to her and purposely splashing her. She pushes them both under then clambers out, tossing kickboards.

"Down and back, warm up." Devon orders and off they go, competing to see who can kick the biggest splash.

"Alright, I was going to be lenient, but no more." Willow says, wringing out her hair and Devon looks pleased.

"Do you guys know what this is?" Devon asks, hefting a large object.

"A brick, duuh." Zane drawls lazily, "Anyone who isn't stupid can tell that." He and Isaias chortle and Devon glances at Willow.

"Very good, wittle Zanie." She says, cloyingly sweet. Zane narrows his eyes at the nickname. "You're so smart. And since you're so smart, can you guess what we're gonna do with it?"

"Dive for it." He says, now looking nervous as to where this is going. Willow gasps, as though he's surprised her.

"Very good Zanie-baby! We're gonna dive for it! Do you wanna go first?" She asks and before he has a chance to reply, she kneels so she's level with them. "It's ok if you don't. When he was a little baby, he wouldn't even dive for things in the bathtub." She confides in them and when Ada giggles, Zane goes bright red. Willow stands up, grinning.

"I can get it." Zane says, with gritted teeth and Willow chucks the brick in. Zane doesn't even let it sink to the bottom before diving after it. Isaias is eyeing her warily and she stands back with a smug smile, folding her arms.

"Amazing." Devon marvels.

"And to think, women retain this power over you men our entire lives." She says and he shakes his head. Zane comes up, spluttering, brick in hand. "Very good!" Willow says, clapping. "Does Isaias wanna go next? Did you guys know that when he was a baby, he liked to—" Isaias dives under and Willow clamps her mouth shut, satisfied her plan has worked.

"Ok, you guys can go off the board the last 5 minutes of class." Devon allows and they scramble out of the water, yelling at each other. Zane and Isaias hang back. Willow raises an eyebrow at them.

"Aren't you gonna go back flip or something?" She asks and Zane shakes his head, grinning. "I don't like this. Out with it." She orders and Zane bumps Isaias, who blurts out,

"Are you dating Abel now?"

"What?" She asks, completely blindsided. "Why would you think that?"

"Dad was telling mom that Abel and you were kissing at the clubhouse. Does that mean you're dating?" Zane asks and Willow dives in the pool to avoid them. When she resurfaces, the boys are on the diving board and Devon is looking at her, amused.

"All you MC kids react the same way." He observes and she splashes him. Classes end and Willow and Devon help with the cleanup, then walk to their cars. "Is it true though?" He asks, shuffling his feet. She looks at him over the top of her car, forehead wrinkled.

"Is what?" She asks, bemused.

"You and this Abel guy. Who is he even?" He asks and she bites her lip.

"We knew each other when he was little, but he moved away." She explains. "He came back and now he's prospecting for the club. We kissed, yeah, but I don't think it means anything." Devon nods, though he doesn't look convinced. He shakes his head and slams his door shut.

"Ok, I know it's none of my business who you date, but promise me one thing." He says and she nods. "He wasn't behind those bruises you had, was he?" She looks at him, startled. She thought she had hid them well enough.

"God, no." She says hastily. "No, I got in a little accident. Abel had nothing to do with it."

"Ok." Devon says, looking somewhat relieved. "I just… Want you to be safe, Wills." Willow feels an uncomfortable twist in her gut. It hadn't surprised her when she found out Devon had offered to be her swimming lesson partner, despite her having the worst age group. He is a tall swimmer, ginger with freckles and a lopsided smile. He should be easy to love.

"I am." She reassures him with a smile. "See you tomorrow, Dev." She climbs into her car and closes her eyes briefly. Ellie was right. Clearly she hasn't worked through her daddy issues; otherwise she would have dated the Devon in her life, instead of waiting for an Abel.

 **AN:** A little bit more on Willow's life and how the kids act... Please leave reviews, tell me what you think, thanks!


	51. Chapter 51

The week progresses normally, though Willow is half expecting something to happen. She works, sees Jordan and Camila, and yells at her brothers when they make her mad. Ellie updates her on the progress she's making in decorating her house, though Willow has to swallow her sassy retort of why bother when she'll move in with Gavin soon enough. She has no business at the club, so there's no reason for her to go see Abel.

It's normal, till Friday. Willow supervises as Zane and Isaias do whatever Devon tells them, testing their skills. At the first sign of misbehavior, she gives a slight cough and they both flinch. At the end of the tests, Devon hops out of the pool and he and Willow wander off.

"Ada passes for sure." He says and Willow nods, putting a checkmark by her name. Down the list of kids they go, declaring pass or fail. Finally, Willow looks at the last two names on the list with narrowed eyes.

"Do I pass them and run the risk of them being hellions next year or do I hold them back to teach them a lesson?" She muses.

"Don't be terrible." Devon chides and she sighs deeply.

"Alright." She huffs, checking their names off.

"Looks like you'll be teaching level 6 next year." Devon says, grinning and she sticks her tongue out, flouncing off to the office. Melanie wanders through the crowd, dispersing slips that say whether or not the child has passed. Zane and Isaias snatch their slips and run to Willow regardless.

"Did we pass?" Zane demands and Willow points to their slips, tight lipped. With groans, they tear them open and read over them eagerly.

"Yes?" Isaias questions and Willow sighs.

"It amazes me that you two ever passed kindergarten, but yes." She tells them and they high five. "Wait for me in the car, I have to drive you home!" She calls as they tear off. Devon slings an arm around her and she wiggles just out of reach. He doesn't appear to be bothered.

"One section of lessons down, three to go." He says cheerfully and she makes an angry face then grins.

"At least all my family took their lessons this section, so we don't have to deal with them anymore." She says happily.

"You call them your family but you aren't related to any of them." Devon says quizzically and Willow looks up at him.

"Of course I do. I grew up with them. I changed their diapers and mashed their peas and I know who likes applesauce and who you can bribe with ice cream. In my opinion, that makes us family." She says pointedly.

"Family is blood, in my opinion." He informs her and she shrugs.

"And to me, that's crazy. Family should be whoever you want it to be." She says, slightly defensive, watching as Zane high fives Autumn for passing.

"Family is men in leather, huh?" He asks lowly, looking over her shoulder and she follows his gaze, her stomach doing a backflip when she sees who is waiting for her. Abel is leaning against his motorcycle, listening intently to the chattering Kalli, who looks to be demonstrating her freestyle to him. Willow grins and turns back to Devon, her smile faltering when she sees his frown.

"What?" She asks and he tears his eyes off Abel to look at her.

"He looks exactly like the kind of guy I pictured you with." He says, his attempt to be offhand failing. Willow looks at him, unsure of what he means. "Looks like he could rip a guy in half, shoot him, and walk away without remorse." He specifies and Willow narrows her eyes.

"And what kind of girl does that make me, if he's what you picture me with?" She retorts and Devon opens his mouth but she's already walking away. Abel glances at her then is quickly distracted by Kalli.

"And then I had to tread water for 15 minutes." She says seriously and Abel raises his eyebrows.

"1 minute." Willow corrects and Kalli glowers at her. "But I'm sure you could do 15 minutes." She relents and Kalli beams. "What's up?" She asks Abel, standing behind Kalli and gently detangling her hair so she can braid it.

"Was told to come make sure you got the kids home safe." He informs her and Willow rolls her eyes.

"I've been taking care of these nuggets since before they could walk and now I have a babysitter too?" She asks, raising her eyebrows.

"Don't yell at me, the guys just want to make sure everyone is home safe before they ride." He says and Willow looks at him quizzically, wondering why he seems so short with her.

"Get in the car." She orders, rounding up the kids and getting in. She heads toward home, glancing at Abel in her review mirror.

"Can we have ice cream for supper?" Autumn pipes up.

"No." Willow says instantly, turning up the radio automatically to drown out her impending hissy fit.

"Thanks for watching them." Zaneta says gratefully when Willow pulls into the driveway and kids spill out. She's strapping bags to Happy's bike. Willow nods then jerks her head towards Abel.

"What's his deal?" She wonders and Zaneta shrugs.

"Last I checked, he offered to stay back and watch the kids with you. Hap thinks it's a good idea. He's not sure if he's ready to explain to the other charters that Jax's son is back in the MC." She says lowly.

"Is that a big deal?" Willow asks, slightly confused and Zaneta clams up, yelling at Isaias for pushing Raimundo over. "Well, for someone who claims to want to stay, he's been pretty damn quiet." She mutters and Zaneta shrugs.

"Men will be men, Willow-girl." She says wisely and Willow rolls her eyes.

"Well, they should be better behaved." She grumbles, watching as Cruz and Zane wrestle in the front lawn.

"Everyone behave!" Rat yells over the noise in the house.

"Unlikely." Neva comments, perched on the counter, immersed in her phone.

"Well, you can at least try." He says, exasperated then turns to face Willow and Abel. He points to them and Willow raises an eyebrow. "No fucking while the kids are awake."

"George!" Willow says, stunned, while Abel goes pale.

"What?" He asks, unperturbed. "Bee and I use to have sex when she watched you and Tommy. But only while you were asleep, that was Gemma's rule." He reminisces fondly and both Willow and Abel are gaping at him.

"No, the rule was no sex when the baby was there, we just broke it." Brooke corrects, kissing Willow's head when she walks by.

"Frequently." Rat adds with a smile and Willow shakes her head, covering her ears and squeezing her eyes shut.

"Oh my god please shut up." She begs. "If you love me at all, you'll shut the fuck up and never talk about your sex life again."

"Bye sweetie!" Brooke calls, walking out the door. Rat points to Abel sternly.

"But seriously, don't fuck her." He says seriously and Willow howls, getting up and hurrying away.

"Why were you yelling, Willy-Bear?" Kalli asks her as Willow seeks refuge in the playroom.

"Because I'm mad at your daddy." She informs her and Kalli simply blinks then returns to her toys. Willow wanders around the house, checking all the kids to make sure they're fine. The boys are clustered in the basement, knee deep in Doritos, Mountain Dew, and video games. Rang, Cruz, and Ryder are allowing Zane and Isaias to hang out with them, a small miracle. Neva is curled up on the couch, watching a TV show. Raimundo, Autumn, and Kalli are busy building a complicated pillow fort and she leans against the door, watching them with a smile.

"Where's Bri?" Autumn asks, looking up at her. Willow frowns. The baby hasn't cried once since she's arrived.

"I'll go look." She promises Autumn, turning and wandering toward the bedroom where Jaycee had put the sleeping Abrielle. She pushes the door opens and peers in, her heart stopping when she sees the empty playpen. Swallowing down her panic, she pulls the blankets aside, though she knows they aren't hiding Abrielle's frame. She crashes into the couch and Neva looks up at her.

"What?" She asks, as Willow comprehends that the baby isn't with her. She takes a deep breath, running her hands through her hair and trying to squash the urge to cry hysterically.

"Did the boys take the baby?" She asks, knowing there likelihood of that happening is tiny.

"No." Neva says with a frown.

"I did." Abel says, rounding the corner. Abrielle is tucked neatly into the crook of his arm and he's feeding her a bottle. Willow collapses into the couch, her legs unable to support her weight any longer. "Are you ok?" Abel asks, concerned and Willow shakes her head, walking towards him and kissing Abrielle's soft head. Abel watches her with worried eyes.

"I checked the playpen and she wasn't there." Willow explains, smiling at Abrielle and trying to quit trembling. "I got nervous."

"Well, she was crying, so I figured I should grab her." Abel explains, sitting down in a chair and shifting Abrielle with a practiced air. Willow watches curiously, settling next to Neva.

"Where'd you get so good with kids?" She asks him and he shrugs.

"Tommy." He says and Willow shakes her head.

"No, you're only a couple years apart from him." She points out and he keeps his eyes firmly on Abrielle.

"I told you, I know teen moms." He says quietly and she feels a hot jolt of jealousy within her abdomen.

"And how many of those babies are yours?" She quips and Neva grabs her headphones and leaves the living room.

"None." He says and she just pulls the blankets up to her neck. She closes her eyes, trying not to be bothered by Abel's attitude towards her and failing. She thought it would be different with him. That he would understand her biker family and why she shuts them out from time to time. Instead, he seems further away than ever. She falls into an uneasy, restless doze, twitching frequently.

She's not sure if she's awake or asleep. She lingers in that half stage, unable to comprehend what's going on. Her limbs feel heavy and sluggish. She hears the voices of the kids as though from a great distance, like she's deep underwater. She feels as though she should wake up, but can't bring herself to it.

Someone brushes a hand over her forehead, gently grazing it in a kiss. A solid weight is distributed into her arms and she curls protectively around Abrielle, knowing the little girl by her smell alone. Her blankets are drawn up around her shoulders and she feels the same pull into the darkness.

 **AN:** A weekend with Willow and Abel playing house, what could go wrong? (A lot, cause this is Charming) Please leave reviews, tell me what you think, tell a friend, anything!


	52. Chapter 52

She wakes up suddenly, her eyes popping open in a slight panic. The room is dark, lit by a single lamp. The house is quiet and Abrielle is sound asleep in her arms. She shifts slightly so she has a better grasp on the baby then gets up, keeping her level. Abrielle doesn't even twitch.

She sticks her head into the playroom, smiling when she sees the nest of blankets of the floor. Kalli and Autumn are side by side, separated by a flimsy pillow, wearing their matching pajamas. Raimundo is sprawled out nearby, his blankets kicked off. She shuts the door quietly and looks in the other bedrooms. Zane and Isaias are asleep in the bunk beds. She shuts the TV off and closes the door. Neva is fast asleep in her own bed, her phone buzzing on her bedside table. She walks into the basement. Cruz and Rang look over their shoulders at her. Ryder is asleep on the couch next to them.

"Brush your teeth." She orders quietly and they nod, going back to their game. "Where's Abel?"

"He went outside. He made sure everyone was in bed. What were you doing?" Rang asks her.

"Asleep." She says ruefully and they look at her curiously.

"Are you sick?" Cruz asks and she makes a face.

"Please try to be in bed at a reasonable hour." She requests and they snort. She wanders back upstairs, opening the door to the patio. Abel is reclining in one of the large chairs, gazing up at the stars. She sits next to him in silence, nestling Abrielle into her chest.

"The stars are better at home." He says quietly and Willow looks upwards. Though their neighborhood is fairly dark, only the brightest stars are visible.

"Where's home?" She asks and he's quiet for a long time.

"Norco." He says finally. "I lived on a farm there for awhile when I was a kid, before mom got a house in the city, closer to the hospital. On clear nights, we could see what we thought was every star in the sky."

"You and Thomas?" Willow asks and he shakes his head.

"Yeah, me and him and Lucius." He says and she frowns slightly.

"Lucius?" She asks and he inhales a shaky breath.

"Nero's son. He lived with us for a while, but he has spina bifida. He's in a home now." He explains.

"Who's Nero?" Willow asks, mildly confused and Abel sighs.

"He loved my grandma Gemma. So when my dad killed himself, Nero took my mom and us to his farm. He watched over us." He tells her and Willow struggles to place the name in the few mentions she's ever heard of Gemma.

"Does your mom know you're prospecting?" She asks, rubbing Abrielle's back when the little girl fusses.

"She does." He confirms, sounding tired.

"And?" Willow pushes.

"And what Willow?" He responds sharply and Abrielle gives a little whimper. Both falls silent as Willow settles her back into sleep.

"And she is proud of her son or does she remember what she brought you out of, when you left Charming?" She asks him back and he stays quiet. "I thought a mother wouldn't want to put her child in danger. I try to protect kids that aren't even my flesh and blood, I can about imagine what I would do for ones that are." She points out, getting up. "Thank you for putting them to bed. Goodnight."

"Willow," Abel says wearily but she slides the patio door shut, ignoring him. She lays Abrielle down in the playpen and climbs into bed herself, replying to her mother's texts, Piper's texts, Ellie's texts, Jordan's texts, and Jaycee's texts. She hunkers down beneath the blankets, scrolling aimlessly through social media, hardly taking any note.

"Me and you baby girl." She whispers to Abrielle, rolling on her side so she can watch the baby sleep. She's drifting off when there's a soft knock on the door. She sits up and Abel pushes the door open.

"Hey." He says, voice hushed. "Can we just talk?"

"About what?" Willow asks, drawing her knees up to her chest and resting her head on her knees. He doesn't say anything but sits down next to the playpen and gazes at Abrielle.

"My best friend Lucy is a teen mom." He says quietly and Willow frowns at the direction this is going. "She had a little girl when we were 16. My friend Josh is the dad and when she found out and told him, he told she could go get an abortion and then we could go to a movie or something after. When she decided to keep it, he completely freaked out. He's a good kid but he wasn't ready to be a dad. So my mom helped out and by default I did too." He informs her.

"That's nice of you." Willow says, wondering where this is going.

"You remind me of her." He says, finally looking up at her and Willow remains impassive, not sure if this is a compliment or not. "How great you are with kids. You're going to be a great mom some day."

"And some day is far, far away." She says and he shrugs.

"Point is, I'm sorry. I was rude." He says and she raises an eyebrow.

"I thought since you're a part of the MC now you'd stop saying sorry." She says and he looks contemplative.

"I don't know what to do." He says quietly and she's reminded of Jordan and Camila in the coffee shop.

"Just cause you're SAMCRO doesn't mean you have to change who you are." She says and he gives a little snort. "Don't do that." She chides. "It's corny but it's true. This life, it eats up who you are inside and it takes any of the independence that you have. This family is a pack and it feels like if you're outside it, you'll die. But just because you're in it doesn't mean that's all you are."

"It's all I wanted to be." He muses. "Even as a little kid, when I had no idea what it meant. I had a ring and some memories of my dad. It's different for Thomas I guess. He's never been interested in it, but with me, it's all I could think about. And now that I'm here I just want to know that I'm making the right choice." Willow looks at him in surprise.

"I never pictured SAMCRO as a choice." She says and Abel looks up at her. "SAMCRO wasn't a choice for me. It still isn't."

"You're choosing to go to college." He reminds her.

"And I told them about it." She responds.

"You weren't planning on it." He shoots and she's quiet, trying to think of how to respond.

"And then I was kidnapped and raped." She says, almost inaudibly and Abel flinches. "If that taught me anything, it taught me that sometimes bad shit happens. But what's gonna stop bad shit from happening to me? I could be the mayor's daughter and still get hurt. But at least I know that SAMCRO means having uncles and brothers and aunts and a mother and sister that will drop everything to be there when bad things happens."

"So you like the protection." Abel states and she shakes her head, frustrated.

"I like the family. I like that these people are all I've ever known, even if that drives me absolutely crazy. I like that I love them, no matter what. Even when I want to escape. I like that they're where I learned to be strong from. You don't get to pick your family."

"You did though." He protests. "Tig and Chibs and Happy and Rat, they're not your blood."

"They killed for me." She says coolly and Abel falls silent, looking surprised at her tone. "And you did too. In my book, that makes us family."

"I don't know how you can handle it." He says, hanging his head and Willow scoots closer to the edge of the bed.

"Handle what?" She asks, frowning.

"This." He says, gesturing wildly. "This life. You act like it's normal, like you have no second thoughts. You said that I would fall out. That boys don't last in this club. What if I'm a boy, not a man?" He asks desperately.

"It is our choices that show us what we truly are, far more than our abilities." She says sagely and Abel looks at her, incredulously.

"Did you just quote Harry Potter?" He demands and she can't help herself. She giggles.

"Maybe."

"Unbelievably." He says, shaking his head. "Try to have a serious conversation with you and all the sudden Harry Potter." He gets up gingerly and she's surprised at the end of the conversation.

"Do you want to stay in here?" She offers. "The couch isn't very comfy." He pauses at the door then shakes his head and shuts the door quietly. She sinks back into the pillows, unsure what this rejection means.

 **AN:** I love that at it's essence, SOA was all about family, so I thought it was fitting that these two discuss family. Leave a review, let me know your thoughts?


	53. Chapter 53

She walks out of the bedroom, yawning. She ties her hair up before a solid mass hits her around the waist. She looks down into Rai's dark, pleading eyes, his arms wrapped around her.

"Can I have chocolate chips in my pancakes?" He begs.

"No." She automatically then frowns at him. "Wait, pancakes?" He nods, pulling her into the kitchen. Abel stands in front of the stove while Kalli and Autumn sit at the table, talking. Zane and Isaias are standing on either side of Abel, holding whisks and flour.

"Alright, mix it up good." Abel orders and Zane complies instantly. Willow is stunned into silence. Lately Zane has listened to no one but his father and the men of the club.

"Willy!" Kalli says loudly, noticing her. "Can we have chocolate chips in our pancakes?"

"No." Willow says, walking into the kitchen. "You'll put a ton of syrup on them anyway, you don't need more sugar."

"You hate us." Raimundo accuses, pouting.

"Yes, I hate you for trying to keep you out of the epidemic of childhood obesity." She shoots back.

"What's obesity?" Autumn asks curiously.

"When you're super fat." Abel answers, flipping a golden pancake.

"Like Mrs. Jones?" She asks innocently and Willow snorts.

"Her preschool teacher." She explains to Abel's confused look. "That's not very nice." She scolds Autumn, who is wide eyed.

"She is really fat." Ryder comments, walking into the kitchen in his boxers and Willow smacks him. "Sweet, pancakes. I'll go wake up the guys." He says cheerfully and Abel smiles.

"Let me guess. Some famous chef from Belgium taught you how to make the perfect pancakes." She comments to Abel.

"Belgium is famous for waffles." He corrects her, sliding a pancake onto Kalli's plate, grinning as the little girl cheers. Willow sits at the table, watching as the kids eat, complimenting Abel's cooking ability.

"What are your plans for today?" She asks then and Cruz shrugs, folding up a pancake and shoving it in his mouth.

"We're gonna go hang out with the rest of the guys." Rang says and Willow narrows her eyes. "What?" He asks, with faux innocence.

"Don't get into any trouble or I'll be angry." She threatens and they snort, clearly not scared of her. "Take Ryder." She orders.

"Yupp." Cruz says shortly, grabbing his skateboard and all three boys flee. Willow sighs then looks to Zane and Isaias.

"We're going to Toby's house." Isaias says and she nods. Their neighbor is a friend of the MC and she knows they'll avoid trouble there.

"I'm gonna hang around you." Neva says, flicking water at Kalli, who giggles.

"Me, you, and the littles." Willow says ruefully, watching as Raimundo draws shapes in his excess syrup. "Oh, joy."

"What are we gonna do today?" Autumn asks curiously, swinging her feet.

"Get you washed up, first thing." Willow says, noticing how bits of her hair are sticking her face.

"Can we take a bath?" She asks excitedly and Willow shakes her head.

"Not if you want to actually do things today." She bargains and Autumn pouts but doesn't pitch a fit so Willow's thankful for winning the small battles. She washes the girls' hands and faces then sends them on their way to change as Neva wrestles Raimundo into a change of clothes. She gathers up Abrielle's diaper bag, blowing raspberries on her stomach before changing her into light clothes. Settling her on her hip, she walks out; surprised to see Abel helping Kalli into her sandals while Autumn sits besides them, swinging her feet.

"Ready to go?" He asks her, patting Kalli's back when he finishes buckling the sandals.

"We're going to the park. Are you coming with?" She asks him, shocked.

"I promised that I would show Rai how I do a super underdog." He says nonchalantly and Rai nods seriously.

"Well, get in the car." Willow orders, glancing at Abel out of the corners of her eyes. They scurry to the large SUV, fighting over who gets to sit where. Abel puts his helmet on, revving the bike up.

"Willow, is Abel coming with us to protect us if the bad men come?" Kalli asks, kicking her feet and fiddling with her seatbelt. Willow's grip tightens on the steering wheel as the bike roars out in front of them.

"Yes, baby." She says, trying to keep her voice calm. "Cause the club protects you. Always."

"I love my uncles." Kalli says happily.

"My daddy is your uncle." Autumn says seriously and they fall into a conversation about family.

"I'm happy you think that." Neva says quietly and Willow smiles at the little girl, sliding her sunglasses down her face. When they arrive at the park, she sprays sunscreen on the kids then sets them loose. They sprint away from her, bellowing at the top of their lungs.

"Incredible." Abel says, shaking her head as Willow spreads a blanket out and sits down, plucking Abrielle out of her car seat and placing toys around her. The little girl eagerly grabs a stuffed motorcycle.

"What, the volume they can reach?" She asks, as Neva chases a screaming Autumn towards the slide.

"At least you know you'll never lose them." He decides, flinching as Raimundo rockets past, war whooping.

"Never worried about that a day in my life." She promises and Abel looks at her thoughtfully. She smiles slightly, reaching into the diaper bag and producing her book.

"Not Harry Potter?" He asks, reading the cover. "I figured you would, after last night."

"Please, I read all seven books when I was younger. I try to reread them at least once a year." She informs him and he stares at her.

"Why are you reading The Compass of Pleasure?" He asks her and she smiles at the book.

"It explains a lot of things about why we like what we like, like drugs, alcohol, and sex. Interesting read when you live around this crowd." She tells him and he raises an eyebrow, gesturing for her to toss it to him. She does so and flops down by Abrielle, grinning at her.

"It's actually pretty interesting." He comments awhile later and Willow looks at him in surprise.

"Are you actually reading it?" She asks in disbelief.

"Yes?" He says in confusion. Willow looks at him, Abrielle's toy dangling, forgotten, in her hand.

"I didn't think you'd be able to." She says flatly and he frowns.

"What does that mean?" He asks, affronted.

"Just that… The topic… You're not… I just…" She stutters, flustered and Abel throws the book back.

"I said Tommy got the brains but not all of them. My mom is pretty smart for a sober drug addict." He comments, getting up and grabbing Raimundo, asking him if he's ready for a super underdog.

"Men, baby girl." Willow says, kissing Abrielle's head. "Stay away from them. It's not worth it."

"Willow, do you have snacks?" Autumn asks, collapsing on the blanket dramatically and grabbing Abrielle's toys.

"Give that back." Willow says, tossing a fruit snack to her and then to an incoming Neva. Autumn tears hers open enthusiastically.

"Aren't those things loaded with sugar?" Abel asks, carrying Kalli around his neck as Raimundo trails after them.

"No." Willow says, frowning at him and catching Kalli as she slides down. "I'm pretty sure I would've figured it out since we only buy them in bulk." He shrugs, cuddling Abrielle.

"Just trying to make sure they don't run off at top speed." He says innocently and she rolls her eyes.

"I never expect such noble intentions from you." She quips and he heaves a long-suffering sigh.

"I don't know what I did to inspire such distrust in you." He complains and she just turns to pull sandwiches from the diaper bag so the girls stop whining. They travel from park to park, letting the kids run until they get tired of it before heading to the next one.

"This is the last park." Willow warns, parking the car and turning to look at them seriously. "So play as long as you want, but when you're done, we're going home and that's the end of that." Kalli and Autumn nod, while Raimundo appears to be sizing her up. She stares him down until he nods then unlocks the doors.

"Thank god this is the last one." Abel says, sitting on a park bench. Willow remains standing, rocking Abrielle.

"It's a pain now but trust me, when you take them home and they eat supper and go straight to bed, it's a blessing." She comments, flinching as Kalli trips running up the stairs and promptly wails. She passes Abrielle off to Abel, hurrying to pick Kalli up and set her in the step above her.

"Is it bleeding?" Kalli asks, wide eyes filled to the brim with tears and bottom lip trembling. Willow glances at her knee then shakes her head. "Is it gonna be purple?" Kalli asks and Willow nods, hugging her close.

"Tomorrow, yes. But it'll be cool. Battle scar." She reassures her and Kalli looks at it with wonder.

"Cause I'm a warrior princess?" She asks breathlessly and Willow nods seriously. Kalli nods back then gets up, hollering, "Autumn! I have a new idea! We're WARRIOR PRINCESSES!"

"That's not a thing." Raimundo scoffs.

"Sounds like the dragon is scared that the warrior princesses are going to slay him." Willow says coolly and walks away when she hears the screams of the girls running after Raimundo.

"Nice save." Abel comments, opening his own bag of fruit snacks.

"Careful. Cavities." Willow shoots back, stealing one from him.

"Don't worry, I floss." He says, unconcerned. Willow rolls her eyes and sits, reading her book. He abruptly shifts, handing her Abrielle.

"Well hello." She says in surprise, as Abrielle startles awake and begins to whine. "Thanks for the warning."

"Hello." Abel says shortly, answering his phone and pacing back and forth.

"No." Abrielle says crabbily and Willow nods distractedly, kissing her forehead, eyes on Abel.

"We'll go home soon baby girl." She promises. Abel is listening and nodding, something that Willow knows doesn't bode well. "What?" She asks, the instant he hangs up. "Something's wrong, you have the little frown line." She says, pointing to his forehead. He frowns, pushing her hand down.

"Don't joke. There's been blowback on the club for Nick. Apparently he was affiliated with some club. Chibs and Tig are trying to clear things up, but they want to talk to the people that were there." He says seriously and Willow's mind can't process anything beyond 'blowback'. She has visions of men taking a screaming Kalli away, Neva's hands bound in front of her, Ryder with a blindfold on, scared and alone. Her heart stops in her chest.

"The littles." She whispers, clutching Abrielle close. Abel grabs her face tightly, forcing her to look up at him.

"Willow, listen. Ellie and Gavin are already halfway here, they're going to meet you at Zaneta's and watch them with you. I'm going to take the kids back with you and get everyone home, but then I have to leave and ride up to the club. Let's get the kids." He says and she nods, passing Abrielle back to him.

"C'mon guys, time to go home." She calls, her voice perfectly steady.

"But we're not tired yet!" Kalli protests.

"I am." Abel says and she relents, stomping back to the car.

"Alright, lets go." Willow orders, herding them into the car.

"What's going on?" Neva asks lowly, bucking Raimundo into his seat.

"Ellie's coming to visit." Willow informs her and Neva's face lights up. Willow shuts the door and turns, nearly running into Abel.

"Nice." He says, buckling his helmet.

"It's not a lie." She argues. "She doesn't need to know the truth yet."

"Good luck getting Rang and Cruz home without telling them the truth." He says and she swears loudly.

"You two are where?" She demands loudly into the phone, making Neva snicker. "How are you at a party, its not even dark yet!" She says, outraged. "Jesus Christ, would you two listen to me for one minute? I don't give a shit if you bring the party to our house, just come home!" She orders. "THIS IS NOT A DISCUSION MICHAEL GET HOME NOW." She hangs up her phone and tosses it into the cup holder, making a noise of disgust.

"You should get dad to call him." Neva advises.

"If he's not home by the time I get there, I will." Willow says darkly. When she arrives home, she bites back the urge to use a more creative string of swearwords at the amount of bikes and skateboards in the front yard.

"Hey Wills." Rang says sassily, from the driveway. "You said I could have party, right?" She flicks his nose as she walks past.

"Gavin is getting here in less than 15 minutes, so lets see who sticks around." She hisses and he looks at her, a flicker of worry behind his dark eyes. "Now get your sister out of the car." He drops the basketball and walks for the car, catching Abel's arm on the way. Neva carries Abrielle in and Willow takes the baby, heading for the bedroom and playpen.

"Willow!" Abel yells.

"Bedroom." She calls back, changing Abrielle's diaper. He strides in, zipping up his kutte. Willow looks up at him and raises her eyebrows.

"You're leaving aren't you." She says flatly. "I'd tell you to be careful but that's a waste of time."

"Ellie should be here soon." He says, ignoring the jab. "The boys are downstairs, I told them to have their friends leave when the little kids go to sleep. Neva is watching the rest in the playroom."

"Alright." She says monotonously, finishing swaddling Abrielle and setting the little girl on her feet. She wobbles for a moment then sets out for Abel, arms in the air. He picks her up, kissing her nose.

"Keep them safe." He says quietly, his bright smile offset by his serious tone. Willow's stomach feels as though she's going to puke, so she swallows hard and nods.

"You keep the rest safe." She says thickly. He looks over Abrielle's head at her, eyes slowly growing cold. Willow stares back evenly, wondering if anyone else has ever noticed how his eyes can hold such light and are the color of the sky on a warm summer day. If they've ever noticed how when his anger takes over they shift to a deadly blue, the color of ice that will crack and plunge you into cold water. She wonders if people know that he can be different people in the same body and she's not sure which one she likes better.

He walks towards her slowly, Abrielle babbling in his arms. Willow unfolds her arms, expecting him to hand her the little girl. He does, but in one smooth movement, wraps his arms around her waist and puts one hand at the back of her neck, gently tilting it so she's looking at him.

"I'll do my best." He promises and she nods. He stares at her a moment longer then hurries away from her. She watches him through the window, as he gets on his bike and roars down the street.

"What it would be like, little one, to not worry about seeing someone again when they ride away like that." She mummers to Abrielle, kissing her head then walking into the kitchen to make supper.

 **AN:** And a little more interaction with all the kids of the club... Plus some Willow and Abel. I plan to update Friday/Saturday, but I'll be traveling to the great land of little wifi so it may or may not happen. Let's hope. Also hopefully updated this weekend- my second SOA story, Charming Little Moments- it's a bunch of one-shots so if you like that, check it out. Thanks for reading and leave reviews?


	54. Chapter 54

"Is it true Ellie is coming home?" Zane asks, cutting Kalli's chicken. Willow nods, setting the fruit on the table.

"Why?" Cruz asks and Willow gives him a look.

"Because Abel had to go join the club, so Ellie's coming to help me watch all you troublemakers." She says, glaring at him.

"That's a lie. Mom said Abel shouldn't join the club, that's why dad wanted him to hang back." Rang says easily and Willow looks at him in disbelief. "So for him to go up there, even though he's just a prospect, means we're in trouble. Otherwise you'd just watch us." He scoffs and Willow leans around Neva to grip the pressure point in his arm tightly. He goes white.

"Maybe, but you'd do best to shut your fatass mouth around the littles." She hisses and he nods. She releases him as the door opens.

"Hi guys!" Ellie says cheerfully, walking in, Gavin close on her heels. The little kids shout and run to give her hugs.

"I just got them to sit down and eat." Willow complains and Ellie guides everyone back to the chairs before kissing Willow's cheek.

"Everything ok?" She asks lowly and Willow nods.

"There's crow eaters everywhere outside, so I think now that you're here, we should just lock it down and let them watch a movie. Hopefully the club will be back tomorrow just like we planned." She says under her breath and Ellie nods seriously, then turns and plucks Abrielle out of her highchair.

"You alright?" Gavin asks Willow and she nods. He nods back and when he turns, she sees the gun tucked into the waistband of his jeans. She bites her lip and shakes her head. This is her life. Then, forcing a smile on her face, she orders Raimundo to eat his peas.

* * *

"Why's Jordan calling you again?" Zane asks, tossing her phone to her. Willow catches it, answering the call with a frown.

"Hello?" She asks and flinches as Jordan's shrieking washes over her. "Jordy, I can't understand you." She says calmly, locking herself in the bathroom.

"Something is wrong with the club." Jordan screeches.

"No shit." Willow says evenly and Jordan is stunned speechless for a second. "Shit usually is. That's what life is like with the club."

"What do we do?" Jordan asks desperately.

"We sit. We wait." Willow says heavily, leaning against the sink and looking into the mirror, frowning at the lines she sees in her forehead. "We hope and we drink and we curse and we don't pray, cause believing in some sort of God is a lost cause at this point."

"I'm scared." Jordan admits and Willow closes her eyes, leaning forward and pressing her head into the cool glass.

"Well, get tough. That's what being a crow eater is about Jordan. You have to be a thousand times stronger than a Son because they'll need it." She waits until Jordan's breathing evens out then hangs up, unlocking the door and walking out. She stops in her tracks at Ellie waiting expectantly for her.

"Was that Abel?" She demands instantly and Willow frowns, trying to sneak by her. Ellie stops her.

"No." She relents. "It was Jordan having a panic attack about Bowen. She's fine now." She says wearily.

"Shame. I wish I would've been around to see you in person with him." She muses and Willow rolls her eyes at her sister.

"I'm telling you El, he kissed me once and he hasn't been interested in me since. He's got that kutte and by the this time next summer when he's full patch, he'll be balls deep in crow eaters." She complains.

"He'll be full patch by Christmas." Ellie says, looking at her oddly and Willow stops trying to squeeze past her and instead stares in disbelief. "Don't you remember the legacy rule?" She asks and Willow continues to stare blankly. "Sons of Sons patch in after six months. That's how it was with dad and Jax, how it was with Pipes and Ken, and how it'll be with Abel and the rest of them." Ellie informs her, jerking her thumb at the boys gathering in the basement.

"He's full patch in six months?" Willow asks numbly and Ellie nods, patting her head sympathetically.

"We'll discuss this tonight." She promises, darting to catch Kalli before she falls off the back of the couch.

* * *

"Go to sleep soon please." Willow calls down the stairs, receiving only the sounds of video games in response. "Go down there and crack heads at midnight." She orders Gavin. He raises his beer and flips through the channels.

"Goodnight, I love you." Ellie says to Raimundo's room, where Kalli and Autumn are sleeping. She shuts the door and looks at Willow expectantly. Willow deflates, collapsing on the couch.

"What do you want to know?" She grumbles.

"Everything." Ellie says promptly.

"I already told you, everything was fine, until he got a kutte. Then he kissed me and refused all contact after that." She describes.

"Well, did anything else happen?" Ellie prods and Willow just releases her breath in a long stream, ignoring her sister.

"He's scared." Gavin says and Willow nearly falls off the couch twisting to look at him. "Committing to the club is the biggest life decision he can make and he's worried you're gonna judge him for it. Which, going by your past attitude towards the club, is easy to understand. He's scared that he's going to fall for you but you're going to break his heart by not loving him back because he chooses to put on that kutte every day. He doesn't want to drag you down with him because he thinks you view this as the wrong choice." He sums up, taking another drink of his beer. Willow exchanges stunned looks with Ellie. They stare at him in silence for a couple long moments before Willow manages to croak out,

"Oh."

 **AN:** We're getting closer to the end... Please keep letting me know about whether you like it or love it or hate it. Thanks for reading!


	55. Chapter 55

Willow looks up at the sounds of motorcycles and snatches Abrielle off the floor where she's playing, running for the front yard. Quinn's bike isn't even fully parked and Jaycee is flying off it, sprinting towards Willow and her daughter. Willow passes her to her and runs for her mother, who's getting off Tig's bike.

"Oh, Willow." She says, grabbing her in a tight hug and swaying on the spot.

"Is everything ok?" Willow asks, her voice muffled from her mother's shoulder. Lyla nods, inspecting Willow's face.

"Is everything ok here?" She asks and Willow nods, stepping aside so Ellie can hug their mother tightly. Willow side steps her mother and reaches over to kiss Tig's cheek. He pats her cheek and she moves to hug Piper and Ken, mindful of any injuries she might touch on.

"What happened?" She hisses to Piper, grabbing his hand and holding on so he can't escape to the house.

"Turns out Nick was a prospect for a club up there." He says tiredly. "So they misinterpreted our decision regarding his life and had some words with us. Once Abel arrived and showed proof of our honesty, the beef was settled."

"And Abel?" Willow asks, despite herself. Piper nods at someone behind and Willow turns. Abel is leaning against his bike, arms folded. "Glad he's back ok." She says shortly and Piper slings an arm around her, leading her back into the house. She resists the urge to look behind them.

"We owe you so much for watching them." Brooke says, grabbing Willow in a tight hug. Willow squeezes her back tightly then smiles up at her.

"You know I don't mind it." She says sincerely.

"I don't know what we're going to do when you're at college." Brooke mutters, gathering up Kalli's toys. "They'll never listen to anyone like they listen to you." She frets.

"They don't listen to me." Willow points out and despite the worry on her face, Brooke cracks a smile.

"So imagine how they'll be for someone new." She responds and Willow snorts, shaking her head. She walks past Quinn talking to Ryder, his tough face softened somewhat as he listens to his son talk animatedly about the fact that he'd beaten Rang in whatever video game they were playing.

"I think you're spending too much time on that thing." Quinn comments, but Willow sees the pride in his eyes.

"It's that or sleeping." Willow says, bumping into Ryder.

"Or eating." He reminds her with a grin and she nods, working her away around the house as the club gathers things up and prepares to head separate ways. Willow waves at Autumn as Jaycee straps her into her car seat.

"Long weekend?" Happy asks and Willow nods, the exhaustion washing over her. All she wants is her bed.

"The boys weren't terrible." She informs him and he glances over his shoulder to nod at Cruz.

"I told them to stop giving you trouble." He tells her and she raises her eyebrows in surprise that that's been working. "You don't deserve it. Thank you for holding down Charming while we were gone." She bows her head and he leaves.

"Can we go home now?" She asks Ken, leaning against him heavily. He looks at her, amused.

"Should I carry you inside while you sleep, like I did when you were 2?" He asks and she sticks out her tongue.

"I might fall off your bike, fair warning." She tells him.

"I might not care, fair warning." He retorts and she punches him hard in the arm. He rubs it, affronted.

"C'mon children, lets go home." Lyla says, walking between the two of them and they follow her outside.

"Ya ok?" Chibs asks, smoking a cigarette in the driveway. Willow nods, tucking herself into his side briefly. "Get sum sleep." She slides on the back of Ken's bike, holding on to his waist. Lyla sits behind Piper and three bikes come to life instead of two. Willow twists to see Abel on the street behind them.

"Is he coming home with us?" She asks, but either Ken can't hear her or he choses not to. Her question is answered when all three bikes are parked in the driveway. She proceeds inside, opening the fridge and grabbing leftovers with a thankful sigh. She tosses them in the microwave.

"Didn't eat supper?" Piper asks.

"There's no time to do anything with those kids." Willow complains, tapping her foot impatiently.

"I can vouch for that." Abel mutters, walking in and dropping his bag on the floor loudly. "They never stop moving."

"You were worse as a kid." Lyla tells him and Abel looks at her in surprise. "I swear, we could let you run the entire length of Charming and you wouldn't be ready for bed at night."

"Well, you should've seen Tommy growing up." Abel recovers swiftly. "Kid is a machine."

"Well, he learned from the best." Lyla says with a smile, disappearing into her room. Willow jumps when the microwave beeps and pulls her leftovers out, greedily devouring it.

"You know you're going to die if you don't breathe between bites right?" Piper observes. Willow flicks him off.

"I'm heading for the shower." Ken announces, walking downstairs. Willow stays where she is, leaning against the counter.

"Screw the shower, I just want my bed." Piper mutters, following Ken. Abel raises his eyebrows at her as the kitchen empties.

"I assume you'll want the same." Willow comments, eating another large bite. Abel shrugs.

"I'm not terribly tired. The adrenaline from staring down the barrel of several guns has me wide awake." He tells her and her hand clenches the fork a little tighter involuntarily. She relaxes it, looking down at her feet.

"Thanks for keeping them safe." She says quietly.

"Bowen told me what you told Jordan." He says, not meeting her eyes. She looks at him, wide eyed. "About being a crow eater. How you have to be a thousand times stronger than us."

"And?" She prompts. He exhales, pacing the kitchen, running his hands through his hair. "Abel, what's wrong?" She asks worriedly and he looks at her with a half terrified, half furious expression. He gestures wordlessly.

"You!" He manages finally and Willow frowns, turning to put her dirty dishes in the sink. When she turns around, he's only a couple steps from her, a desperate look in his eyes. She looks up at him, surprised.

"What about me?" She asks evenly, trying to figure out what brought this mood on. Abel sighs and leans forward, so his forehead rests against her own. She holds very still, astounded.

"You talk about what it's like to be a crow eater so naturally. I told you you'd be a good old lady. I meant it." He says honestly and Willow leans back so they're separated to look at him with narrow eyes.

"What are you trying to get at here Abel?" She asks warily and he spins away from her again, that same distressed look in his eyes.

"I'm trying to get at the way you make me feel." He mutters, rubbing his face. "I'm trying not to act like you're the only thing on my mind constantly. I trying to tell you somehow that you're the one person I think about, all the time. I think about you when I'm on my bike on an open stretch of road. I should be enjoying the ride and all I can think about is how I want you on the back of my bike, what you're doing, if you're safe… All I think about is you." He reveals.

"Abel…" Willow protests automatically. He shakes his head and plunges on.

"I think about what you want. And I know you don't want this life. Why would you? You're so smart. You're beautiful and you're hilarious and you're charming. You can have whatever you want with the snap of your fingers and there's nothing here that I can offer you that isn't out there in the big, wide world. You have so much talent and you're fearless. You look at the world and you don't see what could scare you, you just see what you can take. And I love that about you. I think you're the most amazing girl on this planet and somewhere there is a guy in a suit with a trust fund who will give you nice dresses and jewelry and here I am. All I can offer you, you already have. All I am is an outlaw." He says desperately. Willow stares at him, gob smacked.

She's not sure what to say. The only thing that manages to float across her stunned brain is Ellie's voice whispering, "I told you so". She stares blankly at Abel, whose blond hair is messily raked away from his face and blue eyes are searching her face for something. Her two futures are laid out, side-by-side.

In one she will go college, she will spend the nights alone in her bed, trying to navigate the murky waters of dating boys. She will meet a boy, fall for him, and have her heart broken. He'll promise sweet words and then take them back, dismissing her without a second thought. She'll flirt and lie and pretend not to be who she is. She'll date and kiss and forget them in the morning. And she might find a boy between clubs and classes and events that doesn't flinch away when she tells him what she comes from.

In the other she will stride across this kitchen and kiss Abel firmly. He'll squeeze her tight and pick her up slightly, kissing her back with just as much passion. He'll run his fingers through her hair and when she sees him next, she'll blush and he'll smirk. He'll pull her in for another long kiss and soon they're getting coffee and lunch together, spending time together between the club and work. She'll go off to college and when she comes home for Christmas he'll meet her with a smile and a full patch. One night he'll get drunk and the next morning there'll be tears and promises to never to do it again. There will be epic fights and even better make up sex. And then there's that moment when he will decide that she's his old lady.

Willow stays very still, mulling her options over in her head. She's wavering, not sure what she should decide. Some part of her brain is still ticking away steadily, giving her logical pros and cons to each side. Then the image of her as a baby pops into her head. That stained couch, half filled bottle of liquor, and a man in a kutte staring down at her with all the love in the world. She raises her eyes to Abel's and sees an expression so similar it takes her breath away.

She crosses the kitchen in a couple easy steps, eyes locked on Abel. He's watching her with anticipation and her chest feels as though someone has lit a fire in it and it's expanding to bursting. She stops and stares up at him. His expression has none of the cocky attitude she's come to expect, just a vulnerability that makes her chest swell even more. A smirk crosses her face.

"I told you, I've never seen a man ride into SAMCRO and not ride out with a prospect kutte on his back. Guess my record is still perfect." She points out and when he opens his mouth to protest, she grabs the back of his head and pulls him down to kiss her. After a moment of hesitation, he deepens the kiss, pulling her hips closer to his.

Willow pulls back first to draw a shaky breath and looks up through her lashes to see his reaction. He's looking at her and she sees the flicker of desire in his eyes. She exhales and laughs, reaching up to kiss behind his ear. He moans slightly, digging his fingernails into her waist. She intertwines her fingers with his and tugs him towards the stairs.

They sink down onto her bed, Abel roughly tugging her shirt up so he can explore her stomach. She follows his lead, pulling his kutte off and slipping her fingers under the waistband of his jeans. He sucks in a breath and she grins, finding his mouth. He grabs her ribcage and moves her further up, hovering over the top of her, one knee between her legs.

She gasps, an overwhelming urge to vomit overtaking her. She tries to breathe but the air isn't making it to her lungs. She presses on his shoulders desperately, wheezing, her eyes bulging. In a flash, Abel is off the bed and across the room. Willow sits up shakily, drawing her knees to her chest and using them to support her chin. She closes her eyes and focuses on making sure her breathing returns to normal.

"I'm sorry. I should've known." Abel whispers, his voice sounding broken. Willow opens her eyes and finds him sitting in her chair, head in hands. "Wills, I'm sorry. I should go." He stands up and Willow leaps off the bed, catching his hand. He looks at her, eyes glistening.

"Abel, it wasn't you." She says, the words rolling off her tongue before she can even try to formulate what she's going to say. "Are you forgetting that you were the one who got me out of there? I just need… To go slower." She reassures him and he's still.

"I knew that trauma like that leaves scars and I completely disregarded it. I could've caused something much worse." He mutters.

"But you can also fix it." She says softly, gently guiding him back to her bed. "The last time I got a full nights sleep with no nightmares was when you stayed with me. Please stay again." She asks and he nods without looking at her. They carefully climb into bed, Willow placing Abel's arms around her.

"Are you ok?" He asks her, his nose nuzzled into her hair. She smiles slightly at the sensation of his hot breath against her scalp.

"Perfect." She murmurs back.

 **AN:**...Please please please leave me reviews on this chapter, I really want to know what you guys think! Also, updates will likely be sporadic, as it's Christmas week. I'm hoping today, Wednesday, Saturday, but I wanted to let you all know it may not work that way. Thank you for reading, please give me your thoughts!


	56. Chapter 56

She wakes up to the feeling of someone still pressed up against her back and she smiles to herself, rolling over without opening her eyes. When she doesn't collide with a body, she frowns and cracks her eyes open. She spots a piece of paper on the bed next to her and picks it up, reading and rubbing her eyes.

 _Willow, I'm downstairs. Didn't want your brothers to know._

She stretches out, pulling on an oversized sweatshirt and walking downstairs, looking around blearily. Abel is sitting at the kitchen table and she smiles, entering and making her way towards the fridge.

"Get my note?" He asks, reading the paper.

"I did." She confirms, grabbing the orange juice and holding it up. He shakes his head, gesturing to a glass of milk. With a shrug, she pours herself a glass and stands behind, reading the top stories. "Any trouble with the club?"

"None." He says distractedly, scanning the paper. "Give it a couple days though just in case."

"Of course." She says, resting her chin on his head. He twists so he's looking up at her. She raises an eyebrow.

"About last night." He says and her heart sinks. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have tried to move that fast with you."

"That?" She asks in surprise. "Abel, I told you, it's ok. I just needed a second to compose myself. You didn't do anything wrong. I didn't even know I would react like that. I just think if we take it slow, I'll move past it."

"Are you sure?" He asks worriedly and she nods. "I don't want to make it any worse for you."

"You make it better." She promises, leaning down and kissing him. He grabs her face, gently cupping it and kissing her back.

"JESUS CHRIST!" Ken yells and they spring apart, Abel looking ashamed, Willow looking annoyed. "That's my sister!" He yells and Willow frowns, dipping her fingers in her orange juice and flicking the liquid at him.

"Quit yelling." She orders and he looks outraged.

"PIPER!" He bellows and there are several loud bangs and Piper appears at the top of the stairs, looking pained.

"What?" He asks, bending down and massaging his shin tenderly.

"These two were kissing." Ken says furiously and Piper shoots up. Willow throws her hands up.

"Do not do this with me today." She warns and both brothers look undaunted. Abel leans back, a small smirk on his face.

"She's gonna raise hell." He tells the boys quietly and they take no notice.

"Willow, I thought we talked about dating." Ken says pointedly and Willow folds her arms.

"I thought we talked about staying out of my fucking business." She shoots back coolly.

"Abel's a great guy but you're not dating anyone." Piper says flatly and Willow smiles that same smile Abel saw the day he met her. All danger, no kindness. The smile of a predator.

"And I thought I told you I didn't give a flying fuck. I'll date whoever the hell I damn please you two. And if it were some frat boy with a yacht and private jet, you'd best like it. And since it's a Teller in a prospect kutte for a club his grandfather founded, you'd best like this too. Because I'll date whoever I please and I'll fuck them too and you'll get no say." She says calmly. Then she leans down and kisses Abel, her hand dangerously close to his crotch. She bites his lip and gently tugs, then straightens up and blows a kiss to all three of them, walking back upstairs.

"I'll fucking kill you." Ken warns Abel, who puts his hands up.

"How the hell do I turn her down?" He points out and Piper's only response is to growl. Willow smiles at her closet, digging into the back of it and pulling out her outfit for the day.

"Go change." Piper says flatly when Willow walks back into the kitchen. She ignores him, cleaning up the dishes and humming to herself. Piper repeats himself and gets the same response. "Willow, if you don't change I'll lock you in your room." He threatens.

"Oh will you?" She asks sweetly and Abel freezes, looking at Piper with wide eyes. He's trying to tell him to back off with his eyes but Piper blazes on, disregarding everything.

"Yes, I will! You can't be walking around in that." Ken says, looking in disgust at her tight jeans, black tank top, and cleavage.

"Really?" Willow asks icily, turning around and brandishing a dirty spatula like a weapon. "Because you two fuck women dressed like me. You treat them like garbage; you use them and throw them away. They're someone's daughters and little sisters too, dumbass. So stop treating me like I'm a little angel and them like they're shit." With that she throws the spatula in the sink and slams the door on the way out.

"I love when she gets self righteous on you." Abel says fondly.

"I hate it when she makes me think." Piper complains.

"You know what this means, don't you?" Ken asks Abel, who raises his eyebrows. "You know what loving her means, don't you?"

"That I'll have you breathing down my neck today and every day for the rest of my life?" Abel suggests.

"No. That you will protect her every second of every minute and hour and day and week and month for the rest of your life. And if you don't, if she gets hurt, if she even comes close to being hurt, you will be killed by a lot of angry men and no one will ever, ever find your body." Piper promises and Abel has no doubt he's correct. He nods seriously and gets up, following Willow.

"Hey." He calls and she looks up from rummaging around in her car. "You look good." He compliments. She raises an eyebrow, looking down at her skintight clothes.

"You mean I look like a crow eater." She says, not falling for his charm. He grins and shrugs.

"I figured old lady was a little bit easier for you to handle." He says sweetly and she rolls her eyes.

"Old lady is only correct when a Son has decided to get into a committed relationship with that woman." She reminds him and he frowns. "So that means that unless you intend to be mostly faithful with me, I'm just wearing what anyone affiliated with the club would wear."

"You're missing a piece." He says smoothly and she glances down. Her necklace, bracelets, and ring all sit where they belong. She looks up with a frown and he's offering her another ring. A gold ring, one that has 'son' clearly stamped on it. She gasps.

"No." She says automatically, turning the gift down. "That was your father's."

"And you clearly don't know the story behind it." He says and she looks at him. "My grandma gave it to my dad when he made the decision to go SAMCRO. But my dad didn't wear it. He put it on the finger of the only woman he would ever love his entire life. He gave it to his Tara, his love. I like to think that he would want me to do the same." He says, catching her hand and sliding the ring onto her middle finger. Willow stares down at it, awestruck.

"Abel, this means…" She says softly and he puts his forehead on hers.

"This means that I want you to stand by me, as long as you can. As long as I'm what you want, I'll protect you. I'll love you. I'm going to be SAMCRO and there's nothing that I want more than for that to mean that you'll be SAMCRO too." He says softly and she says nothing, just twists the ring on tighter.

"Then lets go for a ride." She whispers, nibbling his ear. He grins and buries his face in her shoulder, hugging her tightly. She swings her leg over the bike, grabbing tightly to his kutte. He pauses, rubbing her knee. Then the bike thunders to life and they pull down the driveway. She lets a smile take over her face and as they pass the city limits, she throws her arms wide open, feeling as though all the freedom in the world lies just ahead.

 **AN:** For all of you thinking this is the end, close but not quite... Please leave me reviews as presents? And I hope everyone has a great holiday season, whatever you celebrate! Thanks for reading, come back Saturday!


	57. Chapter 57

Six months later, Willow stands at work, juggling several credit cards, mind still on the last final she has before she can head home for Christmas break. She knows she should be studying, but work had called and she wants the extra cash to spend on Ellie's Christmas and engagement present.

"Oh, watch out, got a what looks to be a ROAC coming in." Her fellow waitress hisses and Willow stifles a groan, still ringing up the credit card. It stands for rowdy old asshole crowd, a code word so that they can warn each other that men who look like trouble are coming into the restaurant.

"Seriously?" She grumbles.

"Your section, I'm sorry." She says on her next pass by and Willow just finishes up totaling the bill before plastering her best vapid, pleasant smiling on her face and turning around. Her smile is wiped right off her face, replaced by a look of disbelief when she sees the men that are looking at her. She's still for a moment then goes sprinting across the floor, shrieking,

"Guys! Guys! What are you doing here?" Abel is the one to catch her of course, picking her up off the ground. After him is her brothers and Bowen, then Tig and Happy, then Chibs, Rat, and the rest.

"Had to check on you, of course. Making sure you're keeping those spotless grades up." Happy says and she rolls her eyes good-naturedly, beaming at them all. She takes them to their seats, kissing their cheeks and asking about the ride. She doesn't bother to take a drink order; she knows it by heart from running drinks at the clubhouse. When she gets to the bar, several of the waitresses are looking at her in disbelief.

"What?" She asks, grabbing the captain and coke.

"You know them?" One asks, stunned.

"Of course." Willow says with a shrug. Then she can't resist and adds, "It's my brothers, my boyfriend, and all my dads." She smiles brightly and returns to the drinks. She passes them around the table and slides into the booth, tucking herself into Abel's side.

"How many more tests do you have?" Piper asks curiously and she sighs, rubbing her temples.

"Just one, thank god." She says happily.

"Shouldn't ya be studyin'?" Chibs asks and she makes a face at him.

"It's an easy final. Besides, I could use the money." She says dismissively.

"If you need something, you just ask." Rat says sharply and she waves a hand, trying to reassure them.

"It's not that. It's just that I like a little extra cash, to surprise you all for Christmas." She says mischievously then kisses Abel's cheek. "I'm getting back to work. I'll be done at 4, you all can pick me up then." She says and waves.

When her shift is done, she pulls her hair from her braid and massages her scalp, closing her eyes in relief. She picks up her purse and glances at her phone, smiling at all the pictures Ellie has sent her, ranging from centerpieces to the menu. She sets about replying when someone catches her arm.

"Hey, Willow." Another older waitress, Johanna, says with wide eyes. "Those guys that came in today, you said they were your family?" She asks and Willow nods, nonplussed. "I just… My ex husband was a biker." She explains and Willow is taken aback.

"I didn't know that." She admits and Johanna shakes her head.

"It was a long time ago. Point is, I know how an MC works. And that many guys today?" She asks, raising her eyebrows. Willow frowns.

"What about it?" She questions, just as a deep rumble announces the arrival of her escort.

"Just that who are you," Johanna asks, with wide eyes, watching as the bikes keep rolling up. "That you warrant this amount of protection?" Willow smiles as the lead biker steps off his bike and walks up to them, a confident grin playing in the corners of his mouth. His kutte is a full patch and is proudly emblazoned with a patch that says 'Men of Mayhem'. Willow tears her eyes off of him long enough to smile at Johanna and pull her sunglasses down, fiddling with a thick gold ring sitting on the middle finger of her left hand.

"I'm no one." She says breezily. "Just a Crow."

 **AN:** Fun fact, the last bit of this story for the first thing I wrote, when I had no idea who it would even be about. Never did I ever think it would turn into this. Thank you to everyone who has read this- tell your friends, tell me what you think, anything. I am so grateful you love Willow as much as me. I will say that for right now, she'll soon be making an appearance in my new SOA story, Charming Little Moments. (check it out?) If I'm going to write more Willow/Abel, where should I go? Her going through college? Them when she's done? When they're older? Let me know what you think! I'm thinking I'll start writing her after the New Year, once I hammer out a story-line, so give me ideas! And I cannot thank you all enough for everything!


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